Immortal Paladin

We finally set off.

I stood near the prow of the lead Soaring Dragon, the wind brushing past my robes and the hum of formations vibrating beneath my feet. Beneath us, the clouds parted like silk, revealing glimpses of the earth far below: rivers like silver threads, mountain peaks like broken teeth.

“Sir Wei,” Xue Xin called, walking with a measured gait across the polished deck. Her expression was calm as ever, but I noticed the pride in her voice. “At this pace, we’ll reach the Promised Dunes in less than two months. Possibly six weeks, depending on the wind.”

I turned my head toward her, raising an eyebrow. “That’s fast. I thought it would take longer, since we are travelling to an entirely different country.” 

“Faster than what I heard about your previous journey from Riverfall to the Imperial Capital,” she said, her voice slightly curious, as if prodding for confirmation.

“Mm. Took longer than that,” I admitted. “And that was on the Floating Dragon. According to Ren Xun, we would’ve made good time if we hadn’t sightseen and stopped at every turn. Man, I missed that guy. While he likes pretending he was a rascal, he is truly just a tender soul if it comes to it... Do you know? Back in Ironmoor, there was this thing... ah... Apologies. I got carried away.”

”No need to apologize,” She gave a rare smile. “These are the upgraded models. The Soaring Dragons run on quintessence-grade formation cores now. A gift from the Empire’s Arcane Engineering Pavilion. And of course…”

She gestured toward the rear of the fleet, where bulbous, gourd-shaped vessels trailed in formation. Their hulls glowed faintly with runes that flickered like fireflies in the fading light.

“…the Formation Gourd boats,” she continued. “They carry a modified leyline compression array that drastically reduces the Soaring Dragons’ cooldown time between warp-jumps. Without them, each leap would require two days of rest. With them? Two hours.”

“Convenient,” I said, though I kept my arms folded. I couldn’t help but feel a bit suspicious. All this technology, all this support… too many good things handed over too easily by an Empire that didn’t trust me. I knew about Nongmin, but the rest of the Empire? Not so much. “It seems the Emperor really likes me.”

Still, I wasn’t going to complain about arriving faster. The Promised Dunes weren’t just a stop on a map. Somewhere in that endless sea of sand was Lu Gao. And the girls… Alice and Joan… They were counting on me to get there.

“Have you assigned the watch schedule?” I asked.

“I have. Each boat has two internal cultivators, one spell weaver, and a formation specialist. Yours, of course, includes me, Young Master Jin Yi, and General Bai. And then there are your retainers, Jin Wen and Hei Yuan.”

I nodded, taking in her words. “General Bai, huh? Wasn’t expecting someone of prestigious rank to be tagging along.”

Xue Xin inclined her head slightly. “General Bai volunteered. The Bai Clan has always prided themselves on honor. He views your mission as a matter of national interest. And…” she hesitated just a beat, “he wanted to meet you.”

“Let me guess,” I said, tapping the rail. “To see if I’m a threat?”

Her lips pressed into a line. Not denying it.

“Fair enough,” I muttered. “And Jin Yi?”

Xue Xin’s gaze drifted toward the front cabin. “Young Master Jin Yi was assigned by the Ministry of Rites and Harmony. His presence is… ceremonial. The Empire wishes to express diplomatic goodwill with the Promised Dunes if necessary.”

I snorted. “He’s a glorified tour guide, then.”

She didn’t disagree. “He’s harmless. Talented in the social arts, if not martial.”

I leaned back slightly, letting the wind catch my hair. The sky above was fading from pale blue into streaks of lavender and gold. It wasn’t quite sunset yet, but we were nearing that magic hour when the whole world seemed softer.

“You trust him?” I asked.

She looked at me, eyes steady. “I trust few people, Sir Wei. But I don’t believe Jin Yi is your enemy.”

That was about the highest praise one could hope for from Xue Xin. I gave a noncommittal grunt and turned my gaze back to the clouds. A part of me wanted to relax. The wind was clean up here, the kind you couldn’t find anywhere near a city. Even the hum of the formation engines or whatever had a soothing rhythm, like the world was exhaling.

But the other part of me kept tapping me on the shoulder, showing my impatience.

