The Trash Returned from Warhammer

Being watched by a crowd and forced to follow etiquette and maintain a ”ladylike” demeanor was exhausting—frankly, it would have been better to just eat something simple at home. But booking the entire place changed everything. With the breathtaking view visible only from here, the meal transformed into a pure, enjoyable experience.

”Shinji, look, look! That’s the First Middle School over there.”

”Lake Ashi is so pretty; it’s turned completely golden.”

”Tokyo-3 isn’t actually that big, is it? You can see the entire old town from up here.”

Once the waiters had cleared out, the four of them had the luxury restaurant to themselves. With no one staring, Asuka immediately reverted to her lively nature, pointing back and forth from the window. She hadn’t been to the mountain observation deck, and now she didn’t need to; this spot offered the same panoramic view of the city, with the added bonus of fine dining.

Shinji looked out, took a bite of black truffle caviar, and frowned slightly.

”Not good? You can’t get food like this anywhere else, you know,” Misato whispered, cutting into her lamb chop.

”I can tell the ingredients are precious and the flavor is impeccable, but how should I put it? The feedback it gives me isn’t as good as that ’Fried Rice King’ from the South during the New Year Festival.”

”Mm, I also think the food you cook, Ikari-kun, is better—even if, in terms of taste, visuals, and the rarity of the ingredients, they aren’t even comparable.”

Rei Ayanami agreed. She understood why they arrived at that conclusion.

Misato didn’t get angry, nor did she despise their lack of sophistication. She just rested her chin on her hand, her eyes curving like crescent moons.

”You two are finally starting to act like people, actually being able to feel emotion through food. Ah well, just consider today a chance to try something new. Eat up.”

Shinji was stunned, wondering why Misato felt the need to insult them the moment she opened her mouth—where was he not acting like a human? Asuka, meanwhile, hugged Misato from behind, teasing, ”If you can’t be a proper guardian, stop forcing the act.”

Using knives and forks, they happily enjoyed the food and the view until the sun completely vanished below the horizon. The entire city lit up, shimmering in harmony with the stars above. The four of them headed up one more level to the observation deck—a 360-degree glass-walled room where they could even see the lights of the Second Tokyo-3 over a hundred kilometers away.

’Every single one of them is an expert at wasting budget.’

That was Shinji’s first reaction, but seeing Asuka pulling him back and forth, he kept his mouth shut. Providing ”emotional value” to the pilots—perhaps the budget was finally serving a purpose. Though, the romance the girl had envisioned didn’t quite materialize, as he spent the time explaining the structural principles of the various defensive positions, leaving Asuka blinking in confusion.

”Asuka is really like a little child; she’s completely different from before,” Misato remarked, sitting in a chair. Having had too much red wine, her cheeks were flushed, and she was using the night view to sober up.

Rei sat quietly nearby, whispering, ”I, Asuka, Ikari-kun, and even you—we are all vastly different from how we started.”

”Yeah. I still remember the first time I met you; I thought, ’How can there be such a cold person in the world?’ Like a doll. Asuka was the same—always sulking, refusing to lose, unable to lose. And don’t even get me started on Shinji; he wasn’t a normal human being at all.”

Misato reminisced. It wasn’t that long ago—just a few months back. Thinking of this, she turned her head and narrowed her eyes, carefully observing Rei.

Rei was the one who had changed the most: from an emotionless doll into a real person. Even her appearance had altered; that dense, azure hair made her look much gentler.

Rei ignored the gaze, her red eyes reflecting the twinkling stars. ”Because of Ikari-kun’s orders, I began to learn proactively. Bonds deepened through exchange, and the A.T. Field opened along with my emotions. Humans are always afraid to take that first step, but only after walking through it does one know the beauty of the world.”

”You’re back to praising Shinji again. Why didn’t my attempts to ’reform’ you work?” Misato swirled her wine glass. She had tried to influence Rei in the past.

”Because you weren’t strong enough. You couldn’t cut the shackles for me. Taking the first step to embrace the world represents the unknown; no one knew if doing so was right or wrong.”

”Are you trying to say Shinji provides the safety net?”

”Of course. Even if it is wrong, Ikari-kun can pull it back onto the right track. I, Asuka, and you—we are all afraid of getting hurt and are working hard to find a sense of security.”

”What does this have to do with me?” Misato took a sip of wine and nearly choked.

”Katsuragi Misato, aren’t you fond of Ikari-kun because you are craving fatherly love?”

