My Alleged Husband

Chapter 1693: Chapter 1487: Take Away My Heart

Hearing the music I love, I think of you, so familiar, hearing a familiar voice, I also remember everything I used to do.

Zhang Zhentian heard Zhang Ni asking him a question, and he didn’t know how to answer.

Over the years, I have indeed wronged my grandson. If I hadn’t stubbornly chosen to leave this family back then, how could everyone in this family end up like this?

This all turned out this way in the end, and I cannot blame anyone. It’s all consequences of my own doing, who hasn’t walked the wrong path?

But the mistakes I’ve made are already too deep, with no way to make up for them. I once really wanted to stay in this family, but now I don’t know why, in the end, I still made the decision to leave the family. I was really immature back then, abandoning everyone at home, letting my relatives who loved me so much get hurt again and again.

”Child, I’m sorry, grandpa didn’t know back then, grandpa made that decision that hurt you, and I hope you can forgive grandpa, okay? You also really didn’t mean it. If time could really turn back, grandpa would definitely choose to stay, to properly come back to your side, to take care of you, letting you receive the care from grandpa and grandma the moment you were born. But in the end, we didn’t give you any care. Maybe you feel deep down that we don’t love you.

But do you know, grandpa and grandma really like you, grandpa and grandma always silently pay attention to your every move because we like you. We all know how hard you train and why you do it, we just never say it aloud. But your every move, grandpa and grandma have been watching closely, seeing you get hurt time and again from training, do you know how much it pains us? Yet because of our relationship with your mom and dad, we really couldn’t come to see you, and we hope you can forgive us...”

Zhang Ni never expected his grandpa would lower himself to speak to him like this. He felt very conflicted inside. Although he didn’t like his grandpa and grandma because they hadn’t been by his side when he needed them, when he saw other kids with their grandparents, he felt so lonely.

Gradually he became numb and didn’t know what kind of life he wanted. Watching other kids with their grandpas and having so much fun, it was true joy, yet they hadn’t matured as much as he did. He already understood so many things at such a young age that other children didn’t. Sometimes he felt proud of this, but recalling those things he said that hurt, what did it all count for in the end? It was just some small things and setbacks.

”I really want to ask, why didn’t my grandparents want to stay by my side? It’s not something I can forgive just because I want to. Maybe you don’t know, every time I went out to play, when I saw other kids holding hands with their grandparents, how envious I was. I hoped my grandparents would treat me the way they were treated, but every time I got home, there was only my mom and dad, and a great-grandfather who treated me the best. I always wondered, where in the world were my grandparents, enjoying their life. Again and again, I prayed, hoping my grandparents would come back to me, even if it was just to take a glance at me.

But every time I went home, I was only met with disappointment. I never saw my grandparents at home waiting to find me. I didn’t even know what my grandparents looked like, so seeing the two of you standing here today, I feel very estranged yet somewhat familiar at the same time. I don’t understand what this feeling is. I know, maybe you had no choice but to leave this home, you must have had your reasons. But did you ever think about coming back to be with us? Whether it was mom and dad or great-grandpa, or even me, we all wanted your company. So why did you never take our feelings into account, always thinking about enjoying yourselves outside?

Even if you didn’t say it, I know these years outside haven’t been happy or satisfactory because the only thing that brings the greatest joy in this world is having family by your side, having family around makes life perfect. I may still be too young to fully understand everything, but I do know some things, I understand that some actions are right, some are wrong, and that once certain things are done, there’s no going back. You once chose to abandon our whole family, the entire family, and the responsibilities that should be borne by the heir of this family. Did you ever think about how desperate he felt at that moment, how much he wished you could live happily in this family, using all his authority just to create a happy place for you, a family life where you had no worries about food and clothing? But your decisions were so heartbreaking to him. He is now elderly, with white hair. When I look at his face, his hair, I feel pain and sadness for him.

Your own son isn’t by your side, but he waited again and again for them to come home and see him, ultimately only being left in despair again and again. How could his heart be at peace with these feelings? None of you ever thought about what his internal feelings were. You always selfishly did what you wanted to do. Did you never truly treat him as family in your heart? That’s not how you treat family. Treating family like this only leaves them wounded and scarred, in the end, you’ll lose these family members!”

”Child, we’re sorry, it’s grandpa and grandma’s fault, why can you understand these things but grandpa and grandma can’t? Maybe it’s because we were too stubbornly biased that everything ended up like this. Sorry, really so sorry, you’ve suffered grievances all these years. Can you forgive grandpa and grandma? If you can forgive us, we’re willing to stay here for the rest of our lives, to take good care of you and make up for all these years to allow you to live happily, okay...”

I hope you can really give me a chance, and not let me go to bed for life with regret, that would be the most painful torture for me.