Hogwarts: I Am Such a Model Wizard

Chapter 303: Lockhart’s Dueling Club

Even Kyle hadn’t expected the little gift he gave Neville to become such a hit. Thanks to Neville’s enthusiastic word-of-mouth promotion, more and more students started showing up, eager to buy what they were calling “Anti-Demon Crystals.” It was a name they had invented themselves, but the mystique around it only fueled demand.

Fred and George were astonished. The next day at lunch, they tracked Kyle down at the Hufflepuff table and flanked him.

“Kyle, didn’t you say you weren’t interested in selling amulets?” Fred demanded. “Then why did half of Hogwarts turn up at breakfast wanting to buy these things?”

“And what is this Anti-Demon Crystal nonsense?” George asked suspiciously. “You’re not cooking up something valuable on the side and keeping it from us, are you?”

Kyle sighed. “It’s just a decorative amethyst—literally a Christmas ornament. I gave Neville one yesterday, and somehow, by this morning, the entire school is clamoring for them.”

Kyle rubbed his forehead, exasperated. Neville had wanted to buy one, but Kyle hadn’t been selling them and had just given him the amethyst as a gift. Neville had promised to spread the word, but Kyle hadn’t anticipated just how effectively he’d do so.

After listening to Kyle’s explanation, Fred and George grasped what had happened.

“Neville Longbottom…” they muttered in unison.

“If only he’d come to us sooner!”

The twins exchanged a look, both thinking of all the Galleons they could have raked in if they’d been ahead of the trend. As soon as they finished their meal, they rushed through one of Hogwarts’ secret passages to Hogsmeade and bought every large amethyst they could find.

Back at the castle, Kyle used a spell to cut each one into the pointed crystal shapes he remembered from his childhood. For an extra touch, he decided to add a homemade pepper bomb to the base of each crystal. This would create a smokescreen of pepper-infused fog if the crystal was broken, allowing for a quick escape in a pinch. It was a hit.

Fred and George ended up making three trips to Hogsmeade for restocks, and on their final trip, they even cleared out Dervish & Banges’ entire supply of amethysts. Kyle had to admit he’d underestimated the market; the anxiety over the Chamber of Secrets had made students willing to spend ten Sickles for a little peace of mind. Even without high-end Slytherin customers, they’d made a small fortune.

The only downside was that Hogwarts soon had a lingering scent of pepper. Every day, some young wizard would accidentally drop their crystal, setting off the pepper bomb, and Neville seemed to be the unluckiest of all. He was going through crystals at an alarming rate—nearly one every two days. Eventually, Fred and George felt so bad for him that they started giving him discounts, even refunding what he’d previously spent, to the point where they lost money on him.

Meanwhile, Harry and Ron, who shared a dorm with Neville, weren’t thrilled with the craze. They grumbled more than once that every meal now tasted faintly of pepper.

”I think you two should get one too; this isn’t like those useless onions and salamander tails,” Hermione told them.

”The crystal itself lets you check around corners, the smoke blocks visibility, and the pepper can mess with a creature’s sense of smell. Kyle really thought this through. Whatever the monster is, this crystal would come in handy.”

“Maybe you’re right…” Ron said with a shrug, “but if you had a roommate like Neville, you wouldn’t be saying that.”

And with that, the days sped by, bringing December and its cold weather. One morning, a new rumor circulated: Lockhart had discovered that professors could start clubs, so he’d petitioned Dumbledore for permission to create one himself.

As Kyle, Kanna, and Cedric arrived for breakfast, they noticed a fresh piece of parchment pinned to the notice board in the foyer.

“What’s that?” Cedric asked, leaning closer to read it.

“The school is starting a Duelling Club!” an eager Gryffindor ahead of them exclaimed. “First meeting is tonight, at eight o’clock in the Great Hall!”

“Finally!” someone said. “About time they started teaching us dueling. It could be really useful.”

“Ha... as if any of those Slytherin goons would ever duel us fair and square,” came a skeptical voice. Kyle turned to see Ron, though it was obvious he was interested too.

“Hello, Kyle,” Hermione greeted him. “Are you going to this Duelling Club?”

“Yeah,” Kyle nodded. “I’ve got some free time tonight, and it sounds interesting.”

“We’re going too,” she said, glancing at Harry and Ron. “You never know—it could be useful.”

“Of course we’re going,” Ron muttered, “I just hope there’s no pepper there.”

Harry nodded beside him, as both boys had been cautious around their meals lately, each dish carrying a faint peppery scent from Neville’s frequent “crystal mishaps.”

By eight o’clock that evening, the Great Hall had transformed completely. The long tables had been removed, replaced by a gilded stage against one wall, glowing under the light of hundreds of floating candles. When Kyle and his friends arrived, the hall was packed with students, nearly the entire school, each holding their wand and buzzing with anticipation.

“Who do you think is going to teach us?” Cho wondered aloud. “Could it be Professor Dumbledore?”

“Or Professor Flitwick,” Cedric suggested. “He was a dueling champion back in the day. He’d be perfect for it.”

“Maybe neither,” Fred muttered, eyeing the golden stage. “This showy setup looks like the work of someone I know.”

Moments later, Lockhart strode onto the stage, beaming in a long, plum-colored robe. Snape trailed behind him, his expression as sour as ever.

“Knew it,” Fred groaned. “No one else would put on such a garish show except that peacock.”

“And Snape…” George sighed. “This couldn’t get worse. Is it too late to sneak out?”

Kanna glanced back at the Great Hall doors, which had already closed behind the throng of students. “Looks like it is.”

Onstage, Lockhart waved his arms grandly for silence. “Gather round, come closer!” he called. “In light of recent events, Professor Dumbledore has kindly agreed to let me start this little Duelling Club to teach you all a thing or two about defending yourselves in times of danger.”

He gestured to Snape. “I’d also like to thank Professor Snape, who has graciously agreed to assist me. A truly generous man.”

Snape’s face twisted slightly at that remark. If he didn’t need Dumbledore’s approval on his Potions requisition forms, he would never have agreed to assist Lockhart with this absurd club.

Lockhart, oblivious to Snape’s darkening expression, continued with a grin, “Now, don’t worry—it’s just a demonstration, and I’ll be careful with my spellwork. I promise to return your Potions professor to you in one piece.”

Snape’s eyes narrowed as he stared daggers at Lockhart, his expression growing icier by the second, as though he was picturing Harry standing before him.