The Forsaken Hero

Elise remained quiet for a long time, her eyes distant and shimmering with sorrow. The silence grew heavy, suffocating. Feeling the weight of it, I reached out and gently took her hand. She flinched at my touch, but I drew her closer, pulling her to my side. She came reluctantly, still avoiding my gaze. I held her hand, my grip firm, and waited.

After what felt like an eternity, tears welled in her eyes and spilled over, tracing paths down her cheeks. Her grip tightened on mine, but she made no sound, the sobs trapped in her throat.

”It’s alright, Elise,” I said, giving her hand a comforting squeeze. ”Let it all out.”

And she did. The dam broke, and the tears flowed freely, an endless stream of sorrow. I pulled her close, wrapping my arms around her trembling form. I held her tight as her body shook with sobs, stroking her hair and whispering soothing words.

From what little I’d gathered, Elise had been awake for months, ever since the battle in Brithlite. Yet, her pain felt raw, as fresh as the day I’d healed her. I didn’t fully grasp our situation, but I knew we were likely alone, three souls adrift in a sea of demons. It couldn’t be easy to confront such trauma in this environment, surrounded by enemies and with no one to trust. No wonder her emotions were overflowing now.

Eventually, the sobs subsided into sniffles, the torrent of tears slowing to a trickle. I gently wiped her cheeks with my thumb, offering a final squeeze before easing back slightly. Still, I kept one arm around her, a comforting presence.

She leaned into me, mimicking Sari’s familiar gesture, shivering in the aftermath of her grief. She felt fragile, delicate as a porcelain doll, as if she might shatter at the slightest touch.

”I’m so sorry, Elise,” I whispered, my voice thick with emotion. I knew the horrors she had endured, the pain she carried. ”I’m so sorry I wasn’t there, that I couldn’t protect you from that monster. No one should have to suffer what you did.”

She shook her head, guilt replacing despair in her voice. ”I wanted it. I begged him to hurt me, to let his men...”

Her voice broke with a sob.

”No, Elise,” I said firmly. ”That wasn’t you. Alverin twisted everything, his truth a web of lies.”

”You don’t understand,” she cried, pressing a hand to her chest as if to quell the ache within. ”I didn’t resist. I wanted it all. I wanted to be used. I wanted to believe his lies. Xiviyah, I hated you for not wanting it, too. How can I ever forgive myself?”

She dissolved into tears once more. This time, I didn’t try to comfort her with words. I simply held her, my presence a silent reassurance. It was pointless to argue; some wounds ran too deep for simple platitudes. I knew this pain intimately, the struggle to reconcile with the past. Only in Heartland had I begun to heal, to understand that true recovery meant confronting the darkness, not denying it.

And so, for hours, I listened. I let her speak, to unravel the tangled threads of her trauma, to give voice to the pain she had carried for so long.

Her confessions resonated deep within me, each word a hammer blow against my soul. Even as her expression lightened with release, I felt a growing burden in my chest. The things she described were a horrific echo of my own past, a twisted amalgamation of the abuse I’d suffered in both lives. Though her experiences hadn’t plumbed the full depths of my own trauma, hearing it happen to Elise, to someone so pure and innocent...it ignited a fury within me.

”X-Xiviyah?” Elise whimpered, flinching away.

I started, realizing I’d been unconsciously emitting my aura, a suffocating pressure filling the tent. I forced myself to calm down, the anger receding like a tide.

”I’m sorry,” I murmured, gently smoothing her hair away from her fear-stricken face. ”I just wish I had more time to make Alverin pay for what he did.”

”No, please,” she pleaded, shaking her head. ”I’m not worth it. You shouldn’t have rescued me, not after everything I’ve done.”

”Don’t say that, Elise,” I said, my tail lashing in agitation.

”But it’s true,” she insisted. ”Haven’t you been listening? I—”

”Elise,” I interrupted, my voice low and dangerous.

She stiffened, her eyes darting to mine, taking in the intensity burning there.

”You are worth every single soul lost in that war,” I said, my voice unwavering. ”I burned cities, slaughtered armies, and let demons ravage entire kingdoms. Do you think I would have done all that for someone worthless, someone who is nothing more than a plaything to be used and discarded?”

”B-But—”

”No,” I cut her off. ”You’re hurt and afraid, and I understand that better than anyone. You need time to heal, but I won’t let you believe Alveron’s lies. You are not worthless, no matter what he did or said. Your soul is bright and beautiful, and no one can ever take that from you.”