As it turns out, when Rei Ayanami stares at you with cold red eyes while speaking in a detached tone, the pressure on a soul-level is intense. Misato felt her scalp go numb, and she guilty peeked at the other side of the observation deck.

Thankfully, Asuka was clinging tightly to Shinji, arguing over pointless things like ”If that mountain were planted with flowers, it would be prettier” versus ”No, no, that’s a key vantage point for supply routes; it should be fortified.”

”Rei, what are you suddenly saying?” Misato flushed, lowering her voice.

”Miss Misato, you are nearly 29, aren’t you?”

”Well, just turned—no, wait, why are you asking that?”

”Then, imitating a little girl—isn’t that shameful?”

Rei looked at the mature woman coldly and said earnestly, ”Humans always crave things to fill the wounds in their hearts. This is normal. If you crave fatherly love, there is no one in the world more suitable than Ikari-kun.”

Misato’s face cycled between blue and red. She sat straight, as if she weren’t facing a fourteen-year-old girl but a master philosopher. Honestly, Rei did have a talent for philosophy.

Fortunately, Misato was an adult. She didn’t engage in tongue-tied excuses or deflect with petty tricks; she simply nodded.

”Yes. Shinji is a man capable of being my father. I found the security I had been searching for in him, and I was attracted to that mature, reliable temperament.”

’She finally said it!’

Misato felt a wave of shame. A woman nearing thirty, liking a boy of fourteen or fifteen? If others heard, they’d call the police. But like is like—why act like Asuka and desperately hide it?

”Shameful creature. I really want to correct you.”

”What did you say???”

Rei looked at her with disdain and sighed after a long while. This was the expected answer.

’As expected, Katsuragi Misato is the formidable rival.’

Asuka, that idiot, didn’t count as an enemy. Just as the Class President had said, Asuka had collected every single ”loser” trope— twin-tails, sharp-tongued, tsundere. Nothing to worry about.

”I am curious. With your personality, why haven’t you launched an offensive? You aren’t like Asuka, who only knows how to win with words—constantly agonizing, without any actual action. It wouldn’t take much energy to capture him.”

’Hey, Asuka, someone is talking behind your back.’

Misato’s expression turned strange. Theoretically, ”cute and dense” was Rei’s label—how did she end up with such high-level strategic insight? Clearing her throat, she straightened her back and became calm, clearly recognizing Rei as a master.

”Because adults know how to be patient.”

”Why be patient?”

”I know what Shinji wants. He wants to maintain the stability of the team, so I can’t cause him trouble. A sharp tongue doesn’t guarantee failure, but selfishness will definitely get you kicked out.”

Misato smiled, acting like an expert. In front of these two girls, she was an expert.

”Don’t understand? Then imagine this: If I quietly made Shinji ’become an adult,’ what would you do?”

Rei thought for a moment, utilizing every piece of material she had learned to date. A moment later, the highlights in her eyes vanished.

”I don’t know.”

”Ah? How can you not know?”

The lightless red eyes looked at her, and Rei’s hands quietly balled into fists: ”I don’t know what I would do to you.”

’Hisssss. This girl has yandere traits???’

Misato’s scalp went numb. That sentence held infinite information. Was she planning to dig a hole to bury her, or dump her in the ocean?

’As expected, not acting rashly was the right move.’

She had originally been worried about Asuka—after all, Asuka was a glass cannon; if she had a mental breakdown, who would clean up the mess? But this Rei, who seemed like a doll, was the biggest threat. She had the dangerous vibe of someone who would stab you the moment the conversation went south.

”Cough, cough. I won’t use those kinds of means. But we can’t stay at this stalemate forever, either. Some people aren’t as ’understanding of the big picture’ as I am.”

”You mean Dr. Akagi?”

”Ah? You figured that out? Don’t go provoking her. She’s not like us; she never considers the consequences.”

Misato hurriedly defended her friend, terrified that one day she’d go to work and Ritsuko would be gone.

”I will not move against Dr. Akagi. She is very important to Ikari-kun—more important than me.”

Rei said this quietly, leaving Misato between laughter and tears.

’Doesn’t that imply that I’m useless?’

But Misato saw the problem. Rei wasn’t conflicted, nor was she as utilitarian as she herself was. She was simply overly concerned with Shinji, willing to sacrifice everything for him, carefully helping to maintain the team’s unity, perhaps with a shred of friendship for Asuka.

’Wait, doesn’t that mean I could use this psychological state to PUA her?’