“Sir Da Wei,” came a new voice, high and polite.

I turned to see Jin Yi walking toward us with a hesitant sort of energy. He was young, probably not even thirty by Earth standards, though with cultivators it was always hard to tell. Slim frame, neatly trimmed hair, and a long robe in blue and white, typical ceremonial wear for his position.

He bowed lightly, just enough to be respectful without looking like he was groveling. “Forgive the intrusion. I wished to formally introduce myself, as we hadn’t yet spoken in person.”

“Da Wei,” I said simply. “No need for formality.”

“I appreciate your candor,” Jin Yi said, with a practiced smile. “Though my position requires certain formalities, I prefer a more… harmonious rapport.”

Xue Xin remained silent beside me, watching him like a cat eyeing a new bird in the garden.

“I’ve reviewed the itinerary,” he went on, producing a thin jade slip from his sleeve. “Provided all warp-jumps are successful and we encounter no spatial turbulence, we should arrive at the northern edge of the Promised Dunes in forty-three days. I’ve arranged for a pre-landing banquet to be prepared three days prior, during our descent phase.”

“A banquet?” I repeated, raising an eyebrow. “In the middle of a sandstorm continent?”

“It is tradition,” he replied, as if that explained everything. “A ritual meal to ease the spirit before confronting the unknown.”

I gave a small laugh. “If that’s what keeps the Ministry happy, go for it. Just don’t expect me to toast with gold wine under a collapsing leyline. Or I don’t know, angry sand beasts?”

Jin Yi nodded, unoffended. “Understood. I’ll ensure the banquet doesn’t impede our operational readiness.”

He gave another slight bow and stepped away, his light footfalls quickly lost in the wind.

When he was gone, I glanced at Xue Xin. “I take it he wasn’t briefed on the fact we might be walking into a tomb full of sand beasts and forgotten blood rites. I don’t want to expect a fight, but knowing my luck...”

She gave a faint shrug. “He knows the official version.”

“Right,” I murmured. “The version where I’m going to find missing Outsiders in an uncharted region for goodwill and mutual prosperity.”

And then there was Lu Gao.

The sky darkened. One of the Formation Gourd boats flared briefly, a pulse of violet energy cascading through the clouds. We began to slow, warp-jump preparations underway.

“Should I expect any trouble on board?” I asked her quietly.

“Doubtful. The crews were handpicked by the Phoenix Guard and thoroughly screened. But…” she hesitated, “…there may still be eyes.”

“Spies?”

“Observers,” she corrected. “From more than one Imperial House. They wouldn’t dare act openly. But you know how politics works.”

“No, I don’t, but I am in your safe hands, so that should count for something, right?”

“I am flattered, you think that, Sir Wei.”

I used Voice Chat on Alice.

“Huh? That’s unexpected.”

Nothing. No chime, no signal, just the cold silence of the sky.

I tried Voice Chat on Lu Gao.

“What is the problem, Sir Wei?” asked Xue Xin.

Still nothing. Not even a flicker.

I frowned and tried Joan next.

“Don’t mind me, Miss Xue,” I kept my thoughts to my own. “I am merely thinking to myself.”

Silence. There was utter silence in my Voice Chat. My fingers twitched against the railing. No signal meant either they were out of range… or something was wrong. And I didn’t like either possibility.

“Xue Xin,” I said, turning to her. “Is there any way to make this thing faster?”

She gave me a side glance. “None.”

“Seriously?”

“These are the fastest vessels we have that are warp-stable,” she replied, tone level. “We’re already cutting the standard journey time by half. Unless you’d like to try jumping through unstable leyline turbulence without a calibrated array…”

“I’ll pass,” I muttered. “And honestly, I barely understand half of what you say.”

She studied me for a second, then added, “Be patient, Sir Wei. Worrying will not help them. And haste without purpose invites disaster.”

That didn’t make me feel better.

I exhaled slowly, the hum of the formation engines vibrating underfoot. The horizon remained unchanged, filled with endless sky and endless clouds.

“Jin Wen, Hei Yuan!” I called, waving them over.

