The Trash Returned from Warhammer

The rain gradually ceased, the dark clouds dispersed, and sunlight once again bathed the earth.

Shinji emerged from the principal’s office. He had just politely declined the proposal to expand his training methods to the basketball and rugby clubs. The principal was full of regret, believing that First Junior High had missed its chance to dominate the Japanese sports world.

This made Hikari Horaki breathe a sigh of relief. This whole affair had started because of her; tormenting the football club was enough. She couldn’t let Shinji-kun brainwash anyone else—though she was overthinking it; an Astartes wouldn’t be that bored.

”This was a whim, but interests must be controlled. Excessive obsession interferes with one’s primary duties. Unless the football club members can kick an Angel to death with one foot, there is no need to invest further resources.

Every action has multiple ripple effects. It may seem like I just remodeled the football club out of boredom, but in reality, I conducted an experiment and repaid the class rep’s favor.”

Shinji began to lecture, yet no one felt annoyed. This was because he was strict with himself and led by example, rather than simply handing down life lessons from a high-handed position.

”Eh? My favor?” Hikari realized something was off.

”Of course. You deserve a share of the credit for the changes in Rei Ayanami and Asuka. I’ve seen it all,” Shinji said warmly. This class rep was a clever leader and an important supporting character.

”Uh, I didn’t play that big of a role. I just wanted to be friends with them.” Hikari scratched her nose, feeling a bit embarrassed.

”It’s enough. Only through mutual contact can the AT Field of the heart be opened. Your role is one I cannot replace.” Shinji walked out of the office building, only to see Rei Ayanami leaning on her umbrella waiting outside. He looked left and right.

”Where’s Asuka? Isn’t she usually inseparable from you?”

”She went back early. It seems she’s avoiding you.” Rei was full of confusion and a hint of nervousness. ”Shinji-kun, what exactly do you want to say to her?”

She knew what Asuka was afraid of. To be honest, she was a bit afraid too. Unlike that idiot, Rei saw through everything; she knew there were others waiting in the wings to play the ”oriole” catching the mantis. For him to be so solemn, it had to be a significant topic.

”I just want to clear up a misunderstanding. The current her should be able to withstand that sense of shame.”

’Misunderstanding? Oh, THAT matter.’

Rei’s eyes instantly crinkled into crescents. She felt all the frustration of the past two days vent out at once. In a moment of inexplicable pleasure, an idea struck her.

”I don’t think there’s a rush. Asuka just finished her ’supplementation.’ If such a major revelation makes her shut herself away again, won’t your hard work be for nothing?”

”Surely not? She’ll probably be awkward for a while, but there’s a seventy percent chance no major problems will occur.”

”Then why not wait until it’s a hundred percent? If Asuka gets moody, it makes things difficult for everyone, right?”

Shinji thought seriously for a moment and nodded slightly.

”Alright, I’ll listen to you. If she asks again, I’ll say the time hasn’t come yet.”

Seeing Rei’s smile become even more unsettling, Hikari Horaki kicked Rin Chihaya in the rear, glaring at her.

’Look what you’ve done, showing Rei all those weird things. She’s turned into a total yandere!’

’Class Rep, you had a hand in it too! Who knew Rei would believe everything and learn everything?’

Rin Chihaya rubbed her rear, feeling quite aggrieved. They had originally wanted to make Rei’s life richer so she wouldn’t be so blank and ask strange questions all day.

Who knew Rei was a complete blank slate? Like a proto-AI, she was frantically absorbing nutrients, and unlike Kaworu Nagisa, she was achieving enlightenment through the ”Otaku Way.”

”What’s next? Are we going to the family restaurant where Toji works part-time?”

”Sure, I’ve been wanting to see Toji serving tea and water.”

”I work in the kitchen!”

Hearing the group chat, Shinji didn’t mind. The EVAs were under maintenance, so there wasn’t much to do these few days. But he looked up and saw a scruffy man with stubble waiting at the school gate, and his brow furrowed.

”You guys go ahead. I have some business.”

”Shinji-kun, do you want me to come?” Rei also saw the man.

”No need. Just bring back three portions of dinner.”

Shinji walked toward the man. Daily life was a tonic to him, but it would never be allowed to interfere with the mission.

Ryoji Kaji had returned.

.

.

.

”Misato, tell me what to do. I’m clearly not afraid anymore, but I don’t know how to take the next step.”

At the same time, Asuka had already returned home, complaining to Misato Katsuragi, who had just come back from work.

She had been miserable these past few days. She had finally made a decision to be straightforward and frank about her feelings, but the progress bar was stuck. She couldn’t talk about these troubles with anyone else, so she had to consult this rather unreliable adult.

Misato Katsuragi sat upright. If not for the beer in her hand, she would look no different than if she were chairing a meeting in the Operations Department. She could even clearly feel her own heartbeat.

Coming home today, she saw a familiar ”maggot” rolling around on the sofa—she was used to that—but Asuka’s first sentence almost made her heart stop.

”I discovered that Rei isn’t the only one who likes Shinji!”

The setting sun shone through the window. The girl kept her head down, her bangs hiding her expression, looking quite ominous. Just as Misato thought she was exposed and was ready to call Shinji for help, Asuka’s dejected, ”kitten-head” expression of grievance made her breathe a sigh of relief.

’Ah, as long as it’s not me. Wait, someone else!?’

”So... you like Shinji?” she asked tentatively.

Asuka’s eyes widened, her mouth twitched, and then her face turned beet-red as she gave an imperceptible nod.

”Mmm. Maybe a tiny bit.”

