Gun of Ashes

”Human beings certainly possess indelible vices, but they also possess brilliant virtues. If I were to choose which virtue is the most precious, for me, it would probably be courage.”

The queen’s movements seemed very difficult. She sat beside Lorenzo with great effort, her slender, pale legs dangling in the air.

”Courage?”

This word was too insignificant for Lorenzo. If the queen hadn’t brought it up, he would have almost forgotten its existence.

”You might think that this word is very ordinary, right? But quite the opposite, it is so precious that few people truly possess it.”

The queen slowly recounted, she rarely engaged in such deep communication throughout her life. Ever since she donned this crown and learned this secret, she has lived in fear every day.

”I am someone who lacks courage. If I were filled with courage and dared to do things without knowing the consequences, I might not have become queen. Perhaps when I was young, I would have escaped the Platinum Palace, seen the outside world, and then died.”

The queen glanced back at Arthur and then said with a smile.

”That’s also why I let Owes go with you, Arthur, that child possesses the courage I never had. He dares to take that step, even if the outcome is terrible... truly enviable.”

Although she is Queen Victoria, like everyone in the Victoria family, the queen’s life has been confined to this luxurious palace, bound by countless powers to the throne.

”Courage, bravery, such ordinary words that anyone can claim to possess. But when it’s time to prove it all, people shrink back, afraid. Faced with danger, most people lose the ability to be brave and can only stop at the edge.”

After a brief pause, the queen continued to speak.

”Actually, this doesn’t mean people aren’t brave. They do possess the courage to face danger, but they lack the courage to bear the price that danger brings.”

The queen repeated again.

”It is the cost that we fear.”

The sound echoed in this desolate graveyard, and under the gaze of the iron corpses, the atmosphere here softened. Arthur watched the two of them, reminding him of the scene in the church, where believers confessed to the priest, telling of life’s sufferings.

The queen was that suffering believer. She seemed to be explaining all this to Lorenzo, but more so it was akin to a self-confession. The Platinum Palace was so vast, yet from beginning to end, no one could understand the queen’s pain, and she couldn’t pass on this cursed knowledge.

”Whether it’s you or others in the Purification Mechanism, I know that most of you are heinous individuals, the kind who’d get the death sentence right out of the gate in a court of law.

You are filthy all over, possessing all sorts of human vices. But I must say, even such dirty people have noble souls.

You possess something I never had. Whatever your purpose, when faced with the unknown evil anomaly, you have the courage to draw your sword, even if it means bearing death or even heavier costs afterwards.”

The queen then spoke about one of the reasons for going to war, at least in her view, part of the responsibility lay with herself.

”I also know that war only brings pain, but I don’t have the courage to make a change. As you said, using the technology here to counter the expansion of the Demon, I know all of this, and I know more in detail than you do. The Third Generation Armor is already capable of being mass-produced. Ingwig’s military strength is unprecedentedly powerful...

But I am afraid, Lorenzo Holmes. What if we fail? What if we lose the war against the Demon?”

The queen was asking Lorenzo, but even more, she was talking to herself. Her face was pale, her pupils filled with the same fear, her body trembling slightly, as if she might fall at any moment.

At this moment, she was just like an ordinary person, in fear, trembling.

”I don’t have that kind of courage, I don’t even dare to imagine what failure looks like. These duties press on me, leaving me breathless. All I can do in the end is blindly follow through with population reduction.”

Suddenly, she grabbed Lorenzo’s hand, forcing him to reach toward her neck, but she had no strength at all, the act comically absurd.

”Why not... kill me, let you all take this power, to do what you want, just don’t make me bear this any longer...”

The mad murmur quickly ended as the queen realized her absurdity, slowly letting go of his hand, silently bowing her head.

Lorenzo looked at the queen with pity. She was just an ordinary person, unfortunately born into the Victoria family, burdened with the King’s Curse. Her life was trapped in this Platinum Palace, never truly free, and she thought she was already unlucky enough, but such events continued to occur during her reign.

The endless stream of events was almost enough to crush this woman.

Lorenzo and Arthur tacitly maintained silence, giving the queen some time to compose herself in this place, protected by an Anti-Meme, where she could shed her crown.

It was unclear how long this lasted before the queen slowly spoke.

”Of course, it’s not just courage and other cliché words, there are also elements of the era. This might be our last chance to fight back.”