The two appeared a moment later from below deck, not wearing the dark garb of the Shadow Clan this time, but neutral traveling robes. Neither of them came on this expedition as emissaries or scouts. No, this time they followed me under a simpler title: retainer.

Jin Wen adjusted his outer robe as he stepped beside me, brushing back some windblown strands of his hair. “You called, Master Wei?”

“Yeah. Jin Wen,” I said, crossing my arms. “You know anything about the Promised Dunes?”

He nodded. “A fair bit. I was born in the Great Desert, actually. Not in the Dunes proper, but close enough. My early years were spent among a trade caravan. And just to get this out in advance, no, I am not related to the young fellow called Jin Yi.”

“Really?” I blinked. “How’d you end up with the Shadow Clan?”

He offered a nostalgic smile. “Bandits struck the caravan when I was twelve. Most of us scattered. I wandered for days and was eventually found by Patriarch Hei Ben. He took me in.”

“Lucky you,” I murmured.

“Very,” he agreed.

I turned my attention to Hei Yuan, who stood at ease, hands folded behind his back. “Speaking of Patriarchs… has your clan decided on a new Patriarch yet?”

Hei Yuan snorted. “They want me to take it.”

I raised a brow. “And you said?”

“I told them I’m too old to become anyone’s Patriarch. My back hurts just thinking about Clan Council meetings.”

“Nah, I think you are the right age,” I chuckled. “But yeah, it’s an acceptable reason not to agree. I reckon, you’d probably rather fight three blood demons naked than argue with Hei Ximei about land rights.”

He gave a sage nod. “Naked and blindfolded.”

The sky darkened slightly as we approached another warp-jump node. I watched the Formation Gourd boats pulse with pale blue light. That was the cue for a short break, two hours of quiet while the arrays cooled.

The wind died down just enough for voices to carry without shouting.

I sighed. “I’m bored.”

Xue Xin glanced at me. “Boredom is a rare luxury in our line of work. You should savor it.”

“No, seriously.” I turned toward her with a half-grimace. “You got anything in mind to pass the time? Something fun?”

She was silent for a breath longer than necessary.

Then, with a completely straight face, she said, “I could warm your bed.”

Hei Yuan coughed behind me. Jin Wen stared at the sky like he was trying to ascend through awkwardness alone.

I blinked. “I… uh… come again?”

Xue Xin tilted her head slightly, her tone entirely matter-of-fact. “It’s a time-honored practice among martial companions. It builds trust and rapport. If you prefer, I can ask one of my sisters instead.”

I stared. “You’re talking about that like you’re offering me extra blankets.”

She blinked. “Would you prefer extra blankets?”

“No! I mean…” I ran a hand down my face. “You know what? Never mind.”

There was an uncomfortable silence before Hei Yuan broke it with a muttered, “At least offer him tea first, Captain…”

Xue Xin raised an eyebrow. “I did. Two nights ago. He said no.”

I turned to the railing, pretending to admire the scenery, my face slightly hot. Why was I feeling nervous about this stuff when I could go gung-ho at it with Xin Yune all night, non-stop? This damn world… sometimes I missed the simplicity of Earth. Pizza and bad movies and awkward first dates where nobody offered to ‘build rapport’ in the most literal way possible.

Where did my inner David_69 go? I guess boredom really was a luxury out here... if I could feel like this in most random of moments. A luxury that was rapidly running out. Because if I couldn’t contact Alice, Joan, or Lu Gao soon… we weren’t flying toward a reunion.

“So, do you want me to warm your bed?” suggested Xue Xin a second time. “Maybe call a few of my sisters to help on the task?”

“No thanks.”

It wasn’t just Xue Xin.

Now that I was really paying attention, it was all of them.

Every time I walked across the deck, one of the Imperial Phoenix Guard would give me a lingering look, smile too long, or pretend to bump into me and apologize with her hand way too low on my arm. That kind of look… the kind people used when they were sizing up a roast duck, not a person.

It was subtle, mostly. Professional, even. But I wasn’t blind.

I found myself staring at the silver crest stitched into the shoulder of one of the guards standing post near the helm, and I muttered under my breath, “…what the hell is going on?”

