World’s Cutest Alchemist

“Hehehe!” I giggled as I read through the replies to my newest post.

“Haah…You couldn’t help yourself? Could you?” Luna sighed.

We were still on the way home, but, as she said, I couldn’t help but troll a little.

“You couldn’t have at least waited until we were home?” Luna asked.

“Nope~!” I replied with a smile, “Hehe!”

[Raccoon: visited the association lol (picture of association building) it was quite nice. Also saw the Steel Gators building (picture of Steel Gators logo).]

→ [Oh my goodness, she’s making fun of the association. She just directly posted her location out of the blue. I kneel, Little Bomber, no troll shall ever reach your level.]

→ [Steel Gators!! We’re making it to world’s this year!!!]

↳ [Shut up, fan boy. White Rose sweeps the gators.]

↳ [Screw you! White Rose? More like Wilted Rose, your team hasn’t been good in years!]

↳ [Lololol, you’re both idiots. Principality of Clockwork is winning the league this year.]

↳ [Dumbass, your shitty team got annihilated by our SG earlier this year.]

→ [Wait, she’s literally just revealed her location. Let’s not skip past this. Steel Gators building plus the association can only be found in South Florida. How long ago was this photo?]

↳ [Artist class here, photo is recent…Today recent…Minutes ago recent.]

↳ [PFFT!]

↳ [LOLOLOL]

↳ [She does not have a single care in the world LMAOOO]

↳ [It could be a photo someone took for her, this doesn’t necessarily have to be Raccoon taking the picture.]

↳ [Raccoon: Still in the car, driving home lol]

↳ [PFFT!]

↳ [LOLOL]

↳ [Hey! Stop texting while driving!!!]

↳ [Raccoon: I’m a pretty, passenger princess; not driving.]

↳ [??? Raccoon seems a bit chatty today.]

→ [So, hold on a second, you’re telling me. Little Bomber, the anonymous unregistered awakener who hasn’t revealed themselves for months and has the whole world searching for them, suddenly decides to post a photo of their location? In which, they only took minutes ago?]

↳ [Sounds about right?]

↳ [Little Bomber is the true queen, I kneel.]

→ [Wait, I’m at the association right now. You’re telling me I could’ve seen the Little Bomber in person?]

↳ [Me too!? Hold on, did she hear me making a joke about her!?]

↳ [Run dude, you’re gonna get blown up. LOLOLOL]

↳ [Raccoon: I did hear someone talking about how they threw a lizard into a horde and it exploded.]

↳ [AHHHHH! THAT WAS ME!!!]

↳ [Raccoon: Run.]

↳ [!]

↳ [I’M SORRY!!!]

↳ [LOLOLOLOL]

↳ [LOLOLOLOLOL]

→ [Steel Gators Official: Oh! If you were here, you should’ve let us know! We would have given you a tour! Some of our members really want to meet you! Next time you stop by, please let us know!]

↳ [Raccoon: Go Gators!]

↳ [Little Bomber is an SG Fan!?!?]

↳ [NOOOOO! Why like such a terrible team!!?]

↳ [My world has collapsed.]

↳ [From now on, an attack on Raccoon is an attack on me!!! Let’s go!!! SG on top!!]

→ [Why the sudden reveal? Are you finally going public?]

Unlawfully taken from NovelPhoenix, this story should be reported if seen on Amazon.

“You…” Luna let out, “Haah…So, are you actually going to reveal yourself?” She asked.

“Mm?” I tilted my head, “Reveal? As in bluntly expose my face to everyone? No,” I shook my head, “But, an open secret? That’s fine. Not like I can hide it for much longer anyway.”

“If that’s your choice.” Luna nodded, “But, even if the association finds you, they’re not gonna suddenly expose your identity, you know?”

“Blah!” I stuck my tongue out, “If one person knows, everyone knows. Plus, hiding it so much is inconvenient.”

“Pfft, if you’re acting like this, then I guess I don’t have to worry about it.” Luna chuckled.

“Hmph, instead of worrying about me…Hehe…” I giggled and started to write another Tawer post.

[Raccoon: Went to Rapturous World yesterday, it was pretty fun. Had a great time in Reality World. And took a nice photo at the machine, wonder when that’ll leak.]

→ [Another post so soon!? And it’s just another post exposing herself!?]

↳ [LMAO! After that floor 5 clear, she can do anything she wants. She has more followers than some rankers and every guild wants their hands on her right now.]

↳ [Yeah, and her hype isn’t artificially created either. It was made through proven effort and results.]

→ [No, no, no doesn’t anyone else see the signs? We should be worried…For some reason, it seems like her chains have been destroyed, the Little Bomber has been set loose!]

↳ [LOLOLOL! What kind of copypasta is this?!]

↳ [What in the anime plot…]

↳ [He has a point though, Raccoon suddenly becoming chatty? I wonder what’s up.]

→ [You too!? I was there! Could we have passed by each other?]

→ [Why’d you go there?]

↳ [Raccoon: For fun~]

↳ [I don’t know about anyone else, but if I was a theme park and someone known as the Little Bomber visited for ‘fun’, I’d be concerned.]

↳ [LOLOLOL]

↳ [LMAO!?]

↳ [WAIT, WHY IS THIS SO TRUE?]

↳ [UM!!! Rapturous World staff, please inspect the park!!!]

↳ [Raccoon: (Glaring Raccoon Icon)]

↳ [LOLOLOLOL]

→ [Hey! Since you’re in a good mood, why don’t you tell us what happens to the bouncy ball?]

