Saving The Monster Race Starts With Breeding The Elf Village

Back in the centaur village, inside the town hall where the elders had been waiting, another guest had arrived.

”This is OUTRAGEOUS!”

Poppy stood in the center of the hall, her tiny arms crossed, her silver hair practically bristling with indignation.

She had arrived twenty minutes ago after having received word that Luca was doing something in the council hall. As queen, there was absolutely no way she was going to let that go uninvestigated.

Everyone in this village was her responsibility. And if the Hero was in there bullying her precious elders, then she was going to march right in and defend them.

But when she stepped she found that Luca wasn’t even there at all!

He had vanished through some kind of portal, and the elders were refusing to tell her anything.

”What do you mean it’s a surprise?” Poppy demanded, stamping her tiny hoof against the floor. ”I am your Queen! I order you to tell me what’s going on immediately!”

Agnes, who had been on the receiving end of Poppy’s demands simply smiled with the serene patience of a grandmother.

”My lady, it truly is a surprise. You will simply have to wait, just like everyone else.”

”But I don’t want to wait! I want to know now!”

”Patience is a virtue, my queen.”

”I am the queen! I don’t need virtues! I need answers!”

But Agnes refused. Poppy, sensing that she was faltering, decided to use her authority.

”If you don’t tell me right now, I’ll...I’ll...” She cast around desperately for a suitable threat. ”I’ll decree that all the hay in the village be replaced with the itchy kind! The kind that makes your fur all scratchy!”

The elders exchanged glances. Several of them were visibly struggling not to laugh.

”That is a truly fearsome threat, my lady.” Agnes said diplomatically. ”But I’m afraid the answer is still no.”

”AAAAAGH!” Poppy threw her hands up in utter frustration and turned to Thea, who had been standing quietly nearby, watching the exchange with fond exasperation.

”Thea! They’re being mean to me! Make them tell me!”

Thea smiled gently. ”My lady, if the elders wish to keep this as a surprise, perhaps we should respect their wishes.”

”You’re supposed to be on my side!”

”I am always on your side, my lady. Which is why I think you’ll enjoy the surprise much more if you let it remain a surprise.”

Poppy’s mouth opened, closed, and opened again. She looked like a fish that had been unexpectedly yanked from a very comfortable pond.

Finally, she let out a defeated groan and slumped against Thea’s leg.

”Fine. Fine. But it had better be a really good surprise. The best surprise in the history of surprises. Or else!”

While Poppy sulked, Thea made her way over to Sigrid, who was standing near the far wall.

Unlike the elders, who were resting on their mattresses, Sigrid had been pacing restlessly for the past hour.

Her tail swished back and forth with barely contained energy, and her ears kept twitching toward the spot where Luca’s portal had disappeared.

”Sigrid.” Thea said quietly. ”What exactly is going on here? The elders are being unusually secretive, and I’ve never seen half of them this excited. What kind of surprise could possibly—”

Sigrid turned to her with a look that Thea had never seen on the commander’s face before.

It was...mischievous.

”You’ll find out soon enough, Thea.”

Thea blinked. ”Excuse me?”

”Just like the rest of the village. You’ll have to wait and see.” Sigrid’s lips curved into a small, knowing smile. ”It’ll be worth it. I promise.”

Thea stared at her Sigrid with open disbelief.”Sigrid. You. Of all people. Keeping secrets?”

Sigrid laughed, while Thea shook her head in wonder. Whatever this surprise was, it had transformed Sigrid from a stoic warrior into a giddy schoolgirl.

She hadn’t seen the commander this excited since...well, ever.

”Fine. Fine, keep your secrets. But I hope you know...”

Thea gestured toward the door, where the muffled sounds of a growing crowd could be heard.

”...word has already spread to the rest of the village. There are centaurs gathering outside right now, all of them waiting to see whatever this mysterious surprise is supposed to be. If it doesn’t live up to expectations, there’s going to be a riot.”

”It’ll live up to expectations.” Sigrid said, and her voice was so certain that Thea found herself believing her despite herself.

—

Just as Poppy was opening her mouth to begin yet another round of questioning, a familiar shimmer of blue light crackled into existence in the center of the room.

