World’s Cutest Alchemist

Over the next few days, the testers sent over their results in the group chat. Amelia had sent a video of her arrows bouncing off the walls and hitting target dummies; Robert sent a video of him jumping off a ten foot tall basketball rim onto the ground. When he landed, instead of buckling his knees, he simply bounced off of the ground like it was a trampoline. He did note that it doesn’t completely cancel out the fall damage, but, it can mitigate it a little.

It was really interesting seeing how people used their bouncy potions. What I liked the most though was Pearl’s video. She had sent a video of young kids bouncing random objects and playing catch with them; Apparently, in her free time she works at an orphanage. She had asked beforehand if she was allowed to show it to the kids, I didn’t even have to think about the answer. That was the point of the potion in the first place, having a fun time making things bouncy. So, technically every other use case is unintended.

That doesn’t mean I dislike seeing them used for combat or utility though. It was amazing seeing Amelia’s arrows bounce off of walls to hit targets that would otherwise be covered.

Overall, it seems like everyone likes the potion though. The only negative feedback I’ve gotten is the duration, and, I can’t really change that without overhauling the recipe.

On another note, I’m almost out of bottles…I only have just under half remaining.

But! If we look at the positive side, when I run out of bottles, I can hang out with Luna. Some more good news is that the loot from the gate is almost ready; Luna and I can go grab our materials in just a few hours. I don’t exactly know how it works, but, from what I understand, the association posts a job for people to butcher, clean, or do whatever they need to do to the materials.

It’s too much stuff for a little alchemist like me to remember! All I need to do is brew potions and sell them! Any association stuff can be handled by Ashley!

For now though, I’ll just chill and make some more bouncy potions until it’s time to go.

…

Luna parked the car in front of the association building.

“They don’t have a separate building for this?” I asked.

“They have warehouses to store the materials,” Luna said, “But, I think they prepare them here.”

“Hm, I see.” I nodded, “And we don’t need Ashley for this?” I asked.

“No, we’re basically just in and out. After you pick out the materials you reserved, we’re done here.”

“Then, would it be possible to send someone here on our behalf—a professional, and they pick out the best materials and just exchange them over to us?” I asked.

“If you want to pay the trade fee, that’s certainly possible. Plus, you’ll also have to sign them in.”

What!? You’re telling me there’s a hidden fee I’ve been paying when I’ve been trading!? Why didn’t I know about this? How many points have I unknowingly lost?!

“There’s a trade fee?” I asked, baffled.

“…Yeah,” Luna nodded after a moment, “The price depends on the distance between each other. If one person’s here in Florida, and the other is in, I don’t know, Germany, you’ll lose close to 100,000 points?”

“WHAT?!” I shouted.

“You didn’t know? How? The tower says it when you go to trade.”

“This can’t be true.” I said confidently and took off my mask.

[Would you like to send ElectricTypeMouse a trade?]

[Yes]

[You give: [Black Domino Mask].]

[You receive: Nothing]

“…” Luna looked at me incredulously, “Well?”

“I don’t see it!” I said, “You’re lying to me!”

[ElectricTypeMouse has accepted the trade!]

[A trade fee of 500 points has been deducted from your account.]

[The item(s) will be transferred in 3…2…1.]

The domino mask disappeared from my hand and appeared in Luna’s hand.

Stolen content warning: this tale belongs on NovelPhoenix. Report any occurrences elsewhere.

Luna inspected the mask for a second before putting it on,

“Hey, do you like my new mask?” She asked.

“My 500 points!” I cried out, “It only tells you after the trade is completed?!”

“If you initiate the trade, then yes, but, if you don’t then it tells you beforehand. Look.”

[ElectricTypeMouse has initiated a trade!]

[You receive: [Black Domino Mask].]

[You give: Nothing]

[Y/N]

“Where is it?” I asked, looking at the trade screen. After a moment, I spotted it.

[Trade Fee: 500 Points.]

