The Sorcerer's Handbook

After hurriedly finalizing their top-secret plan, ”Rescue Iger from Happiness,” the group filed out of Ashe’s room.

Just as Annan pushed the door open, she caught sight of a flash of golden hair disappearing around the corner of the corridor.

Ashe looked surprised. ”Is Iger not working overtime tonight?”

”He’s about to become the Belldet family’s son-in-law. Why on earth would he still be working?” Annan lowered her voice, gesturing for them to follow. ”This is our chance.”

They tailed him all the way to the second-floor atrium. The manor stood high above the second-tier city, offering an unobstructed view of the skyline. Under a canopy of blazing stars, thick layers of pale yellow light cast a soft glow over the landscape like heavy makeup, transforming the artificial garden into a romantic stage.

The garden maze provided the perfect cover. Halfway through, Iger’s voice drifted out from the hedges. ”Sorry. Have you been waiting long?”

”No,” Anphel replied, her voice carrying an unconcealed cheerfulness.

”Hm?”

”It’s nothing. My sister kept telling me you’re a Mind Class sorcerer with plenty of dating experience, so I should be careful around you. But you seem much more nervous than I expected.”

”Really? Is there anything wrong with how I look?”

”No, there is nothing wrong with how you look. I can just feel it.”

Even from her tone alone, the eavesdroppers could easily picture a girl smiling with narrowed eyes.

”Mr. Iger, you’re the type who stands tall against the strong but softens for the weak. You were calm and sharp when facing my sister, but when it comes to a fool like me, you get flustered instead.”

Iger laughed. ”Who calls herself a fool? Every fool I’ve ever met refuses to admit it.”

***

As soon as Ashe heard that, he whispered, ”He’s talking about you, Harvey.”

Harvey retorted calmly, ”I’m a fool. Your turn to prove it.”

Fools never call themselves fools. By that logic, anyone who actually admitted to being one wasn’t one.

Ashe didn’t hesitate. ”I’m a fool.”

The moment the words left his mouth, Annan, Lys, and Harvey simultaneously pulled out their Books of Gospel and hit record.

Harvey looked at Ashe with a pitying gaze, as if to say, You really went out of your way to prove a point.

”Alright, recording complete.”

Ashe gritted his teeth. ”This is bullying! This is definitely workplace bullying! I’m going to report every single one of you to the Gospel!”

”What do you think you’re doing here?”

They turned around to find a blue-haired girl standing right behind them. Hands on her hips, she glared at the Funeral Agency crew like a boss catching employees slacking off on the clock.

Annan shot back. ”We’re not working overtime tonight, so we can go wherever we want. What about you, Evelyn? What are you doing here?”

”My sister’s on a date. Of course I’m here to eavesdrop and keep an eye on things!” Evelyn declared shamelessly, feeling entirely justified.

Annan put on a look of exaggerated shock. ”Do you seriously not trust our ’good friend’ Iger Perskin to the point of spying on his date? Wow, I feel terrible for him. I’ll just have to warn him and let him see your true colors!”

Evelyn rolled her eyes with deep disdain. ”Annan, your acting is atrocious as always. It’s honestly painful to watch.”

”Then come hit me. Want me to kneel so we’re eye-to-eye? With my height, fighting you feels like trying to punch a fire hydrant from the second floor.”

”An—nan—”

”Wait,” Pankey interrupted, looking puzzled. ”We’re making this much noise. Why are they still chatting away normally inside?”

Evelyn raised an eyebrow. ”Heh. Did you really think I wouldn’t expect you vultures to come sabotage things? I’ve set up a soundproof Miracle barrier, and the moment Iger walked in, the garden layout shifted. The inner and outer mazes are completely cut off from each other. Not only can you not get in, but they’ll get lost if they try to come out. They can take their sweet time building their relationship.”

”Then how are they supposed to leave?” Ashe asked.

Evelyn brandished the controller. ”I’m staying right here and listening. The second I think they’ve had enough, I’ll press this, and the maze and the sound barrier will drop!”

She smirked. ”Of course, you could always just smash the setup to ruin the date. But the property damages... well, I hope you can afford them.”

It was a layered trap. If the Funeral Agency damaged the private grounds, Evelyn would happily acquire a few new indentured ”employees” to cover the debt.

Annan nodded slowly. ”Oh? What a thorough setup... hey!”

Annan lunged, but Evelyn swiftly dodged the grab. ”I knew it. Annan, you’re still as rough as a wild beast.”

”And you dodge like a goblin!” Annan snapped, turning back to the group. ”What are you all waiting for? Help me!”