Later that evening, when the stars shimmered faintly against the inverted dome of the world and the hum of the formation engines softened to a low thrum, I cornered Xue Xin by the side rail. The clouds passed lazily below, and the desert wind was crisp and dry.

“Hey,” I said, arms folded. “Be honest with me. What’s going on with your girls?”

She blinked at me with that calm, detached elegance that she always wore like armor. “What do you mean, Sir Wei?”

“You know what I mean. The Phoenix Guard. They keep flirting with me.” I jabbed a thumb toward the main deck, where three of her subordinates were laughing at something and throwing me glances that were a little too sharp, a little too practiced. “They weren’t exactly subtle about it.”

A hint of amusement ghosted across her lips. “Ah. That.”

“That?” I raised an eyebrow.

She stepped beside me, placing both hands on the rail. Her voice was smooth, matter-of-fact. “The Imperial Phoenix Guard is an all-women unit. Most of us joined for two reasons: loyalty to the Empire and devotion to His Majesty.”

“Devotion to…” I frowned. “So, like a cult?”

“No,” she said immediately. “We are warriors, trained from youth to fight and die for the Emperor’s cause. We are not mindless. But loyalty breeds its own… traditions. The late Divine Physician contributed greatly to the realization of our organization. In fact, most of my sisters are capable healers too on top of being warriors.”

I gave her a sideways look. “Uh-huh. Traditions that involve trying to get into my pants?”

She didn’t flinch. “One function of the Phoenix Guard is as a reserve pool for His Majesty’s future consorts.”

I nearly choked. “I’m sorry. What now?” Okay, I knew this little factoid already from Xin Yune, but hearing it for real and confirmed in my face had a different impact.

She tilted her head slightly, as if describing the weather. “We are trained not only in war, but in etiquette, courtly manners, and… companionship. It is considered a great honor to be chosen by His Majesty. However, His Majesty has not touched a single member of the Phoenix Guard.”

“That’s…” I hesitated. “Wait, is this that old story? The one related to... I don’t know. The one where Nongmin was a thousand-year-old virgin until a century ago?”

Xue Xin nodded solemnly. “Yes. It caused concern among the inner court. Pressure from the Seven Houses and the old nobility was immense. The Phoenix Guard trained and waited… and waited. Some of the oldest members passed without ever being called.”

“Then…” I ran a hand down my face, slowly connecting the dots. “He gives you all to me? What, like some sort of reverse imperial dowry?”

Her eyes flicked to mine. “Not given. Assigned. To ensure your protection and cooperation as an esteemed ally of the Empire. Rather than ally, I believe it is more apt to call you part royalty... given your special functions, Sir Wei.”

I gave a dry laugh, but it didn’t feel like amusement. “Sure. And the part where you suggested warming my bed?”

She shrugged. “I serve the Empire. If that is what keeps you content and on our side, it would not be dishonorable.”

I stared at her. “Are you seriously telling me Nongmin just upgraded his honeypot strategy by sending me a flying harem of elite warrior women?”

She didn’t answer.

Which said enough.

I buried my face in my hands. “That’s so cruel… bro, I slept with your mom!”

Xue Xin raised an eyebrow at that.

“Never mind,” I muttered quickly. ”Forget what I said.”

She continued without missing a beat, “Only those acknowledged by the Emperor may marry a member of the Imperial Phoenix Guard. That acknowledgment, we believe, has been extended to you.”

“Which means…?”

“Which means some of the girls see throwing themselves at you as a glorious act. A way to serve the Empire in both body and soul.”

I stared at her blankly. “Yeah. I… don’t get it.”

She gave a faint smile, the first real expression I’d seen on her in hours. “You’re not meant to. But we do.”

I turned, leaning my elbows on the rail and staring down at the clouds as they drifted like lazy ghosts below us.

Of course, Nongmin would do this. It was exactly the kind of convoluted, dramatic, emotionally charged move he’d pull: offer me resources, ships, elite warriors… and then lace it all with this kind of tangled political intimacy.

I had too much on my mind already. The girls weren’t responding to Voice Chat. Alice, Joan, Lu Gao… wherever they were, I couldn’t reach them. And now I had to worry about seductive death-commandos offering themselves up because they thought it would help the Empire?

What was I even doing here?