World’s Cutest Alchemist

After avoiding a very life-threatening accident, Luna sat in the chair at my desk facing me. Her legs were crossed and she was showing a very demure demeanor. You’d have never guessed just a few minutes ago she almost had an accident.

I, on the other hand, sat criss-cross on my bed with a blanket draped around my shoulders.

It looked like Luna was contemplating her words, so I didn’t disturb her.

Instead, I thought about how well I slept. I didn’t know if it was because someone was by my side or if it was specifically because Luna was by my side that I was able to sleep comfortably.

Either way, this would be a problem. If I needed someone by my side every night to sleep, that wouldn’t only inconvenience me but also Luna.

Is there a potion that drives away nightmares? I wondered.

There were plenty of sleep aid potions out there, so, there should be one that forcibly stops dreams and nightmares, right?

Mm…

I sat in thought for a few moments. Having to take a potion every time before bed…I didn’t like it.

But, what other choice did I have?

My fist unconsciously clenched underneath my legs.

But before the silence could linger for longer, Luna finally spoke up.

“So, this is your room, huh?” She asked, curiously looking around. Her eyes lingered on the mouse plush on my bed for a few moments as a smile drew onto her face before her eyes were drawn elsewhere.

“Yep!” I said with a smile, my previous thoughts completely fading into the wind, “Ah! I’m not even being a proper host! Let me show you around!”

I quickly got to my feet.

“Mm…? Ah, I’m still wearing my alchemy attire.” I was still wearing the oversized coat. Now it’s going to be all wrinkly…I’ll have to iron it out later.

“…Is that actually your outfit when you brew potions?” Luna asked.

“Of course! Well, I’m missing a few parts but it’s mainly accurate!” I replied with pride, “Hold on just one sec, I’ll show you the full fit!”

“Wait, no, you don’t need-” Luna’s voice faded into the air as I entered my closet and shut the door.

I have a confession to make.

I haven’t been wearing the witch’s hat…

It’s just inconvenient! I haven’t lost my alchemist’s spirit nor have I changed! It’s just super hot when I wear it!

It’s just so sweaty! So…I just kind of stopped wearing it recently…A few weeks ago is recent, right?

As for the glasses…I kind of lost them?

But! At least I still have the lab coat, right?

Anyways, I put on my hat and looked at myself in the mirror. I definitely looked better than I did this morning.

My top and pants didn’t really matter, so I just stuck with the dolphin shorts and tee I was already wearing.

“Mm…Nice.” I did a little twirl in front of the full-body mirror.

Now that I think about it, didn’t I look more like an alchemist with the haggard look earlier? Don’t I just look like I’m cosplaying now…?

Whatever!

Stepping out of the closet, I saw Luna checking out my PC setup.

“Ahem!” I cleared my throat to make my presence known and struck a pose.

Luna turned to me and tilted her head.

“This is your work attire?” She asked.

“Yes!” I replied smugly.

“…You just put on a hat?”

“…”

“…”

“Ahem, I didn’t want to change my shirt or shorts, so just imagine me with a skirt, shirt, and stockings with a garter belt.”

She stared at me in silence for a moment.

“…And you dress up in that attire every time you do alchemy?”

“…” I didn’t answer and just looked away.

Okay…I admit it. Other than the lab coat, I don’t change anything about what I wear when I do alchemy. If I’m wearing shorts and a wifebeater, that’s the work fit. If I’m wearing joggers and a hoodie, that’s the work fit…

“The lab coat looks good though, right!?” I looked at her with earnest eyes.

“It’s wrinkly.”

“Gah! Just compliment me!” I glared at her.

“Heh.”

“Whatever.” I jutted my lips and crossed my arms.

Snap!

I looked at the source of the sudden noise—her phone.

“I charge for photos now.” I furrowed my brows and glared at her.

“Oh? How much?” She asked with an amused smile.

“One compliment per.”

“Hm…Do you do refunds?”

“Gah!!” I stormed up to her and tried to look as menacing as possible.

Snap!

“Pay up!” I said.

“What if I don’t want to?” She asked, tilting her head.

“Then you’re a thief!”

“Are you going to report me?”

“Thieves get locked up.”

“And how are you going to lock me up?”

“Heh.” I smirked before jumping onto her and wrapping my arms around her tightly, “You’re not going anywhere now.”

Luna seemed to tense up and freeze.

“What? Raccoon got your tongue?” I teased.

Leaning back to look at her frozen expression, I knew what I had to do.

Snatching her phone from her hand, I quickly snapped a photo. It was unfortunate that my phone was still on my bed.

Snap!

The photo noise seemed to bring her back to reality as she shook her head and glared at me.

“You took a photo with my own phone!?”

“And…Send!” I said, tapping the button.

From my bed, a text tone rang out, indicating I received the goods safely.

“You!” She snatched the phone from my hand and looked over the photo.

In the picture, Luna had wide open eyes and a slightly open mouth, she looked extremely surprised and a faint red could be seen on her cheeks.

“Hehe.” I giggled, happily retreating to grab my own phone.

…

“Ahem, we got a little off-topic.” I said, “Follow me, I’ll give you a tour!~” I hummed as Luna stood up and followed me.

