I Siphon the Dead to Become the Strongest

”Honestly, this is just great,” Germaine started, her voice tight. ”I’m thrilled. Really. Every one of these things is basically a walking paycheck, and if we keep this up, the credits are going to be—”

She didn’t get to finish her sentence. A Fulminar Wolf leaped from a dense thicket, its trajectory aimed straight for her throat. In a blur of silver, Germaine swung her longsword upward, the blade meeting the wolf’s snapping fangs with a jarring CLANG.

The impact sent a vibration up her arms that made her teeth rattle. She gritted her teeth, her boots sliding back in the dirt as she struggled to push the beast away. It was a deadlock of pure strength—the wolf’s predatory desperation versus Germaine’s cold discipline.

”Ethan!” she strained, her voice tight with effort. ”If this keeps up, we’re going to get surrounded! Do something useful!”

”On it! One ’useful’ delivery coming right up!”

Ethan didn’t use a skill. He didn’t call upon the heavens. He simply stepped in and delivered a straight, concentrated punch directly into the wolf’s exposed flank.

K-BOOM!

The sound was less like a punch and more like a small cannon going off. The wolf didn’t just fly back; it was launched. It became a silver blur, blasting away from the trees and soaring through the air with a confused, high-pitched yelp.

”Sayonara, fuzzball!” Ethan waved a gauntlet casually. He then looked at Germaine, his visor tilting. ”Well, the more the merrier! The more monsters we fight, the closer we get to a massive payday... and also the closer we get to our inevitable, agonizing deaths. It’s called ’High Risk, High Reward,’ Germaine. Look it up.”

He didn’t wait for her to respond. ”Anyway, this forest is a nightmare for maneuvering. Let’s get out of the trees!”

They turned and bolted, sprinting through the undergrowth. Behind them, a chorus of guttural growls erupted as the pack pursued, their eyes glowing with a manic hunger. Several wolves began blasting torrents of plasma fire, scorching the earth and turning the foliage into a wall of flame.

But as the wolves charged in a frenzied line, the forest fought back.

SNAP!

The first three wolves were suddenly yanked upward, disappearing into a massive, weighted net that slammed shut with a violent whoosh. The next two didn’t even see the danger; they simply vanished into the ground with a sudden, muffled thump as they plummeted into expertly concealed pit-traps.

Ethan, noticing the pattern of sudden disappearances, didn’t think—he just acted. In one swift movement, he scooped Germaine up, pulling her flush against his chest armor in a sudden, frantic embrace.

”HEY!” Germaine yelled, her face flushing with sudden anger. ”Just because we’ve reached a momentary truce doesn’t mean you can just hug me out of nowhere, you oversized tin can! Put me—”

”Less complaining, more not-dying!” Ethan retorted, cutting her off. He didn’t let go; instead, he used the momentum to leap upward, soaring five feet into the air and landing well clear of the hidden triggers. ”Heads up! This whole place is a minefield of traps!”

...

High above them, perched in the silence of the upper branches, Jay watched the scene with a look of profound disappointment. He looked at the remaining traps—his meticulously crafted, high-effort survival tools—being triggered by the clumsy chaos of Ethan and Germaine’s flight.

He let out a long, suffering sigh, muttering to himself. ”Unbelievable. They’re treating my tactical perimeter like a goddamn obstacle course. Just... wasting everything.”

He paused, glancing at the wolves now dangling helplessly in his nets, their legs kicking in the air. A small, pragmatic glint appeared in his grey eyes.

”Well...” Jay murmured, already reaching for his butchering knife. ”I guess I’ll be having wolf dish for a week. Silver lining.”

For the next few minutes, the forest became a blurred streak of green and brown. Ethan was a whirlwind of armored motion, leaping from branch to branch with a grace that contradicted his bulk. He still had Germaine tucked firmly against him, and while she was currently vibrating with a desire to stab him in the ribs, Ethan’s inner monologue was operating on a completely different frequency.

God, the view from here is great, he thought, a small, traitorous smile forming under his visor. A busty blonde in my arms, the wind in my... well, the wind is mostly hitting my armor, but still. This is practically a date. A very loud, very lethal date.

The romanticism was abruptly cut short by a WHOOSH of superheated air. Behind them, the Fulminar Wolves had stopped trying to be surgical and had started launching plasma fireballs blindly into the canopy.

”Holy—! Watch it!” Ethan shrieked, twisting his body mid-air to avoid a blast that nearly singed his backside. ”One more of those and my ass is going to be a well-done steak! I can’t die with a charred booty, it’s bad for the brand!”

In the distance, the shimmering distortion of the exit gate finally appeared, a beacon of hope and, more importantly, a return to a world where things didn’t try to eat his face. Ethan leaped one last time, his movements becoming sluggish as the adrenaline began to dip.

”I can’t... do this... anymore,” he wheezed under his breath, the sound of his heavy breathing echoing in the helmet. ”This is a nightmare. Who designed this? I’m done. I am officially retired from C-Rank Gates. This was a one-time deal. One. Single. Time. All for Mia’s tuition fees. Why is education so expensive? Why does it require me to fight magical wildlife in a shifting dimension?”

He imagined his peaceful future, a sanctuary of low-stakes combat. I’m going back to the E-Ranks. Back to my beautiful, squishy, uncomplicated ’Jiggle-Wiggle’ slimes. Just me and the gelatinous blobs of joy. No fire, no stakes, just... jiggle.

As he reached the apex of his jump, gravity reclaimed him. Ethan plummeted toward the earth like a fallen satellite. Below, the wolves had anticipated his landing. They had formed a perfect, suffocating circle, their throats glowing with gathered plasma, ready to incinerate the duo the moment they touched the dirt.

But they had fundamentally underestimated the glorious trash-bag that was Ethan.

He didn’t land; he impacted.

K-BOOOOOOM!

Ethan hit the ground with the force of a tactical nuke. A massive, concentric shockwave of pressure blasted outward, the sheer kinetic energy ripping through the soil and sending the encircling wolves flying in every direction. Some were slammed into jagged rocks with a sickening thud; others were launched backward, performing several involuntary, frantic backflips before their heads collided with the thick trunks of  trees. The sound was a series of definitive, synchronized THUDs as the wolves were knocked unconscious—or dead—instantly.

---

Listen, I know you’re all hyped for the siphoned abilities, You want the loot. You want the plasma. You want the muscle. But patience is a virtue—one that Ethan clearly doesn’t have, but you guys should! I’m introducing his existing skills slowly because they’re actually pretty great on their own (not bragging, just stating facts). The new stuff will hit harder if we don’t rush it. Hold your horses! 🐴💨