Hogwarts: I Am Such a Model Wizard

Chapter 903: Snape’s Little Thoughts

Role-playing between couples isn’t embarrassing—so long as no one else finds out.

But if someone familiar catches you, it’s a whole different story—especially if they take a photo.

Bill knew that all too well.

Was it wrong to dress up as a Christmas present and travel all the way to see his fiancée?

No. It was romantic, a way to add some spice and deepen their relationship.

Was it wrong to kiss his fiancée in the street?

Still no. This was France—public displays of affection were as normal here as spotting a balding middle-aged man in the UK.

So why, then, did he so desperately want to be in Azkaban?

Bill sat in the potions shop, caught in a daze, half-asleep and half-awake.

Next to him, Kyle and Kanna were examining a photo, commenting critically.

“Look at that red and gold. A Christmas gift straight from Gryffindor. Now that’s some dedication.”

“The ribbon’s cute too. Very playful.” Kanna covered her mouth, trying hard not to laugh.

She couldnʼt laugh. The person in question was right there—it would be too rude.

But it was so funny.

Kanna’s shoulders trembled as she struggled to hold it in.

“Good thing I had the foresight to bring my camera. Managed to capture this glorious moment. Mrs. Weasley’s going to love it.”

Bill hung his head even lower.

He stared at the wand in his hand, torn between casting the Killing Curse on himself—or on Kyle.

Maybe Kyle first. Destroy the photo, then turn the wand on himself, and claim Voldemort attacked France.

At least that way, his reputation might be salvaged.

No matter how progressive Bill thought he was, he didn’t want Mrs. Weasley seeing a photo of him dressed up like a Christmas present.

He’d be the family joke... for the next fifty years. Maybe longer.

He could already picture Fred and George plastering the photo in their shop window, turning it into a promotional poster, printing it on merchandise—shipping it worldwide.

Better to just grit his teeth and bury it all here and now.

Let it all burn. Iʼm done.

Bill tightened his grip on his wand.

“Enough!” Fleur stood up, snatched the photo away in a flash, tore it to pieces in seconds, and tossed them into the fireplace.

As the picture crumbled to ash, the light finally returned to Bill’s eyes.

Kyle didn’t stop her. He waited until the last scrap was gone, then leisurely pulled out a thick stack of identical photos and asked,

“Want more?”

Of course he had backups—he’d mastered the Doubling Charm back in first year.

Fleur rolled her eyes in exasperation.

“You thought I was Bill yesterday, didn’t you?” Kyle asked.

“Yeah,” Fleur admitted without hesitation.

Bill had written that he’d be arriving for Christmas, so when Kyle knocked, she instinctively thought it was him arriving early and eagerly rushed to open the door.

Only to find out it was Kyle, looking for Kanna.

She had just finished watching the two of them act lovey-dovey—and barely recovered—and now this, on Christmas of all days?

It was too much. Especially when she knew Bill was coming, but hadn’t arrived yet.

“Tch... So petty. You kept me up all night,” Kyle muttered, waving the photo in his hand. “Apologize to me now, and maybe I’ll consider letting you off the hook.”

“Hah?” Fleur gave a crooked smirk.

Would she apologize?

Of course not. She stood up and planted another kiss on Bill’s head.

Fleur couldn’t care less if Kyle sent the photo to the Weasleys. In fact, she hoped he would. That way, once Bill became a social outcast in England, he could just stay in France for good.

“...” Kyle grumbled again and chucked the photo into the fireplace.

“Fine, you win.”

He was never actually going to send it to Mrs. Weasley—let alone let Fred and George see it. Bill had only come to visit his fiancée, and while he’d gone a bit overboard, it wasn’t criminal.

Still...

Kyle glanced at Kanna, half-calculating something in the back of his mind.

Unfortunately, Kanna wasn’t looking at him. Her eyes were locked on a piece of parchment on the table.

Kyle had picked it up along with the photo earlier—and it was one of the reasons he’d come.