“First! This is obviously my bedroom and where I sleep!” I said, presenting the room with spread arms like I was some sort of magician who just finished showing off a magic trick, “I don’t have a separate bedroom or gaming room like you do, so I also keep my PC setup in here. It’s nothing fancy and a bit outdated, but since I don’t play much resource-intensive games, it works well.”

“Mhm.” Luna nodded, “I’m a little surprised that you haven’t decorated your room more. Other than the plushies, you don’t have much?”

My room was pretty bland. For decor, I only had a few shelves of plushies, two figurines, and a few posters of my favorite albums.

“Well…” I scratched the back of my head, “Until recently, I’ve been pretty broke so I haven’t been able to spend on decor. And even now that I have money, I need to spend on materials and my garden. Plus, I’m saving up for a cauldron, so…”

“No, no, I completely get it. You just have more important priorities. I wasn’t able to decorate my place until just this year.”

“Yeah, you get it.” I nodded, “So, as you can see, I keep most of my plush’s on the shelves.” I pointed at the wall, “They’re all stuff my parents gave me when I was younger, so I keep them around.”

“I see. And you keep the mouse one on the bed?”

“Mhm, my most important one.”

“Ah-” Luna tensed up and quickly averted her gaze back to a shelf, “That’s uh- why do you have…?”

She was pointing at my shelf full of bottles.

“Mm?” I tilted my head, “Just alcohol?” I said and shrugged.

“You drink?” She asked, looking at me.

“When I was in school I did. I haven’t since I graduated though.”

“Oh, why’d you start?”

“Just because?” I shrugged, “No real reason--just thought it was cool.”

“Wow, you criminal.” Luna clicked her tongue and shook her head.

“That’s right, I’m a big bad criminal.” I smiled, “Are you going to lock me up?” I teased.

“Ahem, so, what’s next?” Luna quickly said.

“Hehe,” I giggled before continuing with the tour, “That’s my closet over there, just a bunch of clothes in there. Leaving the bedroom we go straight to the living room and kitchen, over there is the bathroom door, as you know. The living room doesn’t have much, just a couch and TV.”

“Quite minimalistic, aren’t you?”

“Nah, just broke.”

“Fair.”

“Should I show you the garden or kitchen first?” I asked.

“Let’s leave the kitchen for last.” Luna replied.

I nodded and led her to the door to the garden.

“Here’s where a big chunk of my points go to.” I said, opening the door and letting Luna look around first.

“Wow…” She murmured in amazement, “There’s so much…”

“Mm,” I nodded, “I’m really happy with it.”

Inside, I began explaining the different plants and materials there were. Luna listened with intrigue, nodding along and happily asking questions along the way.

“—And these, these are the source of the famous strawberries you like so much.” I presented the bush with a puffed-out chest.

I still only had one C+ grade bush for now, but it did its job well.

“Woah…” Luna looked at the bush with almost reverent eyes.

“I’m working on getting the other bushes up to grade.”

Luna nodded and I could practically see the drool pooling in her mouth. Understandably too, since the bush had fruited.

“Would you like to pick some?” I asked.

She immediately snapped her head toward me,

“R-really? Is that okay?” She asked with a trembling gaze, I could see she was holding herself back.

“Of course.” I smiled and paused before my brilliant mind kicked into gear, “You just have to pay a small fee.”

“…What’s the fee?”

“One compliment please.”

“…”

“…”

“…Are you a compliment ghost or something?”

“Yes, now extend my time on this earth.”

“Haah…So shameless…” Luna sighed and a mouse-like voice came out as quiet as a whisper, “…You always smell really good—like strawberries…”

“Huuuuh? What was that?” I leaned in and cupped my ear, “Say that again?”

“No! I already paid up!” She quickly shook her head.

“Ah, that’s okay, I recorded it after all.” I said with a teasing smile and showed her my phone.

She looked at me with a trembling gaze as I played the audio clip.

“Mm…?” I tilted my head, “Are you sniffing me? Do I smell that good to you~?” I teasingly asked, stepping closer.

When she didn’t say anything, I simply stepped back and smiled,

“I do use strawberry-scented shampoo and conditioner. I really like the smell of it too.”

“Ahem, is there a specific way I need to pick the strawberries?” She avoided my gaze and looked at the bush.

I crouched down next to the bush and signaled for her to do the same, once she did, I demonstrated as I spoke,

“You have to be gentle with them,” I said, “First, you need to make sure they’re ripe. Look at their tips and if it’s white, they’re not ready. If they’re fully red like this one, then they are. When you confirm that, gently grab the stem around here and twist and pull.”

I showed her a perfectly plucked strawberry.

“Then! You can just~ Nom!” I bit into the juicy strawberry, letting the flavor explode in my mouth.

“Mm! So good.” I trembled.

Luna looked at me with jealous eyes before she started to inspect a strawberry.

“This one is fine?” She asked.

“Mm.” I nodded.

Luna gently picked it from the stem just as I did before biting into it.

A look of pure bliss appeared on her face from the sweetness.

Snap!

She probably didn’t even hear the photo noise since she just continued to quickly nibble away at the strawberry.

I smiled at the sight before continuing to bite at my own strawberry.

It really is sweet.