My Alleged Husband

Chapter 2388: Chapter 2223: Youth

One’s youth is so fleeting, rather than getting tangled in so many worries, it’s better to live freely.

”Zhentian, deep down you surely know that some things cannot be forgotten so easily. Just as the things I did to you today, the words I spoke, you think you can brush them off indifferently. But truly, does it not trouble you inside at all? Does your heart really not ache at all?

I believe your heart aches too, because you’re a man, and a man’s dignity wants his wife to be free from the thoughts of anyone else. You don’t want your wife’s heart to have another man, especially when that man isn’t you. It’s such a great insult for you.

All these years, I have seen your genuine feelings for me, yet I have always chosen to ignore them, overlooking your sincerity. Even your heartfelt words, I turned a deaf ear to them. I know this is incredibly unfair to you, but I have no choice but to resist in this way. Maybe this is the only way for you to gradually let go of me.

I once read a book titled ”Letting Go Is Also a Kind of Beauty,” letting go is a kind of fulfillment, you know? When I read this book, I was so surprised. I wondered how others could let go so perfectly, turn away so flawlessly, even with tears flowing at that moment, yet still leave resolutely. Why can’t I?

If during the time you pursued me, I had decisively turned away, would today’s tragedy have been avoided? Would you not have been hurt so deeply by me? All of these errors I made let you bear the pain along with me, and I truly feel very sorry.

Some things cannot truly be let go of. You can’t abandon the past, nor forget the things I told you. So why force ourselves to be entangled together, each carrying guilt and unease? Is this the life we want? This is just pushing each other step by step into a dead end, not realizing what mistakes were made and what choices led to what consequences, whether we ever got what we wanted in life!

Zhang Zhentian understood what his wife meant by telling him these things. She ultimately wanted him to let go and fulfill her by letting her leave. But for him, isn’t this the hardest thing in the world?

”Perhaps what you say is correct, but for me, I have no way to fulfill that. Maybe it’s because I don’t have such a broad heart. But you know, just thinking about letting go and the woman I’ve cherished for decades no longer being mine, my heart aches like being twisted by a knife. I can’t bear that pain, nor do I want you to endure that kind of hurt. I just wish for a peaceful life for both of us. Is it really that difficult? Give me a way out and also give yourself a way out, wouldn’t that be good?

You think I can’t let go of your past, but today I’m going to make it clear to you. As long as you’re willing to try to give me a chance, try to love me, try to stay by my side!

Then I am willing to abandon all past matters for you, pretend they never happened. I will still love you as before, still stay by your side unwaveringly, until we spend eternity together.

Maybe you don’t fully believe the things I’m telling you now, but do you know? Every word I say to you is heartfelt truth. I’ve never planned to deceive you, even though you have lied to me many times, I still believe in you. I’m willing to make choices for you that others consider unwise and unprudent, but all I want is for you to stay by my side. I’ve come this far, and I believe you won’t have a heart of stone like before, knowing the feelings you have for me, but still keeping me at arm’s length...”

Zhang Yichen heard his father’s words, feeling a bit conflicted inside; his heart began to tremble as well. Even his father was willing to let go of past prejudices for his mother and his beloved. Why can’t he do the same? His wife is the one he painstakingly searched for over ten years to find, isn’t it too much to expect that such feelings can be easily severed? Can’t he make some sacrifices for her? Must he really act so domineeringly, letting these little matters ruin the major events of his life?

Perhaps only truly letting go of the past is the best path for their future together. Maybe this is the only way to make everyone discover what kind of life they truly want, what choices they make for their lives, choices that may bring a lifetime of benefits, or may exhaust them over the years.

Ran Zhihan ponders why her parents can go so far, while her husband is unwilling to let go of past prejudices?

If only her husband could do the same, how great that would be, and how happy her life would be, no one can tell.

”Zhentian, some things cannot just be let go. You should understand this too. Even if you swear today that you can let go of all the past, can you really get past that hurdle inside?

I don’t want you to force anything; I merely hope you act according to your heart. I wish for you to live happily and joyfully. I don’t care how much pain I endure, as long as you are happy. I’ve owed you so much for so long, never thinking of making any changes for you. Now, I just want to give something for you!

Do not fatuously pour all your emotions into loving me like before, because you would eventually be very exhausted. If one day I leave, you would feel like it’s the hardest blow ever, and I don’t want that outcome. What I desire is your smiling face.

But the words you said today really touched me. Maybe one day I will deeply fall in love with you, unable to extricate myself once that day arrives and for a lifetime find myself immersed within. If that day truly comes, I also hope you can do as you said today, let go of the past and sincerely be with me in life!”

Every bout of entanglement only breeds more entanglement...