Stare.

Under the gaze of those red eyes, Misato wiped away that shameful thought and scratched her head, realizing where the problem lay. Everyone had changed a lot, but they were still problem children: there was a cute yandere, a glass cannon, a mad scientist, and an ”understanding/reliable adult” like herself. They were all at each other’s throats, and none of them could take a step forward.

The most suitable person to break the deadlock was actually Ritsuko. Her irreplaceable value meant she wouldn’t be dumped in the ocean, and she wouldn’t be as conflicted as Asuka—regardless of whether she was rejected, she’d act as if nothing had happened.

But why her?

’I was the one who arrived first.’

”It seems human selfishness is an unsolvable problem. Everyone wants to claim the treasure for themselves.”

”Ikari-kun is not an object. His will determines everything. Our thoughts are not important.” Rei corrected her, clearly displeased.

”Oh? Then who do you think his will will choose?”

Misato crossed her long, black-stockinged legs and puffed out her full chest—at least in terms of figure, she had the ”matchstick girl” Rei beat by a long shot.

To her surprise, Rei didn’t even glance at her, staring instead at the boy in the distance, who was currently being pestered by Asuka to give her a piggyback ride—claiming it would let her see further.

’That idiot is really getting carried away, flying off the handle. Does she not know we’re doing a soul-level interrogation over here?’

Misato saw it too and instinctively felt a surge of jealousy.

’I haven’t been carried by Shinji yet! You dare jump the queue?’

”He can choose one person, he can refuse everyone, or he can choose all. I only care about my position.”

Before Misato could speak, she heard Rei’s answer. She blinked and turned her head in confusion.

’Ah???’

”Rei, you... you don’t intend to compete for the winner?”

Misato read the words several times, confident she hadn’t misinterpreted the meaning. What did she mean by ”choose one,” ”choose all,” or ”let his will decide”? She couldn’t grasp it.

”Why compete? Would that make Ikari-kun happy? He has not, for now, revealed any intent for us to decide a winner.” Rei tilted her head, looking utterly perplexed.

”Mortal morals and laws cannot bind him at all. Just as you saw earlier, officials, generals, big shots—all must retreat before absolute power. Rules exist only to restrain the weak.”

’What is this post-modern, no—feudalistic ideology? If the people who have nothing better to do heard this, they’d strip you of your ’womanhood’ card.

What age are we in? Is this a normal view of human love? Wait, he isn’t a normal human to begin with.’

Misato suddenly snapped back to reality.

’Right.’

A few months ago, Rei was a doll, devoid of feelings, let alone morality or modern views on romance.

”Who did you learn this from?”

”I realized it myself. The materials came from works like ’My Sister Can’t Be This Cute’ and ’Magical Instructor’ given to me by Ibuki.”

Misato continued blinking. Since Hyuga from Command was a total otaku, she’d heard the names. Her brain felt oxygen-deprived, and a light-novel title flashed in her mind: Is There Any Problem with Learning About Love from Harem Anime?

She wanted to laugh, but Rei’s greatest characteristic was being a blank slate—she would take on whatever color was painted onto her through interaction. That was why Shinji kept such a close watch on her, terrified she’d learn the wrong things. He only relaxed his surveillance once she had established a certain sense of right and wrong.

”Is there something wrong with what I said?” Rei looked at her, seeking guidance.

”Of course it’s wrong! These things are the fantasies of hardcore otakus. In reality, how could—”

Misato stopped mid-sentence. If this were Asuka, she’d be rolling on the floor laughing. But as a dirty, utilitarian adult, she narrowed her eyes.

”Aside from these, what else have you watched? Like that terrifying stuff from before?”

” ’Past Diary’ and ’School Days’. I feel the two sources are contradictory. This teaches me that I need to do whatever it takes to possess Ikari-kun; whoever blocks the way must be eliminated.” Rei looked very distressed.

’Damn, I knew it. Who has so little sense of morality, teaching a good child all these bad things?’

Misato immediately understood why Shinji watched her so closely. Wasn’t this just ”monkey see, monkey do”? If she watched too many adult films, would she turn into a Slaanesh-style invasion?

She suddenly discovered Rei’s terrifying potential and felt the weight of guardianship.

”From now on, no more trashy stuff. You can watch more of ’My Sister Can’t Be This Cute’—study and comprehend it well.” Misato slipped in her own agenda.

”Mm, the Class President said the same thing.”

’Good Class President!’