Evelyn smiled confidently. ”Trying to gang up on me? Without weapons and without using offense-type Miracles, I’d love to see how you handle a Two-Winged Fist and Claw Class sorcerer like me.”

Pankey reminded them sharply, ”Do not damage the garden. You can only use Miracles for self-enhancement. Miss Evelyn came alone on purpose. She wants to provoke us into damaging her property.”

***

”Do you like the starry sky?” Iger asked.

”I do,” Anphel said. ”When I look up at a sky full of stars, it reminds me of how small I am, and the things I worry about every day suddenly seem trivial. There are two things that move me the most in this world. One is the magnificent night sky, and the other is the perseverance of the figures in legendary tales. To me, the brilliance of human nature shines just as brightly as the stars.”

***

Harvey suddenly lunged at Evelyn. She reacted with agile grace, leaping lightly into the air and leaving the necromancer to crash face-first into the dirt.

Annan and Ashe attacked from both sides next. The blue-haired girl ducked smoothly under Ashe’s outstretched arm, causing the two attackers to slam violently into each other instead.

***

”Mr. Iger, you must have traveled to many places, right? Do you have any thrilling adventures to share?”

”I have a few,” Iger replied, rubbing the back of his neck. ”But the details aren’t exactly wholesome.”

Anphel’s eyes lit up. ”That sounds perfect. I actually prefer dark, realistic adventure stories.”

”Do you long for adventure, then?”

”Yes. I’ve loved adventure stories since I was a child, but the farthest I’ve ever traveled is to neighboring cities. The only place I really get to ’adventure’ is within this manor. My favorite stories always involve exploring the wilderness far beyond city borders and uncovering the ruins of ancient civilizations. Have you ever experienced anything like that, Mr. Iger?”

”Well, during a black-on-black underworld deal, I discovered that our trading site used to be an ogre tribe’s dining hall from hundreds of years ago. Does that count?”

”A black-on-black deal! ヾ(≧▽≦*)o ”

***

Back in the bushes, Pankey seized his moment and dove forward, wrapping his arms around Evelyn’s legs. Remaining perfectly calm, she leaned forward and flicked her legs upward, breaking his grip in one smooth motion before kicking the butler boy hard right under the chin.

Annan rushed in again to grab her. Evelyn let out a sharp cry and split her legs wide. Only then did Ashe realize she was wearing safety shorts under her skirt. Her legs spun like windmill blades, sweeping Annan completely off her feet.

Evelyn let out a disdainful laugh, executed two flawless flips, and landed proudly like a champion.

”Oof!”

At the exact moment Harvey groaned on the ground, Evelyn accidentally stepped right on the necromancer’s back, lost her balance, and fell flat on her face. The controller flew out of her pocket, sliding across the grass until it bumped into a pair of small feet.

It was Lys! She had been silently watching the entire spectacle. At the sight of the controller, she blinked, then calmly picked it up and handed it to Ashe.

***

Back at the garden, Anphel said, ”Right, let’s get our story straight first. When I go back, I’ll tell my sister that I am very satisfied with you. That way, the initiative stays on your side.”

Iger blinked, caught off guard. ”Why?”

”Hmm?”

”Why are you going to such lengths to help me?”

”It’s not really helping. I genuinely am satisfied with you, so I’m not lying. Besides, you are under my sister’s threat. If I do this, you’ll have more room to maneuver.”

”A threat? But this deal was my own choice—”

”If your only choices are ’make me like you’ or ’serve the Belldet family for life,’ that can’t be called a free choice. I know my sister has her reasons, and you have your own goals. A clash between you is inevitable. I’m just trying to delay the moment your conflict finally erupts.”

Anphel looked up, offering a soft smile. ”But you and my sister are both smart. If you gain a little time, maybe you’ll find a solution that benefits everyone. Hehe. At worst, I’ll just get scolded later. I can accept the consequences.”

***

”Ashe, now’s our chance!” Annan screamed, lunging forward from the dirt to grab Evelyn’s calf.

Evelyn bared her teeth like a fierce little tiger, trying to shake Annan off. ”Ashe, don’t you dare!”

Meanwhile, Harvey was busy nursing his injuries after being stomped on, and Pankey was still reeling from the heavy blow to his chin.

Ashe looked down at the controller in his hand, then looked over at the peaceful couple. After a moment’s thought, he sighed, turned around, and threw the controller straight toward the center of the garden where Iger and Anphel were sitting.

”Forget it,” Ashe muttered.

With that, the cult leader clapped the dirt off his hands and led Lys back inside.