Shinrabansho: Myriad Souls

The café smelled like butter, sugar, and fresh bread no matter how long you were there, feeling warm and comforting in a way that lingered even after the plates were mostly cleared. Sunlight filtered through lace curtains, catching on white tabletops and the rims of half-empty cups. Small vases of dried flowers sat between tables, their muted colors softening the room. Somewhere near the counter, a radio played something old and gentle, a melody that felt like it had been around longer than anyone.

The café hummed quietly. Cups clinked. Someone laughed softly. It was the kind of place where nothing demanded anything from you.

I stared down at what was left of my cake, my fork resting against the plate. Riko had eaten most of it for me. I didn’t feel like I deserved to eat much of it.

Yuna watched me for a moment before speaking.

“Ne, how long before your parents get back from their trip?” she asked gently.

I bit my lip. “I don’t know… just sometime tonight.”

“That’s about expected,” Yuna said. “I’m thinking that your mother probably won’t want to cook dinner. Do you have a plan for a meal for everyone?”

“…No,” I admitted. “I hadn’t thought about it. I’m sorry.” I clapped my hands and bowed my head.

She nodded once, as if she’d already expected that. “I have a proposal! We can stop at a grocery store and buy some ingredients on our way back to your house. I will help you with cooking tonight. Actually, I think that we all should work together this time.”

Haru winced. “I don’t…”

“It’s fine if you don’t help us with cooking, but make sure that you help carry our groceries.” Yuna flashed Haru a warm smile.

Haru flushed and nodded, straightening. “No true man would let girls carry everything.”

Yuna’s lips quirked up a little more in the corners as she nodded.

The idea landed on me softly. Her plan wasn’t too overwhelming or demanding, although I knew I could handle it anyway. When it came to cooking, I always worked seriously. But honestly, I liked the idea of cooking together.

I couldn’t help smiling a little as I asked, “What should we cook? I’m good at making Cream Stew.”

“Delicious,” Riko grinned immediately.

Yuna tilted her head, considering. “How about something simpler? Something we all could make… a delicious curry.”

I nodded without hesitation. “That’s fine! I know how to make that too. It was one of the first things Mom taught me how to cook because of how simple it is.”

“Me too! My little sisters love when I make curry,” Riko said. “I think most everyone at this table approves, right?” She glanced at Haru.

He shrugged. “Sounds good to me. I’d be fine with eating anything.”

He was quieter than usual. Watching and listening to us chatting.

He’s more sensitive… or thoughtful than he seems, I thought distantly.

“Are we all in agreement?” Yuna asked.

We nodded together.

The grocery store smelled faintly of produce, seafood, and cleaning products. They had just mopped the floor, and little warning signs had been set up here and there. The fluorescent lights buzzed softly overhead. Yuna took the lead, moving through the aisles like she had already mapped the whole place in her head.

“Do you have enough cooking oil?” she asked, pausing by the shelves.

“…Yes,” I said after a moment, thinking it through. I nodded. “We definitely do.”

“Good. Then we’ll get just enough of everything else.”

Haru followed behind us, smiling, holding the shopping basket like it was his sovereign duty.

Riko walked beside him with a teasing grin. “If it gets too loaded up, don’t hesitate to pass some of it to me.”

Haru smirked. “I’ll carry it all. Don’t underestimate me.”

“Good. Make sure you live up to those words.” Riko cackled in a way that made Haru’s lips twist.

Yuna selected an onion, a bulb of garlic, a knot of fresh ginger, stubby and thick carrots, and a bag of potatoes. Haru winced when the potatoes weighed the basket down, but he didn’t complain. She added things one by one to Haru’s basket. When we reached the aisle with seasonings, she picked up some curry powder.

“My favorite brand. If you make it properly, the curry always turns out delicious.” Yuna beamed.

Riko arched a brow. “I’m surprised we’re not getting Golden or Java. Or mixing them.”

“Is that what you make for your little sisters?” I asked, smirking.

Riko turned pink and looked away. “I can’t wait to eat,” she said, as though she hadn’t just eaten both her cake and mine and wasn’t going to help us cook.

I rolled my eyes in mild amusement.

Yuna giggled and added turmeric, cumin, and some mild chili powder to Haru’s basket.

We kept shopping, adding more ingredients as we went. Beef stock. An apple. Tomato paste. Soy sauce. Worcestershire sauce. Butter. With every new thing, Haru’s face tightened more, his fingers whitening around the handle.

“Do you have flour for the roux, Sumire-chan?” Yuna asked.

“Yes,” I said quickly. “Mom always keeps plenty in the house for special occasions, birthdays, and whenever she makes sweets.”

Yuna smiled at that and added a pack of fukujinzuke.

Haru started sweating.

“Be glad we don’t need to buy flour. Those bags are pretty heavy,” I whispered.

Haru pressed his lips together.