“I’ve never seen this potion recipe before, and...” Kanna frowned as she read, “Boomslang skin, unicorn blood... A wizard couldn’t possibly survive a mix of those two. You didn’t make this up, did you?”

“This came from Director Sykes of St. Mungo’s,” Kyle replied.

Kanna blinked, surprised. “Then I must not know enough yet.”

“Wait—do you trust her that much?” Kyle looked incredulous.

Just moments ago she’d been totally serious, but the second she heard Sykes’s name, she dropped her opinion without hesitation. That was way too quick.

“Of course. Director Sykes is a living legend in the potions world. Honestly, I think she’s greater than Headmaster Dumbledore.”

“Fair enough,” Kyle said.

He had to admit—fans always went soft for their idols. Wizards were no exception.

“Actually, you weren’t wrong. This potion is for dragons.”

“Dragons?”

“Yeah.” Kyle nodded. “I’m raising five of them in the Forbidden Forest. Director Sykes came by yesterday and gave me this.”

“Wait, what did you just say?”

Kyle had barely finished before Bill sat bolt upright.

He no longer cared about embarrassment. He raised his head and stared straight at Kyle. “What did you say you were doing in the Forbidden Forest?”

“Raising dragons. What’s the big deal?”

“Listen to yourself! You can exaggerate a bit to impress a girl, sure—but this is ridiculous. Five dragons? Even Charlie never took care of five dragons at once at the reserve!”

“It’s not something I can explain in a few words. When you get the chance, come to Hogwarts and see for yourself,” Kyle said.

“Oh, and by the way...” He turned to Kanna. “Dumbledore’s no longer the Headmaster—Professor McGonagall is. Also, after Christmas, I’ll be the Ancient Runes professor.”

“What?”

“What did you just say?”

Both witches turned to him almost simultaneously—only Bill was too stunned to react.

“What, none of you knew?” Kyle asked, puzzled, directing his gaze toward Fleur. “Madam Maxime attended the inauguration of the new headmistress. Didn’t she tell you?”

“No,” Fleur shook her head. “We haven’t been in touch much lately, actually.”

Then something seemed to occur to her. She turned and glared at Bill. “And you? How could you not mention something this big in your letter?”

“I...” Bill looked a little aggrieved.

Fleur was French—why would she care who the new headmistress at Hogwarts was?

And besides, why would they need to bring up Dumbledore in their correspondence?

Still, seeing the expression in Fleur’s eyes, Bill decided to keep those thoughts to himself.

He was also a little thrown. He had known that Hogwarts had a new headmistress, but what was this about Kyle becoming the Ancient Runes professor?

No one had told him.

And then there were the five dragons.

He’d been thinking it over—Kyle wasn’t the type to brag, and considering how close he was with Kanna, there was no need for some ridiculous lie just to show off.

Which meant... it was probably true.

But the more likely it seemed, the harder it was to believe.

Wizards raising dragons? Even Gringotts only dared to keep them in secret.

Maybe Kyle was hiding them too? If he got caught, that would be an express ticket to Azkaban.

Bill got up nervously and pulled the shop’s curtains shut.

“No need to get so worked up,” Kyle said, waving a hand as he gave a general rundown of what had happened.

The main focus was how Professor McGonagall came to replace Dumbledore.

As for the Time-Turner and everything it entailed, there was far too much to explain, and Fleur wasn’t someone who needed to know all the details. Kyle simply pinned it all on Newt and Dumbledore, saying it was thanks to their help that he’d gotten the license to legally raise dragons.

It wasn’t that he didn’t trust Fleur—given her relationship with Bill, she was practically family.

But this involved some of Dumbledore’s secrets, and it just wasn’t convenient to share too much.

Even so, it was already more than enough to surprise them.

Kanna sat there, mouth open in amazement, like she was listening to a fairy tale—utterly adorable.

