World’s Cutest Alchemist

Well, the reason was quite obvious. An alchemist suddenly hit the leaderboards. Honestly, that alone would have only caused some stir, but I think the real problem was the fact my Dynokali potion was shown.

Even I could tell how valuable this potion is. Whether it’s used for good or bad reasons depends entirely on me. Which is exactly why people are trying to find me for answers.

Not that I had any intention of letting them know anything.

I mean, I’m practically unfindable as long as the anonymous mode function is on…

“Eh…?”

I shuddered as I read through a post accurately explaining my appearance.

They got my height, awakening time, and age all from one video.

Should I be worried?

If an 18 second video gave that much information, how much would a longer video give? I was sure I could hit the leaderboards until my dynokali potion lost effectiveness. But that’d give them more identifiable factors.

Wait, I showed the gallery that video too, surely they didn’t get this much information, right?

No, wouldn’t they have gotten even more…? Those misters are old and skilled with hundreds of years of experience.

“Hm…”

I rubbed my upper arms with both hands and shivered.

“I’ll just pretend that they learned nothing.”

I nodded happily to that conclusion.

It’d be too embarrassing to troll otherwise.

…

[Btw, didn’t Bin look kind of young?]

Author: Juxtaps

It probably wasn’t intentional, but they definitely revealed a lot of information about themselves that they’ve kept hidden until now.

They looked pretty short and covered their ears all cutely with both hands.

It’s funny to think this is the same person who posts stuff like [Saw some amazing tits today!] and it’s just a picture of two small birds.

→ [Love Fusion Mix Hands: Yeah, my baby is so cute and tiny. ^^]

→ [EfficiencyLord: Based on the height and long hair, either someone young or a dwarf, I’d reckon the former.]

→ [ObsidianTier: I thought we were raising an alchemist, instead, we’re raising a child.]

→ [HomunculusTheBest: Is this…what parenthood is like? Bin! I’ll teach you all about homunculus!]

→ [SlimeLube: Slime is a perfect material to use at their age!]

→ [Meditation Is Medicine: Meditation is great for young minds.]

→ [✪Potions Are Easy: Alright, everyone, settle down. Let’s not speculate about the newbie’s identity, they’ll find it uncomfortable. Delete this post and just keep the thoughts in your minds.]

[This post has been deleted.]

…

“Hm…” I pondered for a little, “Should I make the video private?”

That was the most surefire way to keep my identity hidden. If I did that, there would be literally no way to know who I am.

Even the rank 1 ‘Anonymous’ person keeps their clears hidden. And no one even knows their gender.

But…

[Points - 271,208]

The points were just too good to pass up.

To watch someone’s clear video, you had to pay 100 points. The uploader gets 8% of that. It’s literally free income!

My video had already been watched just over 24,000 times now. And I’ve made over 196,000 points.

Alchemy is expensive! I need all the income I can get…

“Haah…” I sighed.

It’s fine, now that I know how to properly use the potions, I’ll be better at hiding myself.

Those stalkers can look all they want, but they’ll never find out who I am!

…

“Raccoon’s nationality is American.” A man reported.

“Good,” He nodded, “Have we searched through the database for recent alchemist awakeners?”

“We’re still in the process of searching.”

“Alright, let me know if you find anything.”

…

I rolled around in bed, hugging my pillow.

Really, lazing around is the best.

Especially on a cool, windy day with the window open.

“Ah…I want to photosynthesize.”

I wonder if there’s an alchemist skill related to photosynthesis? Can I bask in sunlight and let the warm rays fuel my body?

The sound of the birds chirping felt like music to my ears.

But, reluctantly, it was time to get up.

It’s already been two days since I cleared the first floor.

I’ve just been relaxing. No potions, no games, just tending to the plants and basking in sunlight.

I made up with the gallery too. Everyone was surprisingly nice and accepting when I posted my thanks for letting me know my mistakes.

Though, it’s a bit concerning that they comment weird things under my troll posts…

[Finally decided to use slime…]

Author: BinLover

Jk lolololol

→ [SlimeLube: You bastard!!!]

→ [Love Fusion Mix Hands: Haha, that’s super funny, cutie.]

→ [Juxtaps: LOL! This is so funny.]

Something had happened with them, but I just couldn’t put my finger on it.

Well, whatever. At least Slime reacts funnily.

Heading to my gardening room, I happily hummed as I watered the plants. Even the new huffpall was settling in nicely.

“Grow! Grow! Grow up big and strong!~”

Suddenly, a screen popped up in front of me.

“Eek!” I flinched hard, nearly dropping my watering can.

[Your ‘Plant Growth’ skill has ranked up!]

[Plant Growth] - Rank D (Bronze)

Accelerates the growth rate of plants.

* Applies a small quality buff to plants.

After putting my hand on my chest and calming down, I read my skill with widened eyes.

“Wow…Hehe!” I burst out into an ear-to-ear smile.

I didn’t know that skills could rank up from ways other than a tower reward. But, thinking about it, it makes sense. I guess two months of active use of a skill does pay off.

It’s a shame that it’s extremely vague though. “Applies a small quality buff.” Like, what’s considered small? Will it change plants from F rank to E rank? What about if I keep using it on a single plant, could I get a plant to S rank?

I guess that’s part of the fun—experimenting with your skill and finding out how it works.

Enough thinking about it, might as well just put it to use.

