Omni-Anime: I Stand at the Forefront of Popularity

Chapter 15: Chapter 15: Perfectly Proper

”My name is Uchiha Sasuke. There are many things I hate, and not much I like. And what I have is not merely a dream—I have an ambition. To restore my clan. And to kill a certain man.”

The temperature in the room dropped.

”Well. All three of you are quite distinctive in your own ways. Very interesting.” Kakashi’s tone didn’t change. ”I’m not sure what Hanabi told you, but—bottom line: you’ll be doing a survival exercise tomorrow morning.”

He had intended to open with something a little more ominous, but Hanabi’s pre-briefing had blunted the effect.

”Here it comes,” Sasuke murmured.

True to form: Sasuke looked directly at Kakashi when he said it, and Naruto—though he still wasn’t quite following—sat up straighter.

”As of now, only nine of the graduates will advance to Genin. The rest will be sent back to the Academy. That’s an elimination rate of over sixty percent.”

”Then what was the point of the graduation exam?!” Naruto yelped.

Sasuke stayed silent, watching Kakashi with narrowed eyes.

Kakashi had expected the dramatic announcement to land harder. Apparently only Naruto was properly rattled. The other two were composed in a way that made no sense to him.

How had it come to this?

Hanabi smiled.

”Don’t overthink it,” Kakashi said with a small sigh. ”In short—the graduation exam only identifies students with the potential to become Genin. You’re not actually Genin yet. I’ll be the one deciding whether you have what it takes.” He stood. ”Bring your gear. Training Ground at five tomorrow morning. That’s your first mission. Dismissed.”

He was already walking away, then paused.

”Oh, and—don’t eat breakfast. You’ll just throw it up.”

That was the last of his dramatic flair for the day. Then he was gone.

Team Seven’s brief first assembly came to an end.

The feed went dark.

”Looks like the camera won’t be needed today after all.” Hanabi quietly put her camera away.

The situation hadn’t called for it. Though she had accomplished her original goal—photos of Naruto and Sasuke—already.

Uchiha Sasuke rose without a word to go prepare his gear, running through scenarios in his head. How to handle a Jōnin of Kakashi’s level.

Because of Hanabi’s earlier words, the version of Kakashi living in Sasuke’s and Naruto’s minds had quietly become a shady bad guy working to lull them into complacency before sending them back to the Ninja Academy.

”I’m not losing my spot after I finally graduated—” Naruto made a silent vow to himself.

Hanabi stood as well. ”I’ll see you both tomorrow. I have a few things I need to look into.”

This was for the sake of plausibility—giving the audience a reason to believe she had done her research. Intelligence-gathering especially needed to feel earned. If you wanted viewers to accept your authority, you had to lay the groundwork properly.

Hanabi moved through every scene with the same grace—the kind, gentle Yamato nadeshiko in public, lively and playful with people she knew, her true self the bratty little devil with a darker streak underneath. That was the persona she had crafted for herself on screen.

There was no camera running now. But for a proper idol, the stage was everywhere.

She genuinely did go collect information on Kakashi.

His ANBU records were sparse. But his other identity—former student of the Fourth Hokage, holder of the title ”Konoha Technician”—was much easier to trace.

After getting a good rest, Hanabi arrived at the training ground early the next morning.

By the time Naruto and Sasuke showed up rubbing sleep from their eyes, she was already seated on a picnic blanket, kneeling with her eyes closed.

”Hanabi, you’re so early!” Naruto had been shuffling along in a haze, but the moment he spotted her, his eyes went sharp. He jogged over.

”Good morning, Naruto. Sasuke.” She greeted them both.

Then she closed her eyes again.

”What are you doing?” Sasuke asked.

Sasuke had not thought much of Hanabi initially—placing first on the written exam just meant she was good at studying. In actual combat, that counted for very little. But then he’d seen the state of the training ground that afternoon. In that moment, he had recognized something: she had clearly never shown her full strength at the Academy.

”Meditating,” Hanabi said, eyes still closed.

She was not only meditating.

Since the costume upgrade, she had kept Training Mode active at all times.

Right now, as she sat here, she was completely unable to move—she had injected chakra into the outfit and activated the gravity enhancement. Under the combined weight of gravity and restraint, she was pinned in place. But as long as she maintained this state, her strength would continue to grow slowly. So whenever she had a free moment, she ran in gravity mode.

