The Captain's Dirty Little Secret

Chapter 328: Chapter 328 - The Count Was Gone

The words stung mostly because Roxie agreed.

Karen touched Kendall’s arm. ”She recovered.”

”I know she recovered.” Kendall looked at her, then back at Roxie. ”But I saw how close it was. A captain making that mistake?”

That landed harder.

Roxie looked down for a moment. The phone had taken one second from her. That was all. One second had been enough for Kendall to see it from across the floor, enough for Karen to reach her mark while Roxie was still hesitating, enough that if the timing had been slightly different, the rest of the team could have been scrambling around a mistake Roxie caused.

Or going home because of it.

That was harder to swallow.

Kendall’s expression eased slightly, but the anger was still there.

”Hey, stop that.” Ava stepped between them. ”We did it. I’m sure Roxie knows.”

Kendall stared at Ava before looking at Roxie again, and somehow that silence made Roxie feel worse. She could still hear the missed count inside her head, still feel that tiny hesitation in her foot as everyone else moved without her.

”I’m sorry,” Roxie muttered.

Kendall breathed out hard, and some of the tension finally left her shoulders.

Coach Miller came through the curtain behind them, and the team gradually quieted as everyone turned toward him. He took his time looking over the girls before a smile finally appeared.

”That was your best run so far.”

The girls erupted again.

Angela grabbed Roxie around the shoulders while Ava screamed somewhere beside them, and Roxie smiled because she was happy. She really was. Goddamn it, though, she also knew how close she had come to screwing up the routine.

Angela hugged her tighter. ”Don’t mind Kendall. You reacted in time. That’s what matters.”

Karen nodded beside her.

Roxie smiled wider because both of them looked like they needed her to believe it. ”Yeah.”

She was proud of the routine and proud of the team. They had hit their hardest sections cleanly, and the final pyramid had felt better than it ever had in practice. Still, Roxie remained painfully aware of the single second nobody else was celebrating.

Coach Miller clapped his hands. ”Water. Cool down. We still have results.”

That quieted everyone quickly.

Right. Results.

The semifinal had felt strong, but every team remaining at Nationals was good enough that a small hesitation could matter. Roxie had no idea whether the judges had noticed hers. Maybe from where they sat it had looked like part of the choreography.

Kendall had noticed, though, and that was enough to keep Roxie from dismissing it.

Roxie reached for her water bottle and took a long drink. Her hands had stopped shaking and her breathing had finally settled, but the count still came back inside her head.

Five, six, seven.

The phone.

Eight.

Her foot still half a beat behind.

She tightened her grip around the bottle.

”Stop,” she whispered.

Karen looked at her. ”What?”

”Nothing.”

Waiting for the results somehow felt worse after that.

They changed out of their competition shoes, cooled down, and eventually joined the other teams gathered near the large screens where the finalists would be announced. The hallway was packed with athletes in uniform, coaches standing behind them, and families trying to see past rows of shoulders.

Roxie stood between Karen and Angela while Kendall waited a few feet away.

They had barely spoken since backstage.

Roxie hated that too.

The screen changed.

The finalist announcement began.

One school appeared, and cheers erupted somewhere behind them. Another followed, then another.

Roxie clasped her hands together. She had spent most of Nationals thinking about how badly she wanted Briarwick to make it this far. Now that the answer was only seconds away, all she could think about was how easily she could have taken it from them.

Angela reached for her hand.

Roxie held on.

Another school appeared.

Karen whispered, ”Come on.”

Then Briarwick appeared.

For a moment, Roxie simply stared.

Maybe everybody around her had already started screaming and she just stopped hearing them, because the only thing she could see was Briarwick High School sitting among the finalists.

Angela screamed directly beside her ear. ”We made it!”

Karen grabbed Roxie so hard she nearly knocked her sideways, and suddenly the entire team exploded around them. Ava started crying again. Girls jumped into each other’s arms while Coach Miller laughed and tried to calm everyone down even though there was no chance of that happening.

National finalists.

They were actually going to Finals.

Relief hit Roxie so hard that her eyes immediately burned.

Angela hugged her again. ”We fucking made it!”

Roxie laughed against her shoulder. ”We made it.”

This time she believed the words when she said them.

Across the group, Kendall looked at her.

Roxie expected to see some of the same anger from backstage, but Kendall only gave her a small nod.

Roxie returned it.

The rest could wait.

Right now, they were finalists.

