The Forsaken Hero

The Star Guard hovered around me, exchanging looks. I could feel their curiosity, the weight of countless questions regarding my homeworld, but I wiped my eyes and slipped through them, continuing down the path. Whatever courage had driven me to speak of Earth had vanished, swallowed up in the anguish that threatened to consume me once more.

I just couldn’t understand. Why did Luke have to leave me? Everything had been going so well! I’d just gotten comfortable kissing him! So few of my visions had covered the time between the fall of the Risen and the start of the war. I had nothing to go on, no hints at what had caused this. Had I done something wrong? Did he decide that love wasn’t worth it, after all?

”My Lady?”

Luxxa’s voice pierced my thoughts, and I looked up, startled to see my aura writing like an agitated sea. Gith flinched, his eyes flickering gold as it overtook him, only to fade a moment later. He shook his head as if clearing his thoughts, gripping the hilt of his long, curved knife tightly.

”Sorry!” I hurriedly restrained my aura, but as before, it refused to listen. Panic made my chest tighten as, on the other side of the manor grounds, almost a mile away, I felt an elderly gardener succumb to my power. And then a maid sweeping a hallway, and an artisan on his way past the outer gates.

”You have to calm down,” Luxxa said, taking me by the shoulders, forcing me to look at her. Her steadying grip helped calm my racing heart, but I just couldn’t. Every time I tried to take a deep breath, my worries clouded my mind, and my aura reflected that. For how could anything else compare to Luke? How could I forget what he’d said to me?

Haven. In Haven, I was safe.

I clung to the thought, summoning my staff and opening a gate. With a strangled sob, I plunged through it, embracing the surge of warmth and mana. It was a salve to my soul, and as I stumbled through the other side, I managed to breathe, drawing shaky breaths. A single tear slid down my cheek, but I quickly scrubbed it away. I wasn’t going to cry over Luke again. I wasn’t!

But there was little comfort to be found in Haven, far less than I’d hoped for. Even as I looked up, desperate to bathe in the starlight, the skies darkened. The stars retreated, growing distant and cold. The air thickened with every breath, making every breath difficult. Shadows deepened, emerging from their hiding places and crawling around the islands.

”No, no, no,” I whispered, sinking to my knees. Not here, too! Why was it so hard find peace?

Haven materialized, worry creasing his brow. The spirit hovered a few inches off the ground, seeming to loom over me, before it touched down. I flinched as he gently took me by the hands and raised me.

”Oh, Haven,” I mumbled, falling against him. ”I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to bring this here.”

Approaching auras caused me to burrow deeper into his arms, though hiding behind a translucent being was rather pointless.

”Xiviyah!” Korra’s voice cut through the oppressive air like a knife, slicing into my heart. The patter of her feet against the ground announced her landing. Haven vanished, and I stumbled forward, letting out a dismayed squeak. Before I could fall, I was caught up in another embrace, this one warm and living. I collapsed into it, breathing in the scent of ran and sea salt.

”Korra,” I whispered, closing my eyes as she stroked the back of my head.

”What happened? We were just sparring, but then...this happened.” Her hand left my back for a moment, gesturing. I pressed my face further into her chest, but I didn’t have to see to know what she was gesturing at.

I felt the tickle of flames as Gayron landed beside us. ”Looks like Ernyst was right. Then that bit about the realm reflecting her?”

I felt Korra nod, and she brought her hand around my head, caressing my cheek with a gentle touch. It settled on my cheek, tilting my head up, forcing me to look at her. Her eyes narrowed as she saw the tears gathered in the corner of my eyes.

”Is everything alright? Why are you so...dark?” she asked.

I tried to swallow, tried to speak, but my throat was too tight. I just shook my head, freeing myself of her grip, and hid against her again.

”Luxxa, what happened?” she demanded.

”She was like this when she called for the maids this morning,” Luxxa answered. ”She pretended everything was alright, but then, well...we may have inadvertently made it worse.”

”Make it worse?” Korra’s arms tightened around me. ”How?”

”We...I...asked about her home.”