The portal opened and Luca stepped through.

”Sir Luca!”

Sigrid was the first to reach him, her hooves carrying her across the hall in three quick strides.

”Did you get it? Did everything go well? Are you—”

She stopped herself, suddenly aware of how eager she sounded. Her cheeks flushed slightly, and she took a half-step back, composing herself with visible effort.

”I mean—welcome back. I trust your journey was successful.”

Luca’s smile was warm. ”It went perfectly, Sigrid. Everything’s ready.”

Before he could say another word, the elders had surrounded him. Agnes, Filda, and all the others crowded close, their voices overlapping in a cascade of anxious questions.

”Did you really find what you needed?”

”Can it truly be fixed!?”

”Hero, please—tell us you weren’t just saying those things to make us feel better—”

”How soon can we—”

”Everyone, please!” Luca held up both hands, laughing. ”One at a time! I can’t answer questions if I can’t understand them!”

But before anyone could regroup, a new voice cut through the chaos

”MOVE! Out of my way! I need to talk to the Hero RIGHT NOW!”

The crowd of elders parted just enough for Poppy to squeeze through. The little unicorn queen planted herself directly in front of Luca, her hands on her hips, her horn practically quivering with indignation.

She tilted her head back to meet his eyes, which, given their height difference, required her to crane her neck at an angle that was probably uncomfortable.

”Hero! I demand to know what’s going on! No one will tell me anything! They keep saying it’s a ’surprise’ and that I have to ’wait’ and be ’patient,’ and I am tired of being patient!”

She jabbed a finger toward his chest or rather, toward his stomach, since that was as high as she could reach.

”I am the queen of this village, and I refuse to be left in the dark! Tell me what’s happening right now!”

”You’ll find out soon enough.” He said while poking her puffed out cheeks.

”That’s what everyone keeps saying!”

But before Poppy could go any further, Luca leaned down, bringing his face closer to hers, and his voice dropped to a whisper.

”Besides, after what you did this morning, sending an entire army of little ponies to attack me, I’m not sure you deserve to know the secret early.”

Poppy’s indignation evaporated instantly. Her eyes went wide, and she took a stumbling step backward, her face cycling through several shades of pink.

”Th-that was—I didn’t—that wasn’t my fault!” She sputtered. ”Mavis was the one who—she whispered in my ear like a little devil, and I couldn’t—she’s very persuasive—I had nothing to do with it!”

She scrambled behind Thea, peeking out from behind the older centaur’s flank like a child hiding from a scolding parent.

”It was all Mavis! ALL OF IT! I’m completely innocent!”

Thea sighed. ”My lady, you just threw your own subject under the carriage.”

”She’ll be fine! Mavis is tough! She can handle it!”

Luca shook his head, still smiling.

No matter how he looked at it, Poppy was a breath of fresh air in this village—bright and silly and utterly, refreshingly genuine.

But then his expression flickered. ”Oh. I totally forgot something.”

The elders tensed. ”Is something wrong, Hero?” Agnes asked, her voice sharp with concern.

”Hm? Oh, no, no, nothing wrong. I just forgot to bring something back to the elf village.”

He waved his hand, and a portal shimmered open beside him.

Plop! Plop! Plop!

From its depths emerged a medium-sized trolley stacked high with cardboard boxes. Their sides were had a logo that no one in this world would recognize.

Luca had just turned to call through the portal for someone from the elf village when Poppy shot out from behind Thea like an arrow from a bow.

”What is that?!” She was already at the trolley,l, her eyes gleaming with insatiable curiosity. ”What’s in the boxes?! Let me see! Let me see!”

”Wait, Your Majesty, those aren’t—”

Too late. Poppy had already pried open the topmost box with the determination of a squirrel cracking a particularly stubborn nut.

The cardboard flap lifted, and—

The smell hit the room!

It was a complex aroma, layered and intoxicating: the savory richness of grilled meat, the sharp tang of melted cheese, the golden warmth of fresh fries, and beneath it all, the sweet, creamy scent of milkshakes and sodas.

It spread through the hall in seconds, wrapping around every centaur present and making their noses twitch in unison.