She remembered the freckled girl and felt a sudden wave of gratitude. After so much talk, the alcohol was gone. NERV’s most professional Operations Director was back online.

’So that’s it. I’ve found a way to solve this mess: let Rei take the lead and charge to break the deadlock. Anyway, I don’t care if I’m drinking the first or the second bowl of soup.’

”The problem now is Asuka. This glass cannon is truly a nuisance. Shinji is probably worried about her, too.”

”What did you say about me?”

Misato jumped, turning her head to see a suspicious little face right beside her.

”Nothing. You seem to be having fun.”

”Good enough, I suppose. It’s rare for certain people to be this well-behaved.”

Asuka lifted her chin, glanced at Rei, and began complaining: ”That idiot who lacks any sense of gentlemanly conduct... how hard is it to give me a piggyback ride? He actually picked me up like a little kid.”

’Idiot. While you’re getting carried away, Rei has seen through everything and scared the living daylights out of me. And yet, you know nothing.’

Seeing Asuka’s confident demeanor made Misato want to laugh, yet the shame in her heart made it impossible. Asuka truly didn’t know her intentions. This ”purity” made Misato feel

incredibly ashamed. An adult putting all her heart and soul into competing with a child for a toy—no matter how you look at it, it’s disgraceful. But she couldn’t say it.

Rei had learned the ”wrong” lessons, but Asuka was a normal person. If she learned the truth, she’d definitely force herself to ”correct” her own behavior.

”Ah, that’s just how he is. It’s not like you learned that today.” Misato laughed it off, intentionally changing the subject.

”How was today? It’s been a while since we all watched a movie together, ate together, and enjoyed the night view.”

Individually, these things weren’t worth discussing, but their value lay in the ”togetherness”—it was the first time they had gone out as a group after knowing each other for so long.

”It was alright. It’s rare that certain people graced us with their presence, and no one else was there to interrupt.”

Asuka swung her red leather shoes, eyeing Rei with a strange look.

”Why are you being so quiet today? You didn’t eat something that disagreed with you, did you?”

”Isn’t this good? Fine, then I’ll tell you...”

”Alright, stop talking!”

Asuka and Misato spoke in unison, then stared at each other.

”You (Misato) have leverage that she holds over you?!”

Their cheeks twitched. They had a bad feeling. They both opened their mouths to ask what the leverage was, then closed them simultaneously.

Asuka was afraid of a mental breakdown; Misato was afraid of ”losing her humanity.” This wasn’t something they could ask.

’Wait, why does it feel like someone didn’t do anything at all, and yet pinned everyone’s weak points?’

Eyes gathered, but Rei remained as expressionless and cute as ever. It was infuriating. Everyone had been fooled by her harmless appearance. Who would have guessed that a doll without feelings a few months ago would become this insidious?

”Are you fishing for information?” Misato’s eyebrow twitched.

”Do you care if I’m fishing for information? It probably won’t be of any use anyway.”

”True. As a reliable adult, I know how to share.”

Misato’s thoughts suddenly cleared. She looked at Shinji. ”Anyway, he looks pretty strong. Surely he’s not just for show, right?”

Shinji stared at her, bewildered. For some reason, he felt a sense of blasphemy.

’Who could possibly question the might of an Astartes?’

”What are you two talking about?”

”Don’t ask. Secrets between girls. Well, it seems Rei doesn’t understand either. You kids really don’t understand anything.”

Misato stood up with a reserved smile and looked at the confused Asuka.

”No need to be reserved now. Take it out; you’ve been carrying it around all day, aren’t you tired?”

Asuka’s face turned red. Muttering things like ”I don’t know how it ended up in my bag” that made no sense, she took the camera out of her handbag.

”Stupid Shinji, take a good picture this time. No more grumpy face.”

”But I don’t know how.”

”Then just stand there honestly and don’t make any weird poses.”

Shinji obeyed the order. He didn’t make any ”charge” poses, just let his arms hang down and stood solemnly. As the camera was handed to a waiter, two arms suddenly wrapped around his own.

”Don’t turn your head. Just stare at the lens.”

”Fine.”

Shinji obeyed again. He felt a pair of hands wrap behind his neck and two soft objects pressed against his back. Instinctively, he wanted to resist this ”naked choke,” but then he heard Asuka whisper beside him:

”What are you standing there for? Smile.”

In an instant, that voice defeated his instinct. His taut muscles relaxed, and the muscles in his face completely softened.

Click.

He smiled.

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