My Alleged Husband

Chapter 638: Chapter 617 Temporarily Do Not _1

Zhang Yichen watched his wife still hesitating. In truth, her heart also felt pain. Why should he need to beg so humbly for his own wife when he just wanted a child? This time, he simply wished for an additional child who could accompany his son, growing up healthy and happy. Even if one day he left this world, maybe then, there would be a different outcome.

”Wife, do you still not forgive me?” he asked. ”I know the things I’ve done have truly hurt you, and perhaps you find it hard to forgive me. But you should also try to see things from my perspective. If you knew your husband had done such things, your heart would also struggle to accept it and not so readily forgive him. If we put ourselves in each other’s shoes, please give me another chance and let’s not make it so awkward between us. Let’s give our son a brother or sister, so he doesn’t have to walk the path of life alone but has someone to grow up with!”

”Husband, this isn’t what I mean. I have actually forgiven you. No matter how harsh your words are or how you insult me, I always hold in my heart the desire to be with you until old age. No matter when, I will always hold you in the most important place in my heart,” she replied. ”My refusal is only because I’m not yet ready to have this child. I don’t know what status I should have when I bear this child. Grandfather is still hospitalized, and my child is still undergoing devilish training. We still face all the previous unresolved conflicts between us. Do you think I should be pregnant now and once again gain the affection and respect of the whole family?”

Perhaps you think I am being too sensitive, but do you know for a woman, if respect and care from her family only come because she is pregnant, then what’s the point of staying in this house?

In truth, my thoughts are quite simple. I just hope to have a happy and peaceful life at home!

Husband, when I am truly ready to have a child, I will unhesitatingly join you to have a child that is the embodiment of our love. But now, I am not sure whether you still love me. So if I were to have our child now, where would this child stand between us? After he is born, how should he face everyone with his identity? He would merely be the result of soothing our anger during our quarrels, not necessarily an embodiment of love.

To put it more harshly, he might not be the result of love, but the offspring of our mutual fury. Do you think that child would be happy after birth? No parent wants to see their child living unhappily right from birth. I just can’t bear it!

At the same time, I am also very afraid that once born, this child will choose the same fate as his brother. I don’t want my children to suffer like this, to need to endure painful ’devil training’ to prove themselves. How exhausting that would be! They are both my children, and as a mother, all I want is for them to live safely and peacefully. I am a mother, not a Saint. I can’t bear to watch my children endure such pain while I stand by, happily watching them undergo ’devil training’!

I really hope you can understand my concerns. I am not a heartless person; nor do I not want to have children with you. But right now, I truly want to take a moment to calm down, to think carefully about what my next step should be, so that we both do not find ourselves in a passive position. I am a mother who simply wants my children to avoid painful training; that is enough for me!”

Zhang Yichen was all too aware of what was in his wife’s heart. As a father, he too did not want to see his children suffer the same pain he had endured. He wanted his children to grow up healthy and with their parents by their side.

Having lacked parental love himself, why did his son, who had both parents around, still need to endure such painful training? Was it really just to prove to his parents that he was the most remarkable child?

Sometimes, he himself couldn’t figure out what his son truly thought. Although he knew it was fruitless, he was still resolved to keep going, ultimately hurting only himself.

”Zhichen, since you’ve said all this, then I have nothing more to say. My only choice is to respect your decision. I believe that one day you will want to continue to have another child with me. Right now, I just want you to live well and stop thinking about these issues. Let the past be just like the fleeting clouds; let it go. It’s enough for us to live a happy and peaceful life together,” he said.

”I understand that everything you do is for the good of our family, and I know the kind of pain you don’t want our son to endure. I have suffered once; how could I bear to let my child suffer that again? I am a parent too, and I want my child to live without worries. The wounds I have suffered as a father, how could I wish for my child to endure them once more? The torment of those wounds is unforgettable. I walked every step in blood to reach where I am today, and everything I have is the result of my own efforts. I have a clear conscience. I don’t want my children to suffer a hard life when they are well-off. Yet, these are trials that every Zhang Family child must face,” he continued. ”Only by becoming an Upper-class Person can one ensure that nobody will trample over them for a lifetime.

I believe you would not want to see your child’s dignity trampled on casually by others. For a child, that’s an insult, and for a man, it’s a trample upon his character and dignity. No man can tolerate such humiliation. I believe our child’s decision to choose this path is the correct one!”