“WAH!” I let out.

It was hidden in plain sight! The sneaky thing! Just below the main text, the trade fee was listed in tiny font! It’s like the tower was trying to hide it from you!

Honestly, the only reason I haven’t seen it before was probably because I wasn’t paying attention or was distracted by other things, but! Let’s be real for a second, the tower is out to get me and make me waste all my money! That’s the true reason it’s written like the fine print in a scam contract!

[Trade Denied.]

[Trade has been canceled.]

“My points…Sniff, sniff.” I sniffled.

“Pfft,” Luna chuckled, “Why do you say ‘sniff, sniff’ before actually sniffing?”

“For fun?” I tilted my head.

“Ah, unsurprising.” Luna smiled.

“Say, why does it only tell you the trade fee after the trade is accepted when you initiate it but not when you don’t?” I asked.

“Because it can be used to locate you.” Luna said, “You see how the trade between us only took 500 points? That’s because we’re close to each other, but, if I was in, I don’t know…Boca, then it’d be like 2,000 points or something.”

“Oh,” My eyes widened, “Then, would the association have used that to find me if I were a bit more secretive?

“Maybe?” Luna shrugged, “It’d be a shot in the dark though, considering that it’s basic information. They would’ve assumed that you knew that logic and would’ve probably been completely shocked that you actually accepted the trade.”

“Hm…But, what if I accepted the trade while I’m nowhere close to where I live, like in Arizona or something?”

“No clue, that’s probably accounted for. I’m not exactly an tracking expert.”

“You’re right,” I nodded, “I should ask the stalker mister himself.”

“Haha,” Luna chuckled, “Can’t wait to see how that goes.”

Luna opened her door and stepped out.

I didn’t do the same immediately, instead, grabbing a container of icebreakers that were in the glove box.

“Hm…Well, might as well try?” I mumbled and initiated a trade.

[Would you like to send Anonymous a trade?]

[Yes]

[You give: Icebreaker Mints.]

[You receive: 100,000 Points]

I chuckled and went to open the passenger door but froze.

[Anonymous has accepted your trade!]

[A trade fee of 20,000 points has been deducted from your account.]

[The item(s) will be transferred in 3…2…1.]

[You have received 100,000 points!]

“…” My jaw dropped to the floor and the mints disappeared from my hand.

W-What the heck!? Why’d he accept it!? I mean, +80,000 points easy? Did I just find an infinite money glitch?

“My mints!” Luna exclaimed, she must’ve sensed them disappear with that broken trait of hers, “Where’d my mints go!?”

“Uh…They’re gone.” I said.

“Yeah, I can tell, but where!?”

“Um…I traded them.”

“Why!? My mints!!” She cried out, “They were the good ones too! Sniff, sniff!” She pouted.

“Well, uh, how about this.” I said, “I’ll buy you two packs on the way back! Of your choice!”

“Hm…Fine.” She agreed after a moment, “Who’d you even trade them to? What’d you get?”

“Well, I’ll tell you what I got first: 100,000 points.” I said.

“What!? 100,000 points? For icebreaker mints you can get for like two bucks at the store?!” She exclaimed, baffled.

“Yep,” I nodded, “A pretty good trade, no? I could buy like 500 of those icebreakers for that amount.”

“That’s a great trade,” Luna nodded, “Wait…You’re using the money from my mints to buy me more mints!?”

“Ahem,” I cleared my throat and whistled while looking away.

“Hey!”

“Wonderful weather we’re having.” I quietly said.

“Pfft, fine,” Luna chuckled, “Well, who’s the sucker that spent that much on a half-eaten container of mints?”

“Ah, it’s no one special. Just one of my good—no, great friends. You know, me and this guy, we’re tight like that.” I waved it off.

“So? Who is it?” Luna asked again.

“You may have or may not have heard of him, he’s an rising newcomer.”

“Ah! Stop tiptoeing around the subject and just tell me!” Luna shot me a glare.

