Gun of Ashes

Chapter 700: Chapter 179 Farewell_3

”Say something, Mrs. Van Rudd, be it scolding or reprimanding, just say something.”

Lorenzo’s emotions were no longer fluctuating. He clenched his hand tightly, gripping the still-burning cigarette butt, as a faint pain flashed by.

”I’m sorry, sorry...”

”In the end, I’m still human. No matter what kind of power I have, I still can’t change the essence of my heart. I’m a fragile human. I try my best to isolate myself from emotions because they make me vulnerable. But just like you said, living together for so long, even a dog would have some feelings.”

Lorenzo mumbled in broken phrases, like a nagging old woman.

This feeling was truly terrible. He could endure the scorching fire and the slashing of a sharp sword, but the pain from within was unbearable.

”Did you kill him?”

”Who?”

”The culprit.”

Lorenzo recalled the image of Moriarty in his mind, the man driven mad even as death approached in that [Gap].

”Yes, I killed him,” Lorenzo answered, ”but unfortunately, I couldn’t make him feel more pain... But for someone like him, tormenting him would be rather dull.”

”So have you been avoiding me this past month?”

”Sort of... one of the many reasons.”

Mrs. Van Rudd didn’t look at Lorenzo; her eyes were fixed straight ahead, though there seemed to be nothing there.

”I’m going to retire. Honestly, I originally wanted to leave the house to you and Hig.”

”Yeah.”

They seemed truly unsure of what to say, speaking intermittently and sparsely.

Lorenzo could barely stand the suffocating tension. He took a deep breath, pulled out a file envelope from his coat, and handed it to Mrs. Van Rudd.

”What’s this?”

”It’s... a parting gift from me, I guess.”

Lorenzo pondered how to put it. He was usually silver-tongued, but now his words felt dry.

”Actually, I started preparing this when you first mentioned retirement to me. I just didn’t expect to give it to you in this manner. I thought it would be more cheerful, like hanging a banner or something.”

”You know I’m in a dangerous line of work, but the rewards are also considerable. With the money I’ve saved up in some odd ways during my previous work... the orphanage I’ve been sponsoring has shut down.”

Lorenzo tried to speak as cheerfully as possible.

”Sigh, the property prices in this damned Old Dunling are truly expensive. The nuns couldn’t keep it running any longer. Soon, the church there will be demolished, giving way to a factory... For someone like me, money has no real meaning, so I took out my savings and everything to help them move the orphanage to a small town.

So technically, I’m still a director, with a few nuns and a dozen children under my care.”

Lorenzo found himself marveling at how this situation didn’t seem to connect with him at all.

”People need something to rely on to survive. As for what I rely on, it’s better not to mention it here; they’re all bad things anyhow. But you’re different, Mrs. Van Rudd, you’re already so old, with no children, no husband... You need a family.”

Lorenzo stopped midway. This was truly difficult for him. He wanted to apologize again, but the words got caught in his throat.

”With your temperament, you probably wouldn’t enjoy a monotonous retired life, am I right? That would be like waiting for death. So I thought you could be the director in my stead.

Many children need care... It’s practically brimming with descendants.”

Lorenzo spoke nonsense, but this time, neither he nor Mrs. Van Rudd found it funny.

A train stopped at the platform, billowing steam. Through the fog, people leaned towards the train, carrying luggage, heading towards different distant destinations.

Mrs. Van Rudd let out a long sigh as she accepted the file envelope Lorenzo handed her.

”Thank you,” Lorenzo said.

She picked up her luggage and stood, not rushing to leave, gazing at the limitless sky beyond the glass dome.

”What a pity, I still couldn’t board the airship. I truly wanted to touch the sky again.”

”Are you referring to the Reichenbach?”

”Yes.”

”Actually, I ended up blowing that thing to pieces, crashing it onto the ridge.”

It wasn’t clear if Lorenzo was serious or joking, though it seemed more like a joke.

She knew this guy well; whenever something sad happened, he liked to crack jokes and talk nonsense, trying to dispel the sadness a bit, but this time it felt like a flood, rendering Lorenzo’s nonsense meaningless.

Mrs. Van Rudd never looked at Lorenzo again. She picked up her luggage and walked silently towards the train to leave.

”Will you hate me, Mrs. Van Rudd?”

Lorenzo watched her back and suddenly asked.

Mrs. Van Rudd stopped, and after a long while, she slowly turned around and gave Lorenzo one last look.

”Just like you said, everyone is human, everyone has emotions, having lived together for so long, even if I wanted to hate you, I couldn’t.”

”I don’t hate you, Lorenzo Holmes, I just... I just don’t want to see you anymore.”

Lorenzo hung his head low, like a scolded child.

”The key is in the mailbox.”

The last words carried on the wind, making Lorenzo lift his head abruptly, but he could only see the pale mist and the tightly shut train door.

The train slowly left Old Dunling, disappearing below the horizon, leaving Lorenzo alone on the platform, with wind rustling through abandoned newspapers, casting a desolate scene under the dazzling sunlight.