By the time they returned to the hotel, nobody wanted to spend the evening sitting around their rooms. Half the team wanted to go somewhere for dinner, and Coach Miller eventually agreed after making everyone promise they would stay together and come straight back afterward.

Roxie almost backed out.

The thought came the moment everyone started discussing where to eat. She wanted a shower, her bed, and enough quiet to stop hearing Kendall’s voice inside her head.

Going out and pretending she felt like celebrating sounded exhausting when part of her still felt ashamed every time she remembered that missing second.

Then she looked around at the girls arguing over restaurants.

They had made Finals.

All of them had.

Roxie could disappear into her room and punish herself if she wanted, but that would bring her mood into a night the team deserved to enjoy. Briarwick had spent months learning how to move as one unit. She was still part of that unit, even when she felt like hiding from everyone.

So Roxie went.

The restaurant they found was loud enough that several conversations could happen across the same table without anyone really following all of them. Roxie liked that more than she expected. It gave her somewhere to hide while still being part of everything.

Angela ordered enough food for two people and immediately defended herself when Karen pointed it out.

”I burned calories.”

”You did one routine.”

”A national semifinal routine. It was stressful. My brain burned double the calories.”

”It’s fine.” Karen sighed and glanced at Roxie before lowering her voice. ”It all goes to her chest anyway.”

Roxie burst out laughing while Angela smacked Karen’s arm.

”Fuck you.”

The laugh came easier than Roxie expected.

They had pushed several tables together, and for the first time since leaving the competition hall, everyone started looking like regular teenagers again instead of athletes waiting for scores.

Ava kept opening pictures from the finalist announcement and passing her phone around. Someone had caught the exact moment Angela started screaming. Another showed Karen nearly tackling Roxie sideways.

Even Kendall eventually relaxed.

She never apologized for what she had said backstage, and Roxie never expected her to. Kendall had been angry because she cared about the routine and because, as much as Roxie hated admitting it, she had been right.

That thought still slipped back between bites.

Roxie pushed it away and reached across the table for another fry.

Coach Miller finally stood and tapped his glass with a fork.

Several girls groaned.

”I haven’t even said anything yet.”

”That usually means instructions,” Karen said.

”It is instructions.”

More groaning followed.

Coach Miller rolled his eyes. ”Tomorrow is mostly media and scheduled activities for the finalist teams. There’ll be interviews, some photos, and a get together with the other finalists.”

Roxie stopped chewing.

Interviews.

Great.

Coach Miller continued before she could sink too far into that thought. ”Finals are the day after. Tomorrow is lighter, but that is not permission to do something stupid tonight. I need everyone sharp when we get back on that floor.”

The girls nodded.

Karen leaned toward Angela. ”Some teams are going out tonight.”

Angela lowered her voice. ”I heard some of them were drinking after prelims.”

Coach Miller looked directly toward them from the other end of the table.

Karen immediately sat straighter. ”We were discussing hydration.”

Roxie snorted into her drink.

Coach Miller stared at them for another moment before returning to his conversation with one of the girls.

Karen waited until he looked away.

”One beer wouldn’t kill anybody.”

Angela looked genuinely scandalized. ”You drink beer?”

”No. Beer tastes like piss.”

”Then why did you say beer?”

”I was making a point.”

Roxie shook her head. ”You’re both idiots.”

Karen looked at her. ”You want something later?”

Normally Roxie would have answered immediately.

She had never liked alcohol much. She liked being in control of herself, and getting drunk had never held much appeal.

Tonight, though, her shoulders still felt tight. Her mind had been grinding through the same moment since they left the arena, and tomorrow she had interviews waiting for her before Finals even arrived.

Roxie stabbed another fry into ketchup.

”Maybe a little.”

Angela’s mouth fell open.

Karen grinned. ”Well, damn.”

”Shut up. I said a little.”

”You realize Zac is going to blame me.”

”Zac can survive.”

Karen’s grin widened. ”I like this version of you.”

”Keep talking and she disappears.”

”I’m done.”

Roxie laughed again.

After dinner they returned to the hotel, but instead of separating immediately, Roxie followed Karen and Angela into their room. Ava came for a while too, along with two other girls, but eventually they drifted out until it was mostly the three of them sprawled around the room.

Karen produced a bottle from her bag.

Angela stared at her. ”Where the hell did you even get that?”

Karen smiled innocently. ”I have resources.”

Roxie sat cross legged near the end of the bed. ”If Coach Miller finds out, I’m blaming both of you.”

