Rising Shards

Chumbler and Z.O.K. looked on at the apparent other-Chumbler with her three Kanibari companions behind her.

“So, we finally meet.” Other Chumbler said.

“If this is some weird game, you should explain it and turn it into some kind of…game of chance instead! For money!” Chumbler said.

Z.O.K. looked at the Kanibari behind Other Chumbler. “Wait, are they me?”

“Oh, my minions?” Other Chumbler said. “Their names are Zorta, Orca, and Korbley.”

“So…me.” Z.O.K. said. “Why is alt-universe me three different people?”

“Well, in my universe, it was getting to be a pain to say your three initials all the time, so we went to a void node and found a special machine to split Zorta, Orca, and Korbley into three people.”

“Ah,” Z.O.K. said. “That’s…really stupid.”

“You allow your Zorta Orca Korbley to talk, Chumbler?” Other Chumbler said.

“Well…yeah?” Chumbler said.

That’s bold.” Other Chumbler said. “I’ve banned these three from talking.”

Zorta, Orca, and Korbley nodded.

“Agh, this is such a cliché,” Z.O.K. said. “Alternate universe versions of us? Why? How would that even work?”

“You both know very little about the intricacies of the universes and the void or whatever.” Other Chumbler said. “I’m not going to waste time explaining it to you.”

Z.O.K.’s eyes lit up suddenly.

“Oh, that gives me an idea though!” Z.O.K. said. “If it’s like my favorite book series, that uh—”

“The ones you keep under your bed, yes.” Chumbler said. “With titles that probably shouldn’t be said out loud.”

“Yeah, well, in those, you’d both probably have to shapeshift, yeah?” Z.O.K. said. “Chumbler, do you think your sexy form would help seduce your other self, who in turn would use their sexy form, and then—”

“Enough talk,” Other Chumbler said. “We both want the same thing, but only one of us is getting it.”

“I’d say maybe a little more talk would be good,” Chumbler said. “Just to like, make things clear. My Z.O.K. is just Z.O.K., and yours is Zorta, Orca, and Korbley. So what do I call you? Because it’s not gonna just be Chumbler, that’s me.”

Other Chumbler cackled and snorted. “You can call me…SUPER CHUMBLER.”

“Ew.” Z.O.K. said.

“I know, right?” Chumbler said.

“It does sound like something you’d come up with, though.” Z.O.K. said.

“Haha, that’s true!” Chumbler said. “I was thinking I’d be Ultra Chumbler if she really had to be Chumbler. But anyways, you’re not getting the gold capsule machine. I worked…hard? Kinda? To get here.”

“No, you won’t,” Super Chumbler said. “Girls?”

Zorta, Orca, and Korbley drew bloodsabers and pointed them at Z.O.K..

“You let me walk away with this gold capsule machine, or I have my Z, O, and K super murderize your Z.O.K.”

“Chumbler, I know you love gambling but please don’t gamble with my life.” Z.O.K. said.

“Gamble with your life, eh?” Chumbler strummed her fingers on her chin.

“I know it’s a tantalizing prospect.” Super Chumbler said. “But maybe the real gamble is…friendship?”

“Ew.” Chumbler said.

“Shut up, just decide if we’re going to kill your best friend and then you when you try and fail to grab the capsule machine. Or…not that. If you let us take it.”

Chumbler sighed. “Fine. Take it.”

“Wait, really?” Super Chumbler said. “Like, for realsies?”

“Yes, just shut up and go away already, god.” Chumbler said.

Super Chumbler cackled as she had her minions grab the gold capsule machine. Chumbler had to look away as they went back through the portal, which vanished as soon as they’d passed through it.

“Thanks for not…letting me get killed there.” Z.O.K. said. “I know that thing meant a lot to you.”

“Yeah,” Chumbler said. “Let’s go home, I’m tired of this.”

After some finagling, the two managed to find a drinking fountain in the office that doubled as a wayback bowl. With a scrape of fang on void rosin, they returned to the school.

“That kinda sucked,” Z.O.K. said.

Chumbler looked downward, having not said anything in a while.

“Oh, thank goodness,” Ms. Letoh said.

“Huh?” Z.O.K. asked.

“You’re the first two back,” Letoh said.

“Back from what? The trip?” Chumbler asked.

Letoh nodded. “It’s a good thing you escaped the raid. I’m sure they offered you a lot.”

Chumbler squinted, and shot a look to Z.O.K., who shrugged slightly. “Yeah…they sure did…?”

“Well, I’m glad you’re safe.” Ms. Letoh said. “You two should wait here for a moment, help yourselves to any leftover snacks, I have to go check with the other teachers and let them know students are starting to return.”

“OK…?” Chumbler said.  

The two hit up the tables filled with breakfast food and shared a meal of mostly candy. Chumbler was quiet again, save for some farts and exaggerated groans.

“Hey, Z.O.K.,” Chumbler said.

“What’s up?” Z.O.K. asked.

“You know, the whole gamble with your life thing…” Chumbler started.

“I know it would have been fun or thrilling or whatever—” Z.O.K. said.

“I wouldn’t have done it even if dumber Chumbler said to gamble you to get the machine.” Chumbler said. “Plus, if I bet your life and lost, who would I talk to? My other best friend Zeta Fa….Fal…something? Zeta Falsomething, I think it is?”

“Falsomething sounds right.” Z.O.K. said.

“You think I can talk to her about gamble?”

“Probably not.”

“Exactly.”

“Aw,” Z.O.K. said. “That’s…actually pretty cool of you, Chumbler.”

“Yeah,” Chumbler said. She sighed, looking at the teachers frantically running around The Building Where We Go In and Out of the Void. “Look at this mess. Well, I guess we only heard about the mess but still. Everyone else got to get raided by another school. While we just saw a big ogre, a big office monster, and duplicates of ourselves. I tell you, Z.O.K., I don’t feel like I learned anything.”

“Yeah…yeah…”

“You know what, though?” Chumbler said. “We’re gonna find that dumber Chumbler.”

“Dumbler.” Z.O.K. said. “Oh, what about Fumbler?”

“We’re gonna find Fumbler Dumbler, and we’re gonna get that gold capsule machine back!” Chumbler said.

“That’s more the Chumbler I know.”