The Sorcerer's Handbook

Chapter 249: Where Did You Meet a Wild Woman Like That?

If only I could hate you,

Hate you with all my strength,

Even avoid running into you...[1]

Iger softly hummed the theme song of the drama he had just finished, jotting down his thoughts in his notebook. This marked yet another series he had completed from the top ten of the Annual Hot Drama List.

Yes, even entertainment series were ranked here. Points from the Gospel Ranking were distributed proportionally among investors, producers, actors, and crew members. These rankings ensured that the quality of dramas in the Gospel Kingdom far exceeded anything produced in the Blood Moon Kingdom.

It wasn’t that Iger favored foreign productions blindly. The Blood Moon Kingdom, for instance, prioritized popularity above all else. Actors with the largest fan bases captured the majority of profits, often regardless of talent or story quality.

In the Gospel Kingdom, however, writers wielded influence equal to that of directors. They had the authority to oversee casting and production, and also claimed the largest share of profits. The result was a flawlessly paced story, with each second crafted to grip viewers, turning them into relentless binge-watchers who couldn’t tear themselves away until the next episode.

Beyond storytelling, the Gospel Kingdom outclassed its rival in every aspect of production, including cameras, techniques, dialogue, casting, hardware, and software. The gap between the two industries was as vast as the distance between the Continent of Time and the Sea of Knowledge; they weren’t even on the same plane.

Iger was increasingly convinced that the Blood Moon Kingdom was the worst nation in the world. Its cities were inferior, its culture paled, and even its cult leaders were weaker than the Everlasting Doom of the Gospel Kingdom. Beyond a slightly rounder moon, it had nothing to offer.

However, Iger wasn’t merely watching for pleasure. He sped through the episodes at eight times the normal rate, analyzing the desires of the Gospel Kingdom’s people. Entertainment reflected the collective psyche, and the most popular works revealed it most clearly

In the Blood Moon Kingdom, for example, romance dramas often began with sudden, extraordinary events, reflecting a craving for exceptional love and dissatisfaction with mundane life. Crime dramas portrayed protagonists ensnared by corporations, politicians, or high-ranking officials, expressing the public’s frustrations. Even urban dramas in which high-potential infants were sent to low-status households and low-potential ones to elite homes revealed society’s obsession with upbringing and social mobility.

Apocalyptic dramas, which had grown increasingly popular in recent years, depicted sudden disasters that razed everything, with protagonists seizing the chaos to claim their glory. The stories were so wildly over-the-top that it was as if the entire kingdom would need more prisons just to contain all the chaos they inspired.

Part of Iger’s preparations as a fraudster involved him studying what kinds of dramas clients liked. If a client enjoyed apocalyptic dramas, he would steer the conversation toward social criticism and discontent. If a client preferred romances, he would talk about his own love stories. With his looks, any romantic tale involving him seemed natural, believable. The content audiences consumed reflected their deepest desires, and the preferences of a nation’s citizens revealed its underlying conflicts.

From his analysis, Iger discovered that the two most popular genres in the Gospel Kingdom were career dramas and household struggle dramas. Occasionally, a single series would blend elements of both.

Career dramas focused on particular professions, such as Red Hat specialists, professional gamers, rope-trick competitors, fashion designers, medics, chefs, and more. The protagonist would enter a new field, gradually master it, and ultimately rise to the top of the Gospel Ranking, achieving success in both career and romance.

Household struggle dramas revolved around family conflicts. Often, the elder male heir lacked talent, while a younger, illegitimate sibling quickly climbed the Gospel Ranking. Both sides battled openly and in secret for the family inheritance.

A series that blended both elements might follow a rebellious protagonist who must master the family’s ancestral profession to secure the legacy. With determination and skill, the protagonist would ultimately rise to the top of the field and earn a place on the Gospel Ranking.

For Iger, both genres offered a window into society. Career dramas showed that no profession was inherently superior, and unlike the hollow slogans of the Blood Moon Kingdom, professional equality here meant equal rewards. In any field with a ranking list, anyone at the top, including even a lowly social writer, could earn points on par with a sorcerer professor.

At first glance, household struggle dramas seemed like tales of prominent families, but at their core, they revolved around a real-world issue involving the distribution of inheritance. Through immersive viewing, Iger began to grasp the concept of family. Having spent his entire life in the Blood Moon Kingdom, he still couldn’t understand why anyone would fight over a child, yet he accepted it as it was.

In the Gospel Kingdom, parents passed down not only their wealth but also the skills they had honed in their professions. If the parents were Chosen themselves, their children would naturally have a higher chance of becoming Chosen themselves.

The problem arose when there were two children. What if one were talented but disagreeable, while the other was obedient yet untalented? This tension formed the fertile ground in which household struggle dramas thrived, striking a chord with audiences and explaining their widespread popularity.

