My Alleged Husband

Chapter 2354: Chapter 2187: Keep Going

Your companionship is something that brings me happiness and joy, making me incredibly content.

Xia Jin wonders how she could not know that if it weren’t for her appearance, whether her husband would be the way he is today. She was supposed to live a happy and peaceful life, but because of an accidental intrusion, his life became so complicated. Everyone has paid a price for a choice they once made. Whether the price is great or small, it will inevitably affect one’s life. No one ever thought all this would come so quickly. She had given too much, and yet this is the result. Ultimately, she can only end up defeated here. She had always thought herself godlike, so why does she suffer such pain and torment time and again? Everyone’s life is filled with such pain, why can we never get what we desire?

”In fact, I understand even if you don’t say it. Because of my appearance, your life has become a mess. Originally, you could have married a wealthy heiress, lived a stable life, stayed by your father’s side, and joyfully spent your days with your son. But due to my interference, your life became like this. You lost the opportunity for a grand future. You’re so talented, yet in the end, you gave up everything for me. You abandoned your family and kinship, becoming someone who recognizes no one. At the root of all this is me, and how could I not be aware of this in my heart? Many things I haven’t said, not because I don’t want to, but because I don’t know how to. I chose to remain silent, keeping it in my heart. Maybe you don’t know how much I care about all of this!

This lifetime, I’ve already given my heart to him. I can’t give half to you. I can’t hold two men in my heart, do you understand? No matter how many mistakes I make, my heart always loves her. No matter how ruthlessly she treats me, I can never forget him. He abandoned the world and me too, yet I still feel he resides in my heart. For him, I still would be ready to selflessly give everything of myself. Maybe lies, spoken too often, make people throw caution to the wind. All these errors are mine alone, but she bears the same pain. I truly feel I’m selfish, because of my involvement, your life became like this. I’m truly sorry. I can only sincerely apologize to you, hoping you can forgive me, but perhaps you’ll never be able to forgive me. For you, this is an immense humiliation. How could you easily forgive me?

I only hope that whatever path we eventually take, whatever the outcome, whatever choices we face, you won’t let the conflict between us affect our child. He’s innocent, and over these years we owed him too much. As parents, we never took any responsibility, and as children, we never honored our own parents. We’re the most incompetent parents, the most incompetent children. How could we expect them to bear this burden? The human heart is selfish, that is truly necessary for living. We shouldn’t let our child endure pain for the sake of such matters.”

”Hmm, you’re overthinking it. For me, he’s my lifeline, and I won’t make him leave the family. Whatever mistakes you made, you should bear the consequences yourself. How could I involve my own child in it? Why should our child bear the consequences of our unhappiness? One should learn to grow, and we owed him too much before. Let’s consider today as repaying a bit of what we owe him. My son in this lifetime has faced experiences that no one should go through, repeatedly undergoing this hellish training. He only wants his parents by his side, but he never expected that when his parents came back, his mother would reveal a shocking secret, that the person his mother has always loved is not his biological father, but another man!

I don’t know what kind of blow this outcome will deal him, but I believe he can still understand you. He’s experienced this feeling of unrequited love. In life, there are seven sufferings, and to part with a loved one is the most painful!

Regardless of what you say, I’ve chosen to forgive you. I can feel how much you love her. For her, you would risk your life, something I’ll never receive from you in my lifetime. I truly envy her, but I also resent her, why does she possess my wife’s heart, why does my wife’s heart never love me? I don’t ask for much, just the truest form of care from my wife, yet she’s not thinking of me. This is perhaps my greatest failure in life. Though my wife is in my arms, the one in her heart is not me, and only I know what kind of pain this is. For family interests or whatever reason, I won’t choose divorce; it would only worsen our situation, make us a laughingstock!

It’s logical I made this decision because I want, at least once, to preserve my father’s dignity. He’s such a prideful person, but for the sake of our family, he discarded his dignity, never even considering what kind of pride he has left. But he could never imagine that, as a son, I sacrificed significantly to preserve his dignity. Maybe my father would think I’m still a bit useful as his son, still holds him in my heart. But who knows that over the years, my longing for her has grown daily, never forgetting my biological father waits at home, yet I repeatedly chose not to return for my wife. But who truly knows what comes of it all?”

My desperate wish shouldn’t be so grand, because having you is the best there is!