“Hehe,” I giggled, “Yeah, it’s just my good friend, Anonymous.”

“Huh?” Luna let out, “W-Wait, wait, could you repeat that?”

“Yeah,” I stretched my arms and said nonchalantly, “Just my good friend Anonymous. We go way back.”

“WHAT!?” Luna shouted, “You’re telling me, Anonymous just gave you 100,000 points for that half-empty container of icebreakers!? Wait he even traded with you in the first place!?”

“Yep, it’s not that big of a deal. Us superstars are just chill with one another like that.”

“…I give up. I don’t want to know.” Luna eventually dropped the subject, “Well, let’s go.”

Pfft! I internally giggled.

Honestly, I’m just as flabbergasted as she is. I have no idea why that guy would accept my trade. Truth be told, I did it just for fun, Luna said that it can be used to track someone so I thought I’d mess around a little bit. But I wasn’t expecting him to actually accept it!

I know that apparently, he has fought other awakeners before, so, he’s not completely unknown. But, from what I can tell, only a handful of people have seen him! I wonder if he’s just rich enough to not care about spending 100,000 points on my(?) icebreakers, or if he thought they were some hidden item I created.

In any case, now I know that he’s only 20,000 points away in terms of distance! I’m curious if that’s where he lives or if he was traveling for some reason.

Regardless, it has nothing to do with me. I’m happy with my free 80,000 point profit and he’s probably happy with his icebreakers. It’s a win-win!

Stepping out of the car, I readjusted my mask. It was mostly to confirm that I did, in fact, put it back on after Luna returned it to me. Really, it’s hard to tell because of the weightless modifier.

“Say, do you think if I dyed my hair silver and you dyed yours blonde, we’d be able to swap places and the association wouldn’t be able to tell?” I asked, grabbing Luna’s hand and interlocking our fingers.

“Hm…Maybe? It might work if we’re facing someone who’s never run into us before, but, I think anyone who has seen us would be able to tell.”

She’s right. From an outside perspective, Luna has that cold and aloof look while I’m just cute and vibrant.

“Such a shame,” I mumbled, “Could’ve been a fun prank.”

Luna shrugged as we entered the building.

“Basically, we tell the receptionist, give them a few details and then someone will lead us to the loot.” Luna explained.

“Sounds simple enough~,” I nodded, “To the receptionist!”

…

The man looked at the half-full container of icebreaker mints in his palm. The packaging was primarily green with a white border.

Across the center of it was the word: ‘Icebreakers’ and just above that was an image of a watermelon.

“…Why’d she trade me icebreakers?” The man mumbled questioningly, scrutinizing the container.

At first he thought it was an accident—that she had sent it to the wrong person. But then he thought, who the hell would spend 100,000 points on icebreakers?

As it turns out, he would.

It wasn’t even the full amount either, just over half of them were missing.

One of the reasons he accepted the trade was because maybe, just maybe, when the Little Bomber was more experienced and skilled, she could cure him. She has already proved that she’s talented in alchemy with those dynokali and bouncy potions. So, he figured there was nothing wrong with gaining some goodwill with her. It’s only 100,000 points after all.

Plus, he was genuinely interested in those bouncy potions. If they worked the way he thought they did, he could easily find some use cases for them in gates or the tower. Perhaps, she’d send one to him as a gift?

He chuckled, remembering her online antics. Even if she couldn’t cure him, she didn’t seem like a bad person to befriend.

The only other hope for curing his poison was the girl named ‘Bin’, who had disappeared months ago after the tower event. Unfortunately, all he knew was her appearance, even after searching, he couldn’t find her.

The man opened the container and popped an icebreaker into his mouth.

“Hm…Watermelon.” He mumbled, chewing. First came the cold, refreshing feeling spreading throughout his mouth. The deliciousness of the watermelon flavor followed.

“…These are pretty good.” He said, popping another one into his mouth.