’So cute.’

This shyness triggered Misato’s dormant ”maiden heart.” She realized Asuka really was different now. In the past, she could imagine the girl’s response—she would have waved her hands dismissively with a look of utter indifference.

”Huh? Are you an idiot? How could I like a boorish brat like him?” ”Impossible! A high-quality woman like me is doing him a favor just by being his friend.”

Yes, that would have been the content, delivered with a rhythmic, arrogant tone.

But now it was different. She actually revealed her heart in front of me.

Is this the ”supplementation” Shinji talked about? Repairing the flawed parts of the personality? For a moment, Misato felt a burst of maternal instinct. It was true she wanted to be Shinji’s daughter, but she also wanted to be everyone else’s mother.

”Asuka, you’ve finally faced your own heart and become honest.”

”I was always honest, okay? I always say what’s on my mind, even if I offend people!”

”You’re honest about things you don’t care about, but you’re incredibly awkward about the things you do.”

”No I’m not... fine, I won’t argue with you. You don’t understand me anyway.” Asuka took a breath. She knew Misato was right, but the truth was embarrassing. Supplementation wasn’t a total character reversal like the football club; Asuka wasn’t going to self-reflect on her past self. She sat cross-legged on the chair, looking solemn.

”Ugh, I want you to be my consultant. Misato is an adult, after all. Help me think of how to push the progress bar.”

’Huh? You want me to help push the progress? I’m looking for someone to help me, too!’

Misato took a gulp of beer to ease the awkwardness. Looking into those innocent blue eyes, her sense of guilt grew stronger, but she wasn’t foolish enough to answer the question directly.

”Why the sudden rush? Aren’t the three of you quite harmonious?”

”Because I discovered a problem.”

”What problem?”

”I’m already using all my strength just to keep an eye on Rei. It was hard enough to create a stalemate. But if I spend all my time tripping her up and we don’t pay attention, what if someone else makes a ’stealth run’? Then wouldn’t both of us lose out miserably?”

Cough, cough, cough!

Misato immediately began to cough. Seeing Asuka’s suspicious look, she quickly covered her mouth.

”That... that wouldn’t happen, surely.”

”Who says it wouldn’t? Let me tell you about today, and you help me analyze it.”

Asuka immediately recounted the ”bet” with Shinji—how he talked about having courage and enduring everything, only to stop mid-sentence.

”That idiot stopped halfway and looked at Chihaya for a second. I was thinking right then—could he like the ’pink-hair’? No, wait, I checked specifically, those two don’t have much interaction.”

’Of course not! What are you thinking?’

Misato didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. Asuka was actually ”investigating.” She felt there had to be a misunderstanding here; generally speaking, Shinji didn’t put on a serious, solemn expression for no reason.

However, she didn’t clarify. The thoughts of a ”dirty adult” surged up, and she asked a counter-question tentatively:

”That’s unlikely. But... hypothesize. Hypothesize that besides Rei Ayanami, there is someone else who likes Shinji and is working in the shadows. What would you do?”

If it were Rei Ayanami, her eyes would likely lose their light as she answered, ”I don’t know how to deal with her.” But Asuka was the opposite. She stood up angrily, brandishing a fist.

”A disgraceful person like that should be corrected! I’d rather lose to Rei than accept losing to a sneak like that!”

Misato immediately shrank her neck, then forced her chest out.

”Not necessarily, not necessarily. That guy Shinji is like a steel plate; ordinary people can hardly understand what he’s thinking.”

”Yeah, why do I like such an idiot? Misato, who do you think it could be? It couldn’t be Dr. Akagi, could it? That idiot is always hanging around her.”

”H-how should I know? Ritsuko wouldn’t make a move. She cares about efficiency; she wouldn’t be as conflicted as you girls.” Misato stopped mid-sentence because Asuka’s expression had become somewhat suspicious.

”Anyway, don’t worry. I’ll keep a close eye on her.”

”Why are you keeping a close eye on her?”

”Uh, keeping an eye on her at work! She’s a top-tier corporate ox; she needs to be squeezed properly.” Misato gave a flimsy excuse, only to see Asuka grab her hand as if acting spoiled.

”Misato, just tell me. How do you land a man? You should have experience. Should I prepare ’winning underwear’ and just go for a direct attack? After all, idiot Shinji is still a man... the books say you just have to trigger an impulse.”

’Doesn’t this sound like Ritsuko’s advice?’

Misato’s expression froze, and she instinctively shook her head.

”No! You’re not even fifteen yet. How can you use adult methods? It’s far too early.”

”Misato, why didn’t I notice your thinking was so old-fashioned before?”

”I am your guardian, after all. There are some things that simply cannot be done.”

”Then what other way is there?” Asuka pouted. She had been losing sleep for days, thinking that declaring her feelings would turn a certain someone into a ”loser dog.”

’If I had a way, would I even tell you?’

”Ahem. Shinji isn’t a normal person. You need patience. Anyway, the biggest threat is Rei. Just keep her locked down.”

”But I’m afraid of someone doing a stealth run! Fine, I’ll pay more attention from now on.” Asuka was somewhat dissatisfied, but she smiled again a moment later and stretched.

”Ah, I feel much better after telling you all this. Help me analyze things more in the future. Besides you, I have no one else to talk to.”

”No problem. In the future, tell me whatever thoughts you have first.” Misato replied smoothly, then immediately covered her face.

”Misato, you’re so weak today. How are you drunk after just one can of beer?”

Hearing that cheerful voice, she covered her face even tighter.

’It seems... I really do need to be ”corrected.”’

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