My Alleged Husband

Chapter 1699: Chapter 1493: Fate That Cannot Be Changed

Some people’s destinies cannot be changed, no matter how much they give up, in the end they can only face the outcome.

”Zhentian, actually, there are some things deep in your heart that you are very clear about. Those things cannot be forgotten just because you want to, just like what I have done to you today, the things I’ve said. You think you can treat them as if they don’t matter, but deep down, aren’t you at all conflicted? Aren’t you at all hurt deep inside?

I believe you are equally hurt deep inside, because you are a man, and with the dignity a man should have, you wouldn’t want your wife to be desired by anyone else, nor would you want her to have another man in her heart, especially when that man is not you. This is an immense insult to you.

Over the years, I have seen your sincerity towards me, but I have always chosen to ignore it, turning a blind eye to your earnestness, and regarding every sincere word you said as mere noise. I know it’s really unfair to you to do this, but some things I just can’t handle. I could only tell you and fight against you in this way because maybe only then you would gradually let me go.

I once read a book called ”Letting Go is a Kind of Beauty”. Letting go is a kind of fulfillment, do you know? When I saw this book, I was so shocked. I wondered why others could let go so perfectly, turn away so flawlessly, even if at the moment of turning, tears filled their faces, yet they could decisively leave. But why couldn’t I?

If back then, when you were pursuing me, I turned away resolutely, would this tragedy not have happened today? Would you not have been hurt so deeply by me? All of this is a mistake I made, but in the end, it has made you bear this pain along with me, and I really feel sorry about it.

Some things really cannot be let go of. You can’t let go of the past, nor can you forget all that I’ve told you. Since this is the case, why do we need to force ourselves to be entangled together, while both of us hold guilt and restlessness in our hearts? Is this the life we want? This only pushes each other step by step to a dead end, not realizing what mistakes we’ve made and what choices we’ve chosen until the other has nowhere to retreat, and what consequences these choices have brought, whether we have gotten what we wanted in this lifetime!”

Zhang Zhentian completely understood the intention behind his wife’s words. She just wanted him to let go and fulfill her wish to leave him, but for him, wouldn’t that be the hardest thing in the world?

”Maybe you’re right, but for me, I have no way to fulfill this. Maybe it’s because I don’t have that much magnanimity. But do you know? Whenever I think about letting go and the woman I’ve cherished and pampered for decades no longer being mine, my heart aches like it’s being sliced apart. I cannot bear that kind of pain, and I don’t want you to bear that kind of pain either. I just want us to live a stable life, is it really that hard? Give me a way out and also give yourself a way out, isn’t that better?”

You think I can’t let go of the past, but today I want to make it clear to you that as long as you are willing to try to give me a chance, try to love me, try to stay by my side!

Then I am willing to let go of all the past for you. I can treat all those things that happened before as if they never happened. I will still love you as before, still accompany you by your side, never leaving, until the end of my life.

Maybe you don’t quite believe what I said now, but do you know? Every word I say to you is sincere, I’ve never thought of deceiving you, even when you’ve told me so many lies, in my heart, I still believe in you. I’m still willing to make choices and decisions that are considered unwise in the eyes of others for you, but I just want you to stay by my side. I’ve come this far, I believe you won’t be as cold-hearted as you were before, knowing in your heart that you have feelings for me, and yet pushing me a thousand miles away...”

Hearing his father’s words, Zhang Yichen felt a bit conflicted inside. His heart trembled along with it. Even his father could let go of his preconceptions for his mother, for his lover, so why couldn’t he? His wife was someone he’d painstakingly searched for ten years to find. That kind of feeling isn’t something that can be cut off just like that. Can’t he really make some sacrifices for her? Must he remain so independent, allowing his life’s major events to be ruined by these small matters?

Maybe only by truly letting go of the past is the best choice for each other’s future. Maybe only by doing so will everyone realize what kind of life they want in this lifetime and what choices they will make because of what kind of life. Maybe those choices will bring great benefits for a lifetime, or maybe they will leave one laden with debt.

Ran Zhihan had some thoughts too. He didn’t understand why his parents could come this far, but his own husband wasn’t willing to let go of some past preconceptions?

If his husband could do that, how wonderful it would be, how happy would his life be, no one could know.

”Zhentian, some things can’t be let go of just by saying so, you should understand that, even if you swear here, you can let go of the past, but can your heart really cross that hurdle?

I don’t want you to do anything reluctantly. I just hope you speak and act according to your heart, and hope you can live happily. I don’t care, I don’t mind how painful my life is, as long as you can be happy, it’s fine. I’ve owed you too much in the past, I have never thought of making any changes for you, but now I just want to pay for you!

And I hope you don’t foolishly invest all your feelings in me as you did before. Ultimately, doing so will really leave you very, very tired. One day when I leave, it will feel like the greatest blow to you, and that’s not the ending I want to see. What I want is you smiling brightly at me.

But the words you said today really moved me. Maybe one day I will fall deeply in love with you, until the day comes when I can’t extricate myself, immersed in this lifetime. If that day really comes, I hope you can truly leave the past behind as you said today, and live sincerely with me!”

The root of pain is facing what you want to change but being powerless!