If it doesn’t kill you, push until it almost does.

”Meditating?” Naruto tilted his head. ”But Kakashi-sensei’s going to be here soon, right?”

”He won’t be.” Hanabi said. ”Kakashi-sensei is definitely not coming anytime soon.”

”Huh? So how long do we wait?”

”A few more hours, probably.” She paused. ”Want to rest? I can offer you a lap pillow.”

”Seriously, that person is useless...”

Naruto turned down the lap pillow, but he did lie down next to her and promptly fell back asleep.

Sasuke set his bag down. ”If you knew he wasn’t coming this early, why are you here so early?”

”Because this is a mission,” Hanabi said. ”The first duty of a ninja is to complete the mission. At the Academy, we were only accountable to ourselves—being late had no consequences. But this mission was given to us by Kakashi-sensei, which means we are accountable to the person who issued it. Kakashi-sensei may arrive late. We may not.”

”...A mission.”

Sasuke sat down on the picnic blanket and closed his eyes.

[Hanabi: I predicted your prediction of my prediction]

[My wife’s lap pillow gets rejected and this guy just lies down to sleep, young man, do you know what you’re refusing]

[Let GO of Naruto. That lap pillow is MINE.]

[Didn’t she say earlier she had things to look into? I bet she ran a full background check on every Kakashi relative going back three generations]

[Honestly the dialogue here is solid—intelligence-gathering is core to what ninjas do, and completing the mission is the whole point. Hanabi just summed up both themes in two lines]

[So someone want to predict what happens next?]

[I think power system showcase is coming, plus world-building—shonen test arcs always end in a pass, so after this it’s probably Kakashi teaching the three ninja]

Hanabi noticed that label from the comments—”the three ninja”—and nearly lost her composure, because the Naruto world very much had its own Three Legendary Ninja. Kakashi teaching ”three ninja”?

Admittedly a strange image.

”Good morning.” Kakashi finally arrived, sometime near midday. ”A black cat crossed my path, so I was running a bit behind.”

Hanabi gave Naruto a nudge.

”Wh—is it time?!” Naruto lurched to his feet.

”Is the mission starting?” Sasuke rose as well.

”Hm?”

Kakashi found their reactions notably different from anything he’d expected.

Hanabi stood and folded up the picnic blanket.

”Goodness, you’re all quite different from my last batch of students.” Three of them, all clearly primed and alert—nothing like the well-behaved, slightly wide-eyed kids he’d processed in previous years.

”Intelligence-gathering is the most basic of basics,” Hanabi said. She loosened her obi slightly as she spoke, adjusting the kimono. She had already switched Training Mode off and returned to her normal state.

”Huh? Ah—what—”

Naruto’s sleepiness evaporated completely.

Hanabi had already activated a close-up camera card.

Slowly, she gathered the hem of her kimono and began drawing it upward.

The camera on screen followed: a low shot on her feet, then tracking upward with the rising hem.

As the fabric climbed, what had been concealed beneath came into view—white thigh-highs, revealed inch by deliberate inch.

[WAIT—]

[Everything is proper and correct]

[An extremely intentional close-up shot]

[Sustenance. Beautiful sustenance.]

[ARE THOSE ACTUALLY WHITE THIGH-HIGHS]

[The prophet was right. Sacrifice made]

[WHITE THIGH-HIGHS. WHITE THIGH-HIGHS. WHITE THIGH-HIGHS.]

[White thigh-highs, I could eat three bowls of rice]

[It is written, in the Arknights archives.]

[These white thigh-highs—I could eat three bowls—Yu Dafu]

[Time to eat~]

[Shaved ice~ shaved ice~]

[The sandals don’t even cover the feet, ah...]

[A man has died] ×n

The hemline rose steadily. What had been floor-length became a short-form kimono skirt—a traditional silhouette transformed into something thoroughly modern. Hanabi moved with unhurried precision, and the comment count climbed at a pace that suggested structural damage to the platform.

After retying her obi, she rolled her shoulders and stretched.

[Nice, there’s a SECOND form]

[THOSE ARE GARTERS, NOT FULL-LENGTH]

[prprprpr]

The comments had already detonated.

Heeled sandals. White garter-top thigh-highs. This audience had zero remaining resistance.

Under the barrage of that combined reveal, Hanabi’s popularity points surged.

Hanabi, for her part, smiled quietly and put on her mask.

The main event hadn’t even started yet.