“Grow! Grow! Grow up big, healthy and strong!~”

I decided to change the lyrics a bit to match the changed skill. I could definitely feel more of my mana being used.

But…Did anything actually change?

It didn’t seem like it, all the ranks were the same as before.

“Hm…Maybe I should properly experiment with control groups and stuff like that.”

Memories of my middle school science class came to mind.

I knew the proper ways and methods to conduct research, but until now I haven’t felt the actual need to do it.

But if I could raise my plant’s ranks higher, that’d be worthwhile.

And I’m quite impulsive. So, I immediately ordered some planter boxes and soil to be delivered.

I also bought some rank C soil from the exchange.

There were multiple things I wanted to test. If I was going to research, I was going to do it big.

…

It took a two hours for the planter boxes and soil to arrive. Thank God for delivery, am I right?

Anyways, I placed six planter boxes in two groups of three.

Let’s call them Group A and Group B.

Group A would use regular soil and Group B would use the C rank soil.

For both groups, one planter box will only be watered without the use of my skill. Another will be affected by my skill once a day. And the final plant will have my skill used on it multiple times a day.

I decided to plant strawberries. For no particular reason other than I’d like to eat high grade ones.

“Alright, all planned out!” I nodded happily and got to work.

…

Since this would be a long-running experiment, after planting them I had nothing else to do.

Making potions could be fun, but I felt like I needed at least another day of rest.

So, I hopped on the computer.

Rather than the usual single-player game, I opened a game that I hadn’t played since before I awakened.

An MMORPG game called ‘Shadows of Freest’. It wasn’t a particularly popular game, yet, I found it fun.

[BinLover has logged on!]

It looked exactly as I remembered it.

“Hm…What should I do though?” I tilted my head.

Before, I’d play every day and faithfully do my dailies. Now, I didn’t really care about doing them.

[ElectricTypeMouse > BinLover: You didn’t quit????]

A friend from the same guild messaged me.

We started playing the game around the same time, so it felt nice to see them still on. I also felt kind of bad that I suddenly stopped playing.

We used to do dungeons together almost every day…

[BinLover > ElectricTypeMouse: No lol. Sorry, I awakened and had to deal with that hassle and stuff.]

[ElectricTypeMouse: Really??? Congrats. What class are you?]

[BinLover: Alchemist ^^ Professional potion maker at your service.]

[ElectricTypeMouse: Nice~ Production classes make a lot of money. But do you have time to play? Don’t alchemists spend all day researching in a dark room? Lol.]

[BinLover: Woah, woah, woah, not true! I like bright rooms ;P]

[BinLover: Plenty of time! I’m self-employed so I can do whatever I want lol.]

[ElectricTypeMouse: Self-employed = Jobless, got it lololol]

[BinLover: >:(]

[ElectricTypeMouse: jkjk, wanna duo dungeon?]

[BinLover: ye, let’s run graveyard.]

“Hehe…” I softly giggled. Although talking to my alchemist friends was fun, talking to a real friend had a different type of joy to it.

I should definitely start playing this game often again, if not only to talk with my friend.

…

[BinLover: Is this…good? Got it on the first try.]

[ElectricTypeMouse: Agh!!! You bastard!!]

[BinLover: Hehe! Jkjk, you should take it.]

[ElectricTypeMouse: Really? Are you sure?]

[BinLover: Yeah, lol, not a mage anyway, this staff is useless to me.]

[ElectricTypeMouse: tyty :)]

…

A few hours later, I closed the game and stretched my arms wide.

That was more fun than I remember.

The game itself was fun, but I think the back and forth with my friend elevated it to a whole nother level.

Hm…Am I lonely?

It’s been over two months since I’ve had a proper conversation with someone—My alchemist friends don’t count.

“Well, whatever.” I shook my head. No use thinking about it.

I’m just too lazy to go out and make friends. It’s not that I can’t.

“Let’s see…Tomorrow, I should brew some potions to sell.”

…

I decided on brewing some concentration potions. The cheapest one’s I could find on the exchange were C rank and went for 40,000 points.

The ones I can concoct, however, are E+ rank. Though a little worse than the ones on the exchange, I felt like they’ll sell well.

And since I’m the only one selling them, I can set the price! The only way I’d lose money is if they don’t sell!

And…Not to brag, but even days after my floor clear, people were still mentioning me in the gallery. Many people were trying to buy my potions, whether it be to try and break down the materials used or otherwise, that didn’t matter to me.

I’m still only making crude potions by the alchemy gallery standards.

Steal the recipe if you want! Just give me plenty of money while your at it!

Later, when I get off of this ‘crude’ potion stage, I’ll implement security measures in my recipes, but for now, I literally don’t care.

Each concentration potion cost 6,500 in material cost, and I’m a ‘go big or go home’ type of person, so I bought 250,000 points worth or 38 potions.

I planned to sell them for 20,000 points each on the exchange. I’ll triple my point balance!

“Hehe!” I giggled evilly.

I even bought a proper alchemist outfit to wear: An oversized white lab coat, glasses, and a witch’s hat!

It felt like my potions grade will be boosted by one while wearing this.

Of course, that’s the placebo effect talking, but does that matter!? All I need is confidence!

[Concentration Potion]

Grade - D

Creator: Raccoon

Increases your concentration.

* Last for 45 Minutes

“Eh…?” I stared at the completed potion.

Why did the grade get boosted?