→ [Any info on when you’re selling the bouncy bouncy potions? It’s been months…]

↳ [Raccoon: Soon~]

↳ [Soon? How soon? Last time you said ‘Soon’ and we still haven’t gotten them]

↳ [Raccoon: Sooon~]

↳ [Sooon? How sooon? Last time you said ‘Soon’ and we still haven’t gotten them]

↳ [Raccoon: Soooon~]

↳ [??? Am I in a time loop or something?]

↳ [LMAO every time you ask, that ‘soon’ gets longer. If the sale gets delayed because of this, I’m coming for you OP.]

→ [Everyone’s ignoring the fact that she said she took a photo at the machine they use when they allow awakeners inside?? We could have genuine Little Bomber photos soon?]

↳ [If I were the company, I’d be concerned that leaking that photo could invite the Little Bomber to visit again, except for a different form of fun.]

↳ [I wonder how many calls the park’s getting right about now from the government and guilds.]

↳ [LOLOL Trolling even theme parks! What can’t the Little Bomber troll!?]

→ [Wait a minute! Is this why there were no potions sold yesterday?! Because you were out having ‘fun’!?]

→ [Addicted To Sweet Potions: PLEASEEE, RACCOON I NEED MORE POTIONS!! WOOF WOOF WOOF!]

↳ [Aviation Crow: Me too!! WOOF WOOF WOOF!]

↳ [Wait, weren’t you that guy who thought the world went crazy?]

↳ [LMAO HE WAS!!! HE GOT HIS HANDS ON A POTION, DIDN’T HE!?]

“Bahahaha!” I laughed, “This is fun.”

“You’re having a blast, aren’t you?” Luna chuckled.

“I am~ I’m just using Tawer as intended! It’s a social platform after all~”

“That’s how you’re justifying it? You just want to troll.”

“Two things can be true.” I smiled.

Before I could post my next message, I saw a notification. It was to a post I had been tagged in.

[Rapturous World Official: We’re glad to know that @Raccoon had a blast at our park! Our park offers the best rides that any age can enjoy! We have ten different themed worlds for you to explore! So, come on by today, we know you’ll have an explosive time!

And know, our park offers the best security and maintains guest privacy at all costs! We will never leak a guest’s picture! @Raccoon]

→ [Should a theme park with civilians really be leaning into the ‘explosive’ theme when promoting? LOL]

↳ [They’re confident. And for a good reason. Have you seen their security? They even have rankers on standby.]

→ [They’re really capitalizing the unexpected promotion Raccoon gave them. Plus, they’re confirming directly that they won’t show Raccoon’s photo to anyone? I can’t believe a corporate company would do this, respect.]

↳ [Let’s not jump to conclusions. They may say one thing but do another. But, yeah, if they actually do as they say, then that deserves my respect.]

→ [Can we expect a Little Bomber themed collab? That sounds extremely fun! Flame Queen’s collab was amazing.]

↳ [I need this!! Please @Rapturous World Official, @Raccoon, make it happen!!!]

↳ [Agreed!!! A Little Bomber area would fit in so well with the other collab areas!!]

→ [Raccoon: I’m sure everyone will have an explosive experience! The park is such a blast! Some of the rides were totally the bomb! They absolutely blew my mind! #Boom! #Explosive! #HadABlast! #NotAnAd]

↳ [?????]

↳ [LOLOLOLOL]

↳ [AFASKFA THE COMPANY SAYS THEY WON’T EXPOSE YOU, THEN YOU MAKE BOMB JOKES?!]

↳ [UNHINGED!]

↳ [UM!!!! CAN WE DOUBLE CHECK THE PARK PLEASE?]

↳ [Rapturous World Official: …?]

↳ [Rapturous World Official: Ahaha! The Little Bomber sure knows how to mess with people!]

↳ [Raccoon: (smiling raccoon icon)]

“This is fun,” I laughed, “I should’ve done this sooner!”

“Those poor, poor fans of yours…” Luna sighed from the side.

“Hey! Are you calling my fans broke!?”

“No, I’m pitying them for the suffering they’ll face under your trolling.”

“Ehehe~ It’s not even that bad! I could do a whole lot worse! But! As a respectable, mature adult, I know how to limit myself!”

“I really don’t want to see you without limitations then.” Luna chuckled.

I rolled my eyes. Really, my trolling isn’t that bad. Right?

Soon, we arrived home, and I stretched when I exited the car.

“Mmngh!” I groaned as I cracked my back and shoulders.

“When are you expecting knocks at the door?” Luna asked, “Considering you posted that you were on the way back from the association, I’d imagine it’d be soon.”

“Mm…In about a week.”

“What? A week?” Luna looked at me questioningly, “There’s no way it’d take that long.”

“Want to bet?” I asked.

“You’re on.” Luna confidently replied, “2 tokens?”

“Deal.” We shook hands.

“Such an easy win for me, I don’t know why you even took the bet.” Luna shook her head, confused.

“Hehe,” I smiled as a reply, opening Tawer.

[Raccoon: btw, association, guilds, whoever, if I hear a knock at my door within 7 days I’m blowing everything up.]

Luna paused for a moment, checked the notification she got and then looked at me with trembling eyes.

“You…”

“Hehe, should we wait a week for the tokens? Or can I accept them now?”

“…Aren’t you concerned that you’ll actually be labeled a terrorist now?”

“Hm…” I opened Tawer,

[Raccoon: Not a threat btw.]

“Pfft!” Luna coughed, “As if saying ‘Not a threat’ makes it any less convincing!”

“Blah, blah, blah.” I rolled my eyes, “If they can’t wait another week, they deserve to be blown up.” I said before starting to head into the building.

“Hey! You’re not serious, right!?”

I stopped, turned to Luna and,

“Mwah.” Gave her a kiss, “Don’t be silly, Mouse.”

Luna touched her lips, her face flushed.

“Let’s go inside,” I said, “I want to work on your potions.”

“Okay…”