”And she answered?” Korra gasped, anger forgotten. ”What did she say? No, that’s not important. What happened?”

”She seemed fine, but when I brought up Luke, she...came here.”

”Luke?” Korra’s voice hardened. ”Xiv, what did he do? Did he hurt you?”

”There’s nothing wrong. I’m fine, see?” I asked, looking up, forcing a bright smile. It felt brittle on my face.

”Like hell you are. Did he try and force you to--”

”No!” My cheeks warmed at the thought. ”Nothing like that.”

”If that were true, then what’s this?” she asked, cupping my cheek. Her thumb brushed the corner of my eye, coming away wet.

I ducked my head, squirming out of her arms. ”I’m just fine. It’s just...harder than I thought it would be. But I’m trying.”

”Trying what?”

I looked down, gripping my skirt with both hands. ”It’s really nothing. You don’t need to worry. I just came here to see Fate. Bethiv wants to remain behind with some of the Last Light Company, and they need a place to stay.”

”Remain behind? Are the rest of them going somewhere? To Brithlite? I thought they were--no, you’re just changing the subject. Was it a dream, or a vision? Did you see something sad again?”

”I always see something sad,” I murmured, releasing my dress and scrubbing my eyes with the back of my sleeve. ”Please, you don’t have to worry about me. I’m going to be strong. I promise.”

Pushing past her, my eyes firmly on the ground, I ignored her protests and walked away. I could feel her presence on me, her hesitation. I tensed as I heard her take a breath, but she just slowly exhaled again.

As I began across the floating bridge, my shoulders sagged, and I took a shaky breath, relieved she let me go. I didn’t know what I would do if she pressed me. What was I supposed to say? That Luke abandoned me? That he’d gone to rally his forces? That he didn’t love me anymore? I wish I knew which one of those was true.

But I didn’t. So I could only choose to doubt or believe. And right now, I was going to believe. That meant I wasn’t going to cry. And if I stayed in Korra’s arms, warm and safe, I most certainly would. I’d explain everything once I wasn’t feeling so raw and weak.

Remnants gathered as I progressed across the islands. I recognized almost all of them by now, by face if not by name, but none approached or offered me cheerful greetings as they often did. They watched solemnly from a distance, restlessly drifting in the astral breeze.

Gathrin waited for me at the gate of the city, resting with his hands on the crossguard of his massive broadsword, the tip driven into the cobblestone road. There was no way around him, so I managed a smile.

”Gathrin, how are you?”

He watched me for a moment too long, and I shifted, my tail twitching.

At last, he said, ”I would inquire that of you, but I fear I already know the answer. You should be more careful with your feelings. This realm beats to your heart, and moves with your will. And when you are sad?” his voice fell dangerously low. ”Even we remnants begin to feel a little more dark. A little less tolerant of the world that hurt you.”

I shivered at the chill in his voice. ”I don’t mean to. I’m just...trying.”

”I know, and it’s not fair to you. No child is meant to possess an aura like yours. But you have it, and you must learn to control it. Such is the burden on your shoulders. I trust that’s why you’ve come to speak with Fate?”

I nodded, and he turned without another word, leading me inside. As we walked across the cold, forsaken streets, I waited for him to leave, but he didn’t. He strode confidently aside me, a firm, unshakable mountain. I walked a little closer to him.

The Cathedral was dimmer than the rest of the realm, the stars on the ceiling little more than silver flecks amid the inky darkness. When we entered the chapel, I looked toward the shard, but found it empty. I turned to Gathrin, questioning, and he nodded to the western corridor, leading into the depths below.

”She’s down there?” I whispered, peering into the darkness.

”You know the way?” he asked.

My tail rustled, swishing nervously. ”Are you coming with me?”

”I’ll remain here. Call me through Haven if you need me.”

I swallowed the lump in my throat and took a breath. Squaring my shoulders and stilling my tail, I entered the corridor. The hall of heroes past, a record of every mortal that had ever fought alongside Fate. And at the end, I knew, was the beginning. And there, Fate was waiting.