”You’re a captain,” Angela said. ”If anyone gets blamed first, it’s probably you.”

Roxie smiled, but the word captain caught somewhere unpleasant inside her.

A captain making that mistake?

The smile almost slipped.

Karen seemed to notice because she started pouring immediately. ”Anyway, nobody is getting caught.”

She mixed the alcohol with something sweet enough that Roxie could barely taste it at first.

That was probably dangerous.

Roxie took a sip, frowned, then tried another.

”It tastes like juice.”

Karen looked pleased with herself. ”Exactly.”

They talked about everything except cheer for a while, and Roxie was grateful for it.

Karen complained about somebody stealing her lip gloss that morning. Angela told a ridiculous story about nearly walking into the wrong hotel room. Roxie laughed until her stomach hurt, and somewhere during the second cup, she realized the muscles across her shoulders had finally loosened.

The room felt warmer.

So did her face.

She leaned back against the headboard and listened to Karen and Angela argue about whether some celebrity was attractive while the conversation blurred pleasantly around her.

For the first time all day, the count was gone.

Roxie smiled into her cup.

Angela looked at her. ”Why are you smiling like that?”

”I’m happy.”

Karen squinted at her. ”You’re tipsy.”

”I’m happy.”

”That too.”

Roxie giggled.

Karen immediately pointed at her. ”Oh my God.”

”What?”

”You giggled.”

”I laugh.”

”That was a giggle.”

”Fuck off.”

Angela was already laughing.

Roxie threw a pillow at both of them.

By the time she finally stood to leave, she was steady enough to walk normally, although the warmth in her face had spread all the way to her ears.

Karen followed her to the door. ”Text when you get there.”

Roxie stared at her. ”It’s down the hall.”

”You’re still texting.”

”You sound like Zac.”

”That is deeply offensive. I’m not that obsessed.”

Roxie laughed and stepped into the hallway.

The hotel felt unusually quiet after Karen and Angela’s room. Roxie walked toward hers with a smile still lingering on her face, feeling lighter than she had since waking up that morning.

She knew everything would come back eventually. Tomorrow there would be interviews. After that, Finals. The phones would still exist. Kendall had still seen her falter.

Tonight, though, her mind had finally stopped chewing on it.

Roxie opened the door.

Zac was sitting on the bed with his phone in his hand.

He looked up immediately.

”There’s my national finalist.”

Roxie smiled so hard her cheeks hurt.

Then she crossed the room and threw herself at him.

Zac barely got his phone onto the mattress before catching her around the waist.

”Whoa.”

Roxie wrapped both arms around his neck and kissed him hard.

Zac froze for half a second before kissing her back. Roxie smiled against his mouth and kissed him again simply because she wanted to. Her hands moved into his hair while Zac tightened his arms around her waist.

When she finally pulled back, he stared at her.

Roxie smiled. ”What?”

Zac narrowed his eyes.

”What?”

His mouth twitched. ”Have you been drinking?”

Roxie gasped. ”That is very accusatory, and I don’t drink.”

Zac laughed.

She tried to look offended, but the expression lasted about two seconds before she started laughing too.

”Oh, shit.” Zac looked at her flushed cheeks. ”You have.”

”I had two.”

”Two what?”

Roxie thought about it.

”I don’t know.”

That made him laugh harder.

”Karen made them.”

”Obviously.”

”They were sweet.”

”Also obviously.”

Roxie rolled her eyes and kissed him again.

This time Zac was still smiling when their mouths met. His hand moved up her back as Roxie pressed closer, and the warmth already moving through her body seemed to spread everywhere he touched.

She pulled away just far enough to look at him.

”We made Finals.”

”I heard.”

”We’re national finalists.”

”I know, babe.”

Roxie smiled again, but something shifted inside her chest.

She was happy. She could still feel it underneath the warmth in her face and the pleasant lightness in her head. But happiness had apparently made room for everything else instead of replacing it.

Zac noticed.

His smile softened as he studied her face.

Roxie knew that look.

He was about to ask.

So she kissed him again.

Zac kissed her back, but Roxie could feel the difference immediately. He was letting her lead while paying far more attention to her than the kiss itself.

That annoyed her.

She pulled him closer anyway.

She had spent the entire evening finally getting her thoughts to quiet down. She wanted another hour before she had to think about Kendall, the phone, that missing count, or how close she had come to making the worst mistake of her season.

Tomorrow could have all of that.

Tonight, she only wanted Zac.