It might have sounded cliché, but they were the words I’d yearned to hear in my darkest moments. Only when Tana had pleaded for me, her words echoing these same sentiments, that I’d truly turned away from despair. I’d literally been clinging to the precipice in Vithrass’ lair, ready to fall, and it was the love of another that had given me the strength to pull myself back, to refuse to surrender to the darkness.

Tears welled in Elise’s eyes, her body trembling, her gaze pleading for something she couldn’t articulate. I responded as naturally as though she had, embracing her again and holding her as violent sobs wracked her body. I felt a rush of empathy, tears welling up in my own eyes. We didn’t speak, nor did we have to; we just sat together and cried, letting the storm of emotions loose.

I lost any sense of time, content with holding one I loved in my arms, comforting her. She had done the same for me many a quiet night at Western University, tenderly nursing me back from the despair I’d fallen into after shattering my soul and being tortured by my enemies after the fall of the city. No matter how long it took, I would be there for Elise to return the love and kindness she had given freely.

It wasn’t until the warm glow of the setting sun began to fade, the light dimming in the tent, that her sobs began to still, and she fell limp and trembling in my arms.

Elise sniffled and dragged her sleeve over her eyes, wiping away the tears. ”Xiviyah, you’re different. You’ve changed.”

I nodded and smiled faintly, continuing to stroke her hair. ”Yeah, my shoulder stopped glowing. Honestly, I’ve gotten kind of fond of the look now. Not that I’ll miss it,” I added hastily.”

She blinked in surprise and turned to look at me, her eyes still glistening with moisture. ”You... you smiled.”

She said it with such disbelief and awe that the corners of my lips twitched up even higher. ”It was all thanks to you, you know,” I said, tenderly brushing away a lingering tear from her cheek. ”As you said, I’ve changed. And though I wish the circumstances of our reunion were a little better, I’m glad I finally got a chance to show you.”

A sudden urge to yawn overtook me, and I rubbed my horn tiredly. ”Sorry, I know I just woke up, but I’m feeling a bit tired all of a sudden.”

”Perhaps it’s because you just did the impossible again and healed the sunpurge from your soul. You always did like pushing yourself.”

”It wasn’t particularly painful, but it was starting to annoy me,” I said with a shrug, relishing the lack of pain in the expression.

For the briefest moment, there was a flash of amusement in her eyes, of the old Elise. It wasn’t much, but it was a start, one that gave me hope she would, in time, heal and find herself again.

A cough came from the tent flap, causing us both to look up. R’lissia stood there, shaking her head wryly.

”It annoyed you?” she asked, raising her eyebrow. ”Is that really enough to invent an entirely new branch of magic over?”

I blushed faintly, rubbing my horn in embarrassment. ”How long have you been there?”

She smiled, her eyes taking in the closeness between me and Elise. ”Not too long, just a few seconds. It’s not good for you to be up for too long, but the demon wanted to see you. You two will have more time later, I promise.”

Elise squeezed my hand and then stood. ”Wait, does it have to be now?” I asked. I didn’t want to see her leave yet.

”I think it would be best if you spoke with him alone,” Elise said, looking away. This time, though, it wasn’t in shame or embarrassment but...guilt? Was she hiding something from me? ”You have a lot to catch up on, and I think I would just get in the way.”

I opened my mouth to protest, but R’lissea silenced me with a sharp look. She took Elise’s hand and, with a nod at me, tugged her away.

”He’ll be waiting outside, on the crest,” she said over her shoulder.

Though I’d been exhausted earlier, the fatigue vanished, replaced by a wave of trepidation. After all this time, I was finally going to meet the Lord of Ash face-to-face. He had done so much for me and granted me so many favors. I owed him an immense debt of gratitude, not only for Kahlen but for saving me and Haven. I didn’t understand how he had done it, why he hadn’t shown himself, but something told me the answers would soon be revealed.

A nervous tremor ran down my spine as I stood, my gaze falling upon my spatial ring resting on a small, foldable stand near the cot. I slipped it on my finger and rummaged inside until I found a dress, quickly changing from my nightdress into something more suitable. It felt strange to dress without the familiar sting of the sun purge, and I couldn’t help but twirl giddily, reveling in the sensation of the fabric whispering painlessly against my skin.

Perhaps by chance, or perhaps guided by some unconscious impulse, I chose the garment I’d bought with Tana—a beautiful white satin dress with a red trim and ribbon belt. It felt fitting, a symbol of the freedom I’d first tasted in Heartland, the freedom I now embraced fully.

After all, I was free. Free from everything that had ever bound me. Free from the slave crest, the soul binder, the sun purge, and the Circle. Regardless of what the Lord of Ash might demand in return for his favors, I would never again relinquish this newfound liberty.