”What...What is that?” Filda breathed, her eyes going slightly unfocused.

”I’ve never smelled anything like it.”

”It’s so warm. So...rich.”

”It smells like...like happiness. Is that strange? That’s strange, right?”

”My mouth is watering. Is everyone else’s mouth watering? Please tell me I’m not the only one!”

Poppy, who was closest to the box, had gone completely still. Her eyes were glassy. Her nose was twitching at approximately the same frequency as a hummingbird’s wings. A tiny drop of drool had appeared at the corner of her mouth.

”I don’t know what this is.” She whispered reverently. ”But I want it. I want all of it! Thea, as your queen, I command you to acquire this for me immediately!”

”My lady, I don’t think—”

”Thea. This is a royal matter. Possibly the most royal matter that has ever mattered!”

But before Thea could respond, a voice rang out from the portal behind the trolley.

”HOLD ON JUST A SECOND NOW!”

Every centaur in the room turned.

A head with bright eyes and an expression of fierce protectiveness had emerged from the portal. Then shoulders. Then a very round, very pregnant belly.

And finally, the rest of Lulu, who stepped fully into the hall and planted herself between the trolley and the gathered centaurs like a mother bear defending her cubs.

”Back away!” She announced. ”No one touches the food! This is elf property! Protected by elven law! And also by me, personally!”

The elders stared at her. More specifically, they stared at her belly—swollen and beautiful, the unmistakable curve of pregnancy that made something warm flicker in their maternal hearts.

”Oh my.” One of them murmured. ”She’s...”

”Pregnant.” Another finished. ”Look at her. Absolutely glowing.”

”She reminds me of someone.” Another elder said, tapping her chin thoughtfully.

”Leona.” Agnes said immediately. ”She’s Leona’s daughter, isn’t she? I’d recognize that fire anywhere.”

”You’re right! She looks just like Leona did when she was young—before all that unpleasantness with Julius.”

Poppy, meanwhile, tugged urgently on Thea’s sleeve.

”Thea. Thea, look. That elf has a really fat stomach. Someone should tell her to exercise more. Should I tell her? As a queen, I feel like I should say something.”

Thea closed her eyes briefly, gathering patience.

”My lady, she’s not fat. She’s pregnant.”

Poppy blinked. ”Pregnant?”

”Yes, my lady. She has a baby growing inside her.”

”A...baby?” Poppy’s eyes went impossibly wide. ”A tiny little...baby? Inside her stomach? Right now?”

”Yes, my lady.”

”A baby elf? A tiny, adorable, probably very soft baby elf?”

”In a few months, yes.”

Poppy turned back to stare at Lulu with an expression of complete, unabashed wonder.

Her earlier indignation about the food had been entirely replaced by the particular fascination that only a very small, very innocent creature could have for the miracle of new life.

”Wow.” She breathed. ”That’s...That’s amazing. Thea, I want a baby too!”

”My lady, that’s not really how it—”

”I WANT A BABY ELF!”

”Your Majesty, please—”

But Lulu was not paying attention to Poppy’s existential crisis. She was too busy defending her provisions.

”I know what you’re all thinking.” She declared, her eyes narrowed. ”You’re thinking, ’That smell is absolutely irresistible. We should just go over there and take some of those burgers and fries for ourselves.’ I can see it in your faces. Especially your face!”

She pointed at Filda, who looked slightly guilty.

”But I’m warning you—if anyone touches this food, I will immediately declare war between the elf race and the centaur race!”

Hearing this declaration, the elders laughed it while thinking it was rather adorable.

Poppy, however, took genuine offense.

”Thea! Did you hear that?! She’s threatening us! We should respond! I’ll go talk to her right now—”

”My lady, please.” Thea quickly grabbed Poppy before she could do anything rash. ”She’s one of the Hero’s wives. And she’s pregnant. You don’t want to start a conflict with a pregnant elf.”

Poppy deflated immediately.

”Fine. I’ll be magnanimous today. But only because she’s carrying a baby!”

Lulu, satisfied that her warning had been received, let out a small huff of relief. Then her gaze landed on Sigrid...

...specifically, on Sigrid’s tail and her eyes lit up!