And Fleur... Kyle didn’t know if it was just his imagination, but she seemed to be regressing to some kind of ancestral state.

It’s just a few fire dragons. Is that really so shocking?

Talk about making a fuss over nothing.

“I can’t believe I missed so much,” Kanna said, a little wistful.

“You...” Kyle glanced at her, as if he wanted to say something.

“Never mind,” Kanna said suddenly, changing the subject. “Professor McGonagall’s a great choice for headmistress.”

“I haven’t congratulated you yet, by the way. After Christmas, you’ll probably be the youngest professor at Hogwarts, won’t you?”

“Mm... I think so,” Kyle nodded.

“Tch.” Fleur rolled her eyes but didn’t say anything. Instead, she wrapped her arms around Bill again and gave him another dramatic kiss.

“Hey,” Bill protested. “There was no feeling in that kiss at all. I might as well have been an apple.”

“A sweet apple,” Fleur replied with a grin, clearly in a much better mood.

Kyle smacked his lips. Suddenly, he felt... full.

So this was how Fleur felt before?

Turns out, she had every right to be annoyed.

But the weird thing was, even with Kanna sitting right next to him, he was the one getting force-fed all the lovey-dovey stuff.

He wanted to be an apple too.

“Kanna...” Kyle turned toward her.

“Do you have any unicorn blood?”

“What?”

“Unicorn blood,” Kanna repeated. “These are the two rarest ingredients in the recipe. I’ve got Boomslang skin, but I almost never use unicorn blood. You’ve probably got some, right?”

“Oh, yeah.” Kyle pulled out a bottle. Inside was a silvery liquid, gleaming like molten silver Sickles.

As for how Kyle had unicorn blood... it came from Hagrid.

He’d casually mentioned to Hagrid that if he ever came across an injured unicorn, he should collect a little blood.

Kyle really hadn’t expected anything to come of it. Unicorns were magical creatures with a very rare trait: no other creature would willingly attack them—not even the most aggressive Horntails.

And unicorns themselves weren’t fragile, either. Under normal circumstances, they were almost never injured.

Kyle had planned to buy some from Diagon Alley instead.

Though unicorn blood carried a strange immortality curse, once it left the body, the curse would dissipate within seconds. So it wasn’t considered a banned substance and was used in a number of potions.

For example, Felix Felicis—one of the most famous potions—listed unicorn blood as an essential ingredient.

Of course, it was incredibly expensive—about ten times the price of dragon blood—and very hard to come by.

Kyle never expected Hagrid to show up with a full bottle that very night. And it wasn’t a small amount, either.

According to Hagrid, while unicorns rarely fought each other, there was one exception—around Christmastime, when they searched for mates.

To show off their strength, they’d chase away rivals.

Hagrid had happened to find one with a pierced front leg, bleeding heavily.

And he said there might be more in the coming days. If Kyle needed more, he could get it.

”How did you know I had unicorn blood?” Kyle asked, curious.

”Here.” Kanna pointed to a subtle mark on the parchment.

”I donʼt just know you have unicorn blood—I also know you’ve brewed this potion before.” She picked up the parchment and gave it a sniff. ”Your cauldron exploded, didn’t it?”

”You knew that?” Kyle looked genuinely surprised.

His cauldron had exploded—twice, in fact. Both times, the potion had boiled over the moment he added the unicorn blood, splattering everywhere.

”Boomslang skin and unicorn blood react badly together. Itʼs like casting a Water-Making Charm and a Blasting Curse at the same time. Of course your cauldron blew up if you added them directly.”

Kanna explained, ”You should’ve mixed the unicorn blood with powdered ginger root first to act as a buffer.”

”But... Director Sykes didn’t mention that.”

”Isn’t it common knowledge?” Kanna replied matter-of-factly.

Kyle opened his mouth but didn’t say anything.

He’d always thought he did well in Potions at school—he and Kanna had been on par. How had the gap grown so wide in such a short time after graduating?