We kept walking, and Yuna paused at the meats section. “What meat would everyone like? Beef, chicken, or pork?”

“Pork,” Haru said immediately, forgetting his troubles for a moment.

We all looked at him. He managed to grin.

“…Yeah,” I said. “Pork sounds good to me too.”

Riko nodded. “Agreed.”

“Do we want to simmer it in the curry, or make tonkatsu on the side?” I asked.

“Simmering it would be easiest. It’ll still be delicious,” Yuna said, reaching for a reasonably priced pack of pork from the chilled case.

Haru shivered under the weight of the basket.

I intercepted the meat and took it from Yuna before it could go in.

“Onee-chan,” Haru complained. He gestured with effort at the basket. “Give it to me.”

“Nope.” I stuck out my tongue and started toward the registers.

Back home, Haru disappeared into his room with a quick, “I’ll stay out of your way,” probably to boot up his games and rest his arms.

The kitchen slowly filled with movement and sound as we started preparing the ingredients.

“You’re on carrots and potatoes duty.” Yuna winked at me.

I nodded and got to work, peeling the carrots and potatoes, being careful and neat, letting the rhythm of it steady my hands and the trembling in my chest.

A small memory flashed through me while I worked. A different sink. Potato peelings with too much potato still attached. Tiny, lopsided potatoes beside the ones that still had their skins and looked much bigger.

Was I really that bad?

A small body hugged me from behind and the memory and sensation faded. Yuna pressed her breasts against my back and peeked over my shoulder as she hugged me. “They look great. Please cut them into large chunks.”

I nodded. I didn’t need any instructions, but I didn’t mind it.

“Stop slacking off just to hug Sumire-chan.” Riko pouted as she cut the ends off an onion, sliced through the papery skin, peeled away the dry outer layers, and almost immediately started crying.

“Oh, kami.” She laughed, wiping at her eyes. “Why do onions have to be like this? It’s like a tiny violin orchestra every time I cut into one.”

I giggled faintly, and Yuna beamed as she returned to her place and efficiently chopped an apple, then tipped it into a blender with a little water. Loud whirring filled the kitchen as the chunks turned to applesauce. After that, she grated ginger and garlic. Their scents spread through the room, warm and aromatic, mixing with the sweet note of apple and the sharp, savory smell of onion until the kitchen already smelled rich, like the curry to come.

Then Yuna took the spices and measured them out carefully with spoons, making her own blend. I leaned toward her, touched a fingertip to the mixture, and licked it clean.

“This mix is perfect.” I smiled as the raw flavors coated my tongue. Once it bloomed in the roux, it would taste amazing.

When Riko finished with the onions, her eyes were still full of tears, and Yuna quickly handed her the pork. “Please cut it into rough cubes.”

Riko snapped a playful salute, wiping at her cheeks with a crisp, dramatic flourish. “Roger.”

She worked quickly, slicing through the slippery meat and laughing as she cut it into pieces she could cube. “It’s always so slimy and hard to work with… just like Aoi.”

Her words landed wrong and I froze.

Yuna froze too.

My chest seized. Tears spilled before I could stop them, and I glared. “She’s not a bad person, Riko!” I sobbed. “Don’t insult my Aoi-chan like that!”

“My Aoi-chan…” Riko winced, her lips tightening.

Yuna immediately dropped what she was doing and wrapped her arms around me, pulling me close. “Apologize, Riko,” she said firmly. “Even though we’re all angry right now, there’s no reason to badmouth her.”

Riko flinched, her jaw tightening. “Why are you defending and clinging to her like this after what she did to you, Sumire-chan?” she snapped.

My eyes widened and I gasped, crying against Yuna’s chest. “It wasn’t like that… I asked her to…”

“She used you and dumped you after she got her fill of you. Just get over tr… get over it!”

I’m a jerk. That’s who I really am, Sumire. I was using you to get what I wanted in this life. Do you get it? You shouldn’t love trash like me.

My heart seized.

Yuna bit her lip. “That’s…”

“They definitely had sex,” Riko said sharply, her fists clenched. “I don’t know exactly what they did, but she wouldn’t be crying like this if…”

Yuna turned to her, her eyes sharp. “How are you so sure of all this?”

“…Didn’t you see all the marks on her body when we changed her into her pajamas?” Riko said, her voice shaking now. “Her thighs… her neck… her…” She shook her head. “I couldn’t unsee them.” Riko moved my hair aside and pointed at the red mark on my neck by my ear, where Aoi had kissed me hard.

“I… see…” Yuna whispered, tightening her hold on me. “This is worse than I thought.”

I leaned into her, unable to speak.

“This is rape!” Riko shouted, her anger breaking through.

“…No,” I cried weakly. “I begged her to do what she did. Don’t… don’t talk about her like that. It was my fault. She tried to stop and I wouldn’t let her.”

