My Alleged Husband

Chapter 1589: Chapter 1383: Baby

After Zhang Yichen learned that his wife was missing, he felt as though he had fallen into an abyss from which he couldn’t extricate himself. He couldn’t make everything align with his imagined reality; he was terrified that his wife might really leave him like this.

He never thought about what he feared most, let alone how he would become in this lifetime. But now he realized this was all he wanted.

He truly regretted not spending quality time with the woman he loved, which led to her current mysterious disappearance.

What he desired most in his heart now was not money, not benefits, not family, but for his wife to return to his side, for him to see a living person standing in front of him. If that day really came, he might indeed be very, very happy. Maybe that day would come slowly, but he believed that one day, everything he got would be perfect.

”Mom, Grandpa, Dad, Zhihan is missing. I need to rush to the hospital to find him. I can’t let him leave my side; I can’t live without her. You can clearly understand a person who loves another is willing to give everything without expecting anything in return. Sigh, it should be mutual understanding and tolerance between two people.

If two people can’t be honest with each other, can’t live happily together, then even if they live together, they won’t be happy. Their eyes see only benefits, and a marriage based on benefits won’t be happy.

I originally thought I could keep him safely in the hospital, without any accidents, but now I find that’s simply impossible.

My mind is already deranged now, yet how can I feel at ease to leave him alone in the hospital, ignoring him?

I am simply undeserving of being his husband. He went through so much for me, went through numerous hardships to give birth to our child. He endured pains unimaginable to many, and yet I treated him so cruelly, watching him step by step descend into madness and lose everything.

I must admit, sometimes I really hate myself. I hate myself for not truly treating the woman I love, always perfunctory with her, but now realize she’s like this. He’ll no longer be saddened or disappointed by every decision I make. He will only live in his own world, immersed in his own joy, never knowing the pain and disappointment he endured, all caused by me as his husband. I’m truly a failure. I have no right to blame my father for the harm he caused me, nor anyone else for what they did to me, because the blow I dealt to my wife made me deeply understand how helpless a man can be, not knowing what choice to make. I’m scared, constantly scared that all my efforts will turn into nothing.”

”Yichen, you must stop saying these things now. Go find your wife quickly, make sure to bring him back. He is such a kind person; he shouldn’t suffer such pain. He should live happily in his world, undisturbed by anyone. We disrupted all of his life, threw off the rhythm of his life, which caused everything to become like this.

If returning to this home makes him this way, I’d rather never have returned to this home. I don’t want to see you turn into this lost state. Seeing your panic, from your gaze, I feel the fear your father had when I left. He loved me just as you love your wife. From your eyes, I can tell I once hurt a man who loved me deeply. Now I have no right to face him or seek his forgiveness. I can only silently watch everything originally mine slowly leave, everything I once possessed slip away from my grasp.

My life was a mess initially; I have no way to return life to its original state. Is it really possible to remain true to one’s original intention? I’ve forgotten what my original intention was; I’m numb. I’ve made decisions not everyone could make, I’ve given up everything. Now it’s time for divine retribution, reminding me of the pain I caused those who loved me and the suffering.

I’ve never seen you so panicked, not even when we left you that day. You remained composed. You suffered, but never, like now, with fear in your eyes. From your eyes, I deeply see how great a man’s love for his wife is, willing to sacrifice everything. You’re such a good man, so perfect. Having you as my child makes me immensely proud. I can go out and tell the world I have the most perfect son, who is a perfect man, excelling in both family and career, standing at life’s pinnacle for many years without falling.”

Zhang Yichen is truly in a panic now; he’s gone mad searching for his wife’s shadow everywhere. But after searching repeatedly up and down the streets, he couldn’t find her. He grows increasingly afraid, fearing any mishap might occur to that person. He can’t bear to endure such a blow again. Everything has changed, for him, what he wants is just so simple.

Why is it that when he is just about to grasp the happiness he yearns for, everything changes, becoming chaotic, becoming so despairing?

What did he do wrong to make heaven treat him so cruelly, again and again, making him experience the kind of pain that feels powerless yet inevitable?