”Leave it to me.” Kanna casually gathered up the parchment.

”And that too,” she added, pointing at the unicorn blood in Kyle’s hand. ”It’s wasted on you.”

”Alright then.” Kyle obediently handed over the bottle.

”Ha!” Fleur gave a gleeful little laugh beside them.

It was the first time she’d seen Kyle taken down a peg.

So what if he’d won the Triwizard Tournament? His cauldron still exploded when brewing potions.

Her potions had never exploded.

Kyle heard the sarcasm, of course, but didn’t react.

Beauxbatons’ Potions curriculum was like Hogwarts’ Care of Magical Creatures—combine all the students across the years and you’d barely have a hundred.

She didn’t know a thing about Potions.

”Right, I’ve got something for you too,” Kanna suddenly said.

She walked over to a nearby shelf, pulled out a pouch, and placed it on the table.

Kyle opened it to find it full of Galleons—probably more than a hundred.

”I don’t need money,” Kyle said, handing the pouch back to her. ”I opened a shop in Diagon Alley. Business is a bit slow, but I still make a decent income.”

”No customers, but a decent income?” Fleur drawled. ”When you say ‘decent,’ do you mean earning one Galleon?”

Kyle ignored her and pushed the pouch back toward Kanna. ”Seriously, keep it. I really don’t need it.”

”But it’s yours,” Kanna said. ”Uncle Severus sent it over a while back—he said it was compensation.”

”I don’t know why he sent your compensation to me, or why he told me not to mention it to you. But since you’re here, take it.”

Kyle looked at Kanna, then down at the pouch of Galleons.

Finally, it clicked.

Snape had come to his shop once because of something related to Malfoy, and he’d broken an ebony display stand.

They’d agreed on 150 Galleons in compensation.

Later, Snape insisted he’d already paid, but Kyle never received anything—neither did Dobby.

It had become a mystery.

So this was where the money had gone.

Kyle remembered now—he’d once said that his money was Kanna’s money. It was just meant to provoke Snape a little, but apparently the man had taken it to heart... and followed through by giving the compensation to her.

Thinking of that, Kyle picked up the pouch.

”In that case, I’ll gladly accept it.”

”This pouch—is it yours? Or did Professor Snape send it with the gold?” he asked.

”It’s Uncle’s,” Kanna said, narrowing her eyes at him. ”You’re not up to something, are you?”

”No, of course not! Why would I be?” Kyle denied immediately. ”Iʼm Professor Snape’s colleague now. Why would I scheme against him? You’re overthinking this!”

”You’d better not be,” Kanna sighed.

She hadn’t even mentioned Snape’s name just now, and Kyle had already confessed everything without being asked.

She was starting to regret handing him the pouch.

”Forget it.” Kanna shook her head. She was in France anyway—whatever those two did was none of her concern.

The group chatted a while longer. Fleur was particularly curious how Kyle had become a Hogwarts professor at such a young age.

Beauxbatons had never had a professor that young.

Kyle didn’t know what else to say, so he simply credited it to Dumbledore and the current headmistress.

As they talked, Kanna kept sneaking glances at the parchment on the table.

The recipe came from Sykes, and now that she had the key ingredients, she couldn’t wait to try it out.

The urge only grew stronger. Even with Kyle—the person she’d dreamed about day and night—right beside her, she couldn’t settle down.

”Sorry, you two keep chatting.”

A few minutes later, Kanna couldn’t resist anymore. She stood up, grabbed the parchment and the unicorn blood, and headed straight for the basement.

”Wait, I’ll come too—”

Kyle started to follow, but Kanna either didn’t hear him or ignored him entirely. She walked into the basement and shut the door firmly behind her.

The heavy wooden door nearly slammed into Kyle’s face.

”Hey...” came the mocking voice of the half-Veela behind him.

”Don’t you have anything better to do?” Kyle grumbled. ”Go eat your apple.”

”Mind your own business!” Fleur shot back with a defiant glare.