Yuna inhaled slowly and steadied herself. Then she spoke with quiet authority, “I’ll take Sumire to her room so she can calm down. Please get the curry started, Riko-chan. I already prepared the spices. All you need to do is add them to the flour when you make the roux. Will you be okay on your own?”

Riko hesitated, then nodded stiffly.

Yuna guided me gently out of the kitchen, her arm firm around my shoulders, leaving the scents of curry and the anger behind us.

Even though the pot was not simmering yet, everything else was already boiling.

Yuna sat at my side on the edge of the bed, my mattress dipping slightly under our combined weight. The room was quiet except for the distant sounds of the house, the soft clatter of Riko cooking in the kitchen, the muted hiss of steam rising from the rice cooker somewhere below.

Yuna didn’t rush me.

“What happened?” she asked gently.

I stared at my hands for a long moment before I could make myself speak.

“…The date was wonderful,” I said at last. “We went to the park like we planned, and it was more amazing than I imagined. I thought it would just be walking… just  being happy together… but when we found this really beautiful place with petals flying in the air, everything stirred all at once around us. We kissed, and it felt like… like time stopped. Like I wasn’t standing on the ground anymore.”

Yuna smiled softly and waited, letting the silence hold me instead of pressing.

“Then we watched the movie together,” I continued, letting out a small, broken laugh. “It was surprisingly good. Really romantic. I cried a lot… watching them go from fighting to loving each other. I kept thinking… this is us. Even though I don’t remember ever hating Aoi-chan… not even now…” My voice wavered. “But maybe she hates me now, I guess.”

Yuna slipped an arm around me and held me while the tears came, steady and warm.

“W-we went shopping,” I said after a while. “I bought her a ribbon. It was steel blue just like her beautiful eyes. I was so scared I was forcing my image of her onto her, but… it looked so right once I tied it in her hair… exactly as I thought. We stood in front of a mirror together, and for a moment everything felt… so right. She felt that way too, I know it... She wore it so proudly.”

“How romantic,” Yuna murmured, sighing. “And sweet.”

“When I put it on her,” I said, smiling through tears, staring at the ceiling, “she knelt like a knight right there in the aisle like she was vowing eternal loyalty… or love. I know it sounds silly… but it felt like a very special moment.”

Yuna nodded. “Like something straight from our play.”

“Yeah.”

“Our bowls of ramen were next,” I went on. “She teased me, kissed me, shared a bite of my chashu with me in a kiss. I was so wound up that I couldn’t slow down… Even later at the bookstore, I couldn’t calm myself. She bought me the two volumes of manga that were drawn based on the movie.” My gaze drifted to the unopened bag on my desk. “Because she knew owning them would make me happy.”

Yuna stood, took the books from the bag, and examined them carefully. “They look cute,” she said before sliding them neatly onto my bookshelf.

The smell of curry drifted in—warm, rich, and bright, and my stomach growled.

“What happened after that?” Yuna asked.

“Karaoke,” I whispered.

She nodded. “I thought so.”

“We sang,” I said. “Separately at first. She was amazing. And when she listened to me… something changed in her. She asked for a duet. We didn’t even finish the song.” I hugged myself, my fingers curling into the fabric of my sleeves. “I lost control. I wanted to stay there forever with her. I begged her not to pull away… and she didn’t. We made love right there. She was so happy… and I was too. She did so many things to me that felt so good…” I blushed, rubbing my eyes.

Yuna returned to the bed and sat beside me again, close enough that I could feel her presence without looking.

“…And despite how happy she was, she still left me,” I said quietly. “But I don’t regret being with her. I’m glad it happened. It was a wonderful gift. More special than the manga she bought me. She gave me everything I wanted… Maybe she got what she wanted too… I just don’t understand why she pushed me away afterward. And the last thing she said last night was…”

Silence settled between us, heavy but not suffocating.

Then, unexpectedly, Yuna leaned forward and gently pressed me against my bedding… not forcefully, but firmly enough to make me blink in surprise.

“Do you think I could hear something like that and not feel anything?” she asked, her voice low but controlled.

I stared up at her, my breath caught somewhere between confusion and awareness.

Her hair spilled forward, framing her face. Her expression was calm, but there was an intensity in her eyes.

“If I didn’t have self-control,” she said softly, “I’d have a very hard time stopping myself right now.”

Then she exhaled, the tension easing, and wrapped me in a careful, steady embrace.

“I understand,” she said. “That’s all I’m saying.”

She held me there, warm and relaxing as my heart calmed and until my breathing slowed again.

“I’ll stay with you as long as you need,” Yuna continued. “But your parents are coming home tonight. Cry now. Get it out. Then put on that sweet smile you always wear. You don’t have to be strong forever, but you have to be ready.”

I clung to her, breathing shakily, letting myself break just a little more.

The door clicked.

Riko peeked in, her jaw tight, her eyes burning with emotion she didn’t know what to do with.