Both genres shared a common backbone, the Gospel Ranking. It appeared in nearly every drama, acting as the spark of conflict, the protagonist’s ultimate goal, or the driving force behind the plot. In most plots, it seemed to convey the message that achieving a place on the list and becoming a Chosen solved every problem, while failing to become one meant being a loser.

In practice, this made little difference. Even in the Blood Moon Kingdom, those without status or wealth were expendable. Here, the measure of worth had simply shifted from social standing to rankings, but the stakes remained just as high.

There was always something for people to chase, a standard by which worth was measured. Even in orphanages, a child who received frequent praise held a higher status than one constantly plagued by a runny nose.

Iger didn’t think the rankings were bad. In fact, he found them fantastic. Fair, just, and supposedly administered by the divine... he only invoked such labels when trying to deceive a few less perceptive clients. Even a fraudster like him found the Gospel Rankings absurd, which only emphasized how ridiculous they really were.

Compared to the Blood Moon Kingdom, where the Moonshadow Clan maintained social stability and the Blood Saint Clan drove technological progress while all other clans existed merely as cogs or fuel, the Gospel Kingdom’s ranking system was leagues ahead. It pushed citizens to maximize their potential, squeezing every ounce of talent from them. In terms of efficiently mobilizing a population, the Blood Moon Lord could certainly take lessons from the Omniscient Weaver.

Flipping through his notebook, Iger noted the strange psychological patterns revealed in the dramas. Most female protagonists were predetermined from the start. No matter what third parties appeared, nothing could interfere with their fates. Stories featuring bizarre rumors about the sewers recurred frequently. The details varied, but they revealed a genuine fear of sewers among the people of the Gospel Kingdom.

What truly puzzled Iger was the absence of any court dramas. He was curious about the empire’s royal family and assumed the public shared the same fascination. Perhaps the royal family had even issued an order forbidding their production. Some children’s animated films did feature the royals, but Iger never watched animation. He considered it for children and a waste of his time.

Glancing at the time, he left the media room to have breakfast in the living room. Just then, Ashe stormed out of the game room, swearing at the top of his lungs.

”Up playing virtual games so early?” Iger asked.

”What else am I supposed to do? I haven’t spent any money, so I have to grind for levels and gear,” Ashe replied, irritation evident.

”No, I mean, don’t you have anything else to do at this hour? You don’t really think you’re on vacation, do you? At least spend time gathering intel, reading, or watching documentaries.”

Ashe paused thoughtfully. ”I’m analyzing the habits of virtual game players, mapping their behaviors, and pinpointing their pain points... to prepare for our plan, which hasn’t even started yet.”

”Any results?”

”I just got killed in the wild for the tenth time. Shows what kind of bastards these players are.”

”Then why not stop playing?”

”But it’s fun! The story is great, the graphics are amazing, and while I can’t beat other players, I can handle the monsters. The combat feels incredible.”

Ashe ground his teeth. ”Actually... with even a little money, I could have gotten the full experience. At least then I could escape when I lose to other players. The problem is... I don’t have any. When will the lady of the house give me some?”

”If Annan won’t give you money, can’t you earn it yourself?”

”How?”

”Create a female character and charm male players into sending you gifts. You can bypass the bracelet restrictions, and Annan won’t interfere.”

Ashe looked conflicted. ”But I can’t act cute like a girl. I’m not sure anyone would fall for it.”

”Have you just skipped past the mental barrier of acting cute and jumped straight to thinking about how to be adorable? If I’d met you earlier, you might have been my partner,” Iger teased. ”Just think about your cute daughter and copy her habits.”

”Copying a little girl is too weird. No thanks, Auntie Perskin,” Ashe replied.

As the two sparred playfully, Ashe asked, ”By the way, Iger, do you know a quick way to calm someone down without using a spirit?”

”I’ll show you. First, form your hands into a blade, then strike toward the person’s neck at a 45-degree angle. Chances are, they’ll calm down forever.”

Ashe clasped his hands in a pleading gesture, winking. ”Sir Iger, please, have mercy and teach me!”

Iger paused for a moment. This might be the first time he’s begging me...

He scratched his head impatiently, then swiftly struck Ashe’s nape with a hand-blade.

Ashe protested, ”Why hit my neck if you’re not going to tell me?”

Iger said bluntly, ”To calm you down. This method works for someone like you. Different ages, appearances, heights, and races require different approaches. Without specifics, this is the safest option.”

”Ohhh!” Ashe nodded eagerly, trusting the expert. ”Okay, the person is a well-built, skirt-wearing, slightly shorter nineteen-year-old female with constantly changing hair color and style. She is lively, elegant, cold, and scheming, and primarily uses the Fist and Claw class.”

”Annan?” Iger asked cautiously.

”Nope, not Annan,” Ashe replied.

Iger froze. ”Σ(っ°Д°;)っ Where did you meet a wild woman like that?”

1. These are the lyrics of the popular Cantonese song Love Finds You in Memories (爱在记忆中找你) by Raymond Lam. Feel free to check it out! The song is amazing! ☜