My Alleged Husband

Chapter 2038: Chapter 1831: Weightless

Happy days always pass easily, but the difficult ones must be endured alone!

”I know, I know that after hearing what I’ve said, you’ll feel very angry inside, but I also know that some things just can’t be changed. No matter how wholeheartedly you treat me this lifetime, my heart is only for him. I wouldn’t change my feelings for him because of anyone’s words. I truly love him, so much that I would even give up my life for him. I once thought about how much his departure would impact me, but I never imagined that his leaving would make it impossible for me to live in peace for the rest of my life. All I wanted was for him to stay by my side, but in the end, all of this became nothing but a dream. I don’t know the reason behind it, nor do I understand why fate is so unfair to me!”

Zhang Zhentian heard Xia Jing’s words and laughed in disbelief. He didn’t understand how the woman in front of him could still complain about fate being unfair to her. Did she think fate was fair to him?

”I don’t understand what right you have to complain about fate being unfair to you now. Do you really think fate is fair to me? The woman I painstakingly cherished in the palms of my hands, the woman I placed in the most important position in my heart, yet her heart always longed for another man. Do you think fate is fair to me? I also wished that fate could be fair to me, even if you could give me just a sliver of love, I wouldn’t be so angry. I’ve always hoped to soften your stone-cold heart with my genuine affection, but no matter how high the price I pay or how much pain I endure, I just hoped for your happiness. But why did you not give me even a glimmer of hope, instead extinguishing it so clearly? In your eyes, what am I? A pawn or just something you use to transfer your affections?

Now you want fate to be a bit fair to you, so can I ask you, can you be a bit fair to me? Could you spare even a tiny bit of your love for me? Why condemn me to live in such unbearable pain? Why did you give me all this hope, accompanying me for so many years, while in your heart, there’s never been a place for me? What do you take me for? What position have you placed me in? In your eyes, who am I to you? Am I just a backup?

Xia Jing, oh Xia Jing, I love you with all my heart, ready to bear any cost and endure all pain for you. I’m willing to face the scorn and ridicule from those who say I’ve abandoned my own child, my father, and the century-old family business. All of it was just to be with you, to see you smile. Just seeing your smile makes all my sacrifices worthwhile. But why do you now reveal such a big secret to me? If you never loved me, you might have told me honestly back then. Why wait until all these years have passed to say all this? You’re truly making things difficult and embarrassing for me!

The woman I’ve loved more than half my life has never loved me back. Her obedience and concern were all just pretense. I truly have failed. As a man, I’ve utterly failed. I’ve never received a genuine heart from my woman; my woman has always been deceiving me, treating me like a backup. For any man, this is perhaps an unbearable truth. I don’t understand what sins I committed in a past life to have met you. Sometimes I foolishly comfort myself, thinking I must have saved the galaxy to have met you in this life. Yet, I never expected you’d choose such a way to hurt me. Your actions have left me in excruciating pain. I’ll never forget, and rest assured, I won’t let you reach the end of marriage because I want to keep you by my side, to make you feel the excruciating pain for the rest of your life due to your actions. I want you to know that for everything you do, there must be an equal price to pay!”

”Actually, it doesn’t matter if you make me live in unbearable pain. I don’t mind anymore. The luckiest thing in my life was meeting him. I must have saved the galaxy in a past life for him to love me without reserve. Similarly, I would give up my life for him. Even if you’re good to me and willing to give up everything for me, I don’t have that feeling for you. I don’t have that heartbeat moment with you. How can I genuinely love you then? Everything I’ve done is just a transfer of feelings. My heart has always loved him. For him, I can give up anything, all my pride, all I care about, just to see his smiling glance back at me. You can’t understand what that feels like, and I have no way to describe it to you. Maybe one day you’ll truly know, and then you will understand what kind of feeling I had back then!”

”Please, stop talking. Do you think there’s any point in telling me these things over and over? Do you think attacking me with words over and over truly brings you joy? I don’t want to say anything now. I don’t want this family shame to spread outside. My father is a man who values his reputation. His whole life, he’s lost it all due to my actions. I can’t let him be an old man, ridiculed by others. I only wish for my father to have a peaceful old age, not be hit by blows due to anyone’s affairs. That’s all I ask. Rest assured, we’ll never return to those happy times of the past, because you’re not worthy. You’re not worthy of my love!

Maybe I’m far inferior to your ex-boyfriend. I have no way to compare to him, but I can tell you, never blame fate’s unfairness. Though fate has taken away the person you loved most, it allowed me to cherish the person I love most for so many years, giving up everything of my own, only to find out that the woman I loved most didn’t love me back at all...”

How should I spend each day missing you!