Back Then, I Adored You

Xu Wennuan was washing vegetables in the kitchen when Qin Zhi’ai got home.

When Xu Wennuan heard the door, she turned from the sink with wet hands and red eyes, stuck her head out the kitchen door, and said, “Xiao’ai, come help me wash vegetables. We’re going to have hotpot, and I’m hungry.”

She was back in the kitchen before Qin Zhi’ai could respond.

Qin Zhi’ai changed her shoes and walked into her bedroom. As she was changing her clothes, she peeked into Xu Wennuan’s bedroom. It was so clean that Qin Zhi’ai wondered if she’d really even heard those smashing noises in there.

She turned away from Xu Wennuan’s bedroom and looked at the balcony. Seeing several black trash bags, she assumed Xu Wennuan must have cleaned her bedroom while she was gone.

After changing her clothes, Qin Zhi’ai went to the living room. She saw Xu Wennuan plugging in the hotpot pot to boil the soup base. She went over to help and to gage Xu Wennuan’s mood. She had some questions for her, but whenever she was about to ask she decided it was better not to do so.

Qin Zhi’ai and Xu Wennuan took a seat at each end of the dining table. Qin Zhi’ai dropped some lamb into the boiling pot. As she stirred the soup with chopsticks, Xu Wennuan suddenly ran to the refrigerator and grabbed two cans of beer. “Xiao’ai, would you like a beer?”

Qin Zhi’ai shook her head. “I’ll have milk.”

“Okay.” Xu Wennuan didn’t force the beer on Qin Zhi’ai. She took a bottle of milk from the milk box on the shelf.

Xu Wennuan sat down, opened the beer, and threw her head back. She gulped half of the beer like she was drinking water. She grabbed the lamb with her chopsticks, put it in her mouth, and chewed it with a smile.

Seeing Xu Wennuan smiling made Qin Zhi’ai smile. She said, “Nuannuan…”

Seeming to know that Qin Zhi’ai was going to ask about her conversation with Wu Hao, Xu Wennuan raised her beer can and tapped it to Qin Zhi’ai’s milk bottle. “Cheers!” she interrupted.

Qin Zhi’ai had two sips of milk before she looked at Xu Wennuan, who picked up two slices of meat from the hotpot and put them in Qin Zhi’ai’s bowl, signaling her to eat them while still warm.

Qin Zhi’ai could tell Xu Wennuan did not want to talk about Wu Hao, so she refrained from asking.

Later, when Xu Wennuan opened the second can of beer, she was ready to start talking about it on her own. “Xiao’ai, I’m not going to marry Wu Hao.”

Qin Zhi’ai had expected that Xu Wennuan would cancel her wedding, but hearing Xu Wennuan actually say it still made her hand shake.

“Xiao’ai.” Xu Wennuan looked down and tried hard to curl up her lips. “I didn’t break up with him. To be honest, for the past few days, I’ve felt like I’ve been in a dream and I would wake up and realize Wu Hao had never been with Jiang Qianqian. But no, it wasn’t a dream and It has happened many times. I’m mad at Wu Hao and incredibly sad, too. When Wu Hao and I fought, I said many hurtful things. But Xiao’ai, do you know I just could not tell him I want to break up with him?”

Tears rolled down from the corners of Xu Wennuan’s eyes. She raised the beer can and took another large gulp before continuing, “When I dated Wu Hao, I had never thought I would ever break up with him, or that anything like this could happen to us.”