My Alleged Husband

Chapter 1536: Chapter 1330: Praying to Buddha

Could we ever meet again? I’ve been pleading fervently before Buddha for thousands of years, yet ultimately, will it touch the heavens?

”Yichen, everyone in this world is the same. Not many are good people. You might feel my words are harsh and dismiss everyone, but some things you have to experience yourself to realize just how disgusting they all are!

You must understand, there are far too many people like this in the world. Sometimes, if you can think it through, nothing will seem as it is.”

Zhang Yichen never expected his mother to think this way today, much less to try and console him in this manner. He had imagined countless times when faced with difficulties, his family would come to his aid. But when this day finally became reality, he couldn’t even comprehend his sense of joy from the depths within. Although initially thinking everything would forever remain this way, he could never foresee the greater changes ahead. Time and again, family upheavals eroded his faith in them, and eventually he lost complete trust in his parents.

”Mom, I don’t need you to guide me in this way. I need you to be honest with me. I don’t want us to argue again and again over trivial matters, you know? This scene today, I’ve longed for it for so many years without seeing it. Who could understand the excitement and happiness from the depths of my heart at this moment? I long for this day to forever stay here, for time never to move again. Although my family isn’t happy, at least my parents are giving me care and love. How could I possibly not be happy deep inside? I never thought that one day I’d gain my parents’ concern and care, and now that my dream has come true, I am really joyous and don’t know what words to use to express my current feelings of excitement!”

”Child, if you need us, Dad and I will always be by your side, giving you all our care and support. No matter what hardships you face, no matter what you achieve, I will give you the utmost help. The day you make it a reality again, and make me feel like the happiest and most joyful in my life, I will be delighted. I’ve never thought about what my life would ultimately be like for every single thing I’ve done, but today, I am also greatly excited by these heartfelt words from my son.

You know? I’ve anticipated this scene for so many years, I’ve been waiting for it yet only now have I finally waited long enough. Do you know how much agony I’ve endured? How painful and hard to let go it is?

Maybe I did many bad things in the past, harmed everyone close to me and made them suffer, but I believe if I truly repent, one day I can be with the one I truly love.

I made many mistakes before, I know that, yet I still believe that as long as I can be upright and straightforward, I’ll become the person I want to be no matter where or when. I’m not a Saint, I cannot let go of all things within me, I want to truthfully remember every story I’ve lived through.

Living like this is indeed tough; during the time before your forgiveness, each day has been painful. I never considered the outcome, yet I persevered to today — I’m not sure what willpower pushed me. During the time I was away from this home, though I lived freely, I wasn’t happy. Upon returning, although it has been tormenting, I indeed pursued what I wished the most, and achieved the ending I desired most. I have no reason to resent anyone. The mistakes I made must be borne by myself to turn everything to clouds of smoke. Escaping will not bring resolution; in the past days, what you’ve said is so accurate, I hadn’t realized my husband would repeatedly avoid responsibility, nor that he’d become so cowardly. He is no longer the person I previously knew, and I don’t know what led to his transformation?

Perhaps in your eyes, you think his change today is deeply tied to me, caused by me. But no one knows how arduous it has been for me, how painful each action was. When will others understand the pain within me, after persevering step by step to this day, for what?

At times I feel truly foolish, yet once more am I deceived by others, still giving all my trust to them. I don’t understand why he did this or why I foolishly endured in such a hopeless way, why I should shoulder the responsibilities I least wanted to bear, and why it ended this way for me?

Child, I know, you want to ask whether I’ve ever regretted every mistake made over the years. I can clearly tell you now, I’ve never regretted it. Moreover, there are no remedies for regret in this world. Even if you do regret deeply, what can it return? Even if you’re sick from regret, you can’t change the outcome!

The greatest harm in the world is betrayal. When one chooses to betray, it’s destined that there can be no result between you and them. Whether friends, family, or lovers, you no longer hold the intimate bond you once did, for it’s no longer suitable for you. No matter how good you treat them, you mean nothing to them in their eyes; they don’t accommodate you, and you can’t tolerate their faults, leading to an inevitable game over!

When everything far exceeds your imagination, and you have no means to salvage it, then you’ll realize what you truly lost, missed, and gave up. You’ll never know if what you did was right or wrong. You only know the mistakes you made will linger with you forever, never allowing you to forget!”

Despite how many sweet nothings are whispered about love, who truly cares? My heart aches deeply, yet nobody understands!