Limitless Evolution As a Snake

(NO NTR)Matthew Vane lived a life so aggressively safe, so entirely devoid of flavour, risk, or ambition, that when his heart gave out at 4:45 PM on a Tuesday, the universe felt personally insulted. He was reincarnated into a brutal, dystopian underworld as a baby crimson snake, strapped to an [Indulgence System]. It was meant to be a lust system with a beautiful goddess, but shit hit the fan now; his system is a drunk Australian man.Because Matt took zero risks as a human, his System demands total, unadulterated self-gratification to function. Want to level up? Indulge your vices. Want to get stronger? Do exactly what you want, when you want, and stop caring about anyone else. Matt isn't out to save the kingdom, and he's definitely not trying to play the villain. He just wants to live for himself, max out his own comfort, and avoid any actual hard work.The problem? Matt has absolutely no idea how to build a proper monster.While other beasts evolve world-ending acid breath or diamond-hard fangs, Matt is out here spending his precious Indulgence Points on a completely unoptimized, chaotic build designed purely for his own convenience and vanity and whats worse is Matt only gets three skill slots to climb from F-Rank to SSS. The catch? The moment he wants a cool new snake superpower, one of his current stupid abilities has to be permanently deleted forever.We’re talking premium skills like:* [Slither Quickly (Rank F)]: Optimised entirely for running away from conflict at max speed.* [Look Slightly Menacing (Rank E)]: Gives his tiny face just enough of a resting-bitch-glance that low-level adventurers leave him the fuck alone.* [Seductive Hiss (Rank B)]: Grants a +100% Charm Aura. Because if you can't bite a high-elf ranger, you might as well flirt your way out of becoming a coin purse.He is a neutral wildcard who is entirely too lazy to be a hero, too selfish to be a villain, and somehow accidentally terrifying the entire underworld ecosystem, mostly because nobody can predict what a baby danger noodle with hypnotic bedroom eyes and a prehensile tail optimised for holding snacks will do next.