The Programmer Cultivator

After a full day of work, Fang Bai finally came up with three rough drafts. He brought them before Zhang Deming and said, ”Senior Uncle, you’re familiar with the Celestial Universe Film and Television Path. Could you help me see which one would be more effective?”

There were three versions. The first was in the traditional immortal, sage-like style, but with a few of his own special effects thrown in as a nod to tradition. Zhang Deming took one look at it and dismissed it.

’Since the announcement is going out to the entire Sect, what I need is something that will grab the disciples’ attention and make them remember me, all without cheapening my image. That is, after all, one of the main purposes of a Peak Master’s announcement. And this version... it’s not fundamentally different from what’s been done before.’

The second version was presented as a short story, almost like an autobiography. It was a bit too long. While it might resonate with many of the lower-ranking disciples, Zhang Deming didn’t immediately settle on it.

The final version actually had a disciple cameo!

Looking at the final version, Zhang Deming’s eyes lit up. ”This is the one,” he said.

Fang Bai was taken aback. He had thought this would be the version Zhang Deming would dislike the most, as he had used the Celestial Universe philosophy for it, applying exaggerated, story-like methods to real elements.

”Senior Uncle, are you sure you don’t want to reconsider? I’m satisfied with all three versions, but the one you’ve chosen... the current disciples might love it, but... the other Senior Uncles might not,” Fang Bai said hesitantly.

”This is the one!” Zhang Deming shook his head. He paused, then waved his hand. An image of Pei Xiaoxiao appeared. He added, ”Change the disciple cameo to her.”

Fang Bai’s eyes brightened. ”Senior Sister Pei? Senior Uncle, don’t tell me you actually used a Spirit Nurturing Bead to help her achieve Enlightenment Dao and advance...”

Zhang Deming ignored his question. ”Let’s leave it at that. I’m heading back now. If there are no major changes, just submit it to Senior Brother Gan when you’re done. The exchange conference is imminent, and I haven’t even returned to my own territory yet. There’s still a lot to do.”

”Th-.... very well. I understand.” With that, Fang Bai bowed to Zhang Deming.

...

”Fang Shouli, get your ass out here! If you keep stalling me like this, I won’t be able to finish my task! When I get punished for it, I swear I’m not letting you off the hook!”

Both Zhang Deming and Fang Bai froze. Zhang Deming looked at Fang Bai and asked, ”What trouble have you gotten yourself into now? For someone to dare come storming the Array Department’s Etiquette Pavilion, they must have some serious backing, right?”

Shouli was Fang Bai’s Daoist name. In the Sect, any disciple who had formally taken a master would receive one.

This wasn’t the ordinary relationship one had with a senior uncle. This was the kind of master-disciple bond forged through a formal ceremony with three bows, nine kowtows, and the serving of tea. It meant that no matter how successful the disciple became, the master remained their master for life.

It was a relationship where the master’s glory came from the disciple, and the disciple’s prestige came from the master—a bond like that of a father and son. This was one of the few inherited customs in Hongmeng that had remained unchanged from ancient times to the present day. It was just that not many disciples underwent such a formal master-disciple ceremony anymore.

Hearing the shouting, Fang Bai looked embarrassed. ”Uh... Senior Uncle, it’s not what you think. He’s looking for you.”

”Looking for me? I’ve never even been to your Inner Sect Array Department. I don’t recall offending anyone,” Zhang Deming replied.

”Er, well... about that...”

”Fang Shouli, I’m telling you, you’d better hand over the Senior Uncle right now! If you keep hiding him, I’m going to tear this place apart...!”

Before Fang Bai could get the words out, a young man with a Duality Cultivation burst in, his Spiritual Power surging as he pushed past a group of Gate Guard Disciples trying to block his way.

His whole body pulsed with Spiritual Power and his expression was grim, as if he was ready to start a massive brawl right there in the Etiquette Photography Pavilion if anyone else dared to get in his way.

He was still shouting as he barged in, but he froze mid-sentence the moment he saw Zhang Deming. He instantly forgot all his previous anger and rushed before Zhang Deming, saying excitedly:

”Senior Uncle, I’ve finally found you! Senior Uncle, please, have pity on this disciple! Come with me to try on your Dharma Robe so we can make the final adjustments.

The grand assembly is in just over two days! Even if the Dharma Robe is already refined and we only need to alter its appearance, it’s still a Three-Star Magical Artifact! It takes time for us disciples to make changes.

Please, just do us this one favor and take pity on us! Life is hard enough for us traditional Artifact Cultivators. If you don’t show us some mercy, Senior Uncle, we’re done for!”

Zhang Deming stood stiffly as the young man hugged his leg, looking down at him in bewilderment. One moment, the man had been seething with furious, surging Spiritual Power; the next, he was at Zhang Deming’s feet, sobbing with snot and tears.

For a moment, Zhang Deming was completely dumbfounded. His face twitched as he tried to pull his leg away, but he couldn’t get it free! He could only look helplessly at Fang Bai and ask, ”What is going on?”

The disciple sobbing at his feet froze, then instantly jumped up and pointed a finger at Fang Bai’s nose, yelling, ”Aha! So, Fang Shouli, you intercepted him for your own gain and misrepresented Senior Uncle’s intentions! I’m not done with you for this.

Even if I have to take this to the Ancestor or Peak Master Fanx, I’ll see you sent to Wanghui Peak for labor reform, or my name isn’t Yang!”

”Go ahead! As long as I can get this recording done right and bring honor to... to our Senior Uncle, I’d willingly go to labor reform and shovel dung for a hundred years!” Fang Bai shot back, not to be outdone.

Yang Hongjun was taken aback by Fang Bai’s sudden, ass-kissing counterattack. He paused for a moment, then sneered, ”Hah, what a joke. So your Shadow Ceremony Department gets to bring honor to Senior Uncle, but my Magic Robe Department would just be an embarrassment? Or are you looking down on our Artifact Refining Department?”

”I never said that...”

”Ahem... what is going on?” Zhang Deming coughed twice, interrupting the two before they could descend into a full-blown spat.