Peerless Bodyguard of a Stunning Beauty

After the explosion, a deep pit cratered the ground where the witch had stood. Zhao Rong crawled out from behind some nearby cover, pointed to a pile of ashes, and said to his assistant and the three women, ”Alright, that takes care of the old witch for good. You can consider this pile of ashes her cremains.”

The assistant stepped forward, staring at the pile of black ash with interest. ”Holy crap, no way,” he said. ”I thought you said that witch was invulnerable to blades and bullets. How did a single demolition charge blow her to smithereens?”

Yu Lan stepped forward as well, scanning the area for any sign of the old witch. ”Looks like Zhao Rong really did finish her off.”

Lili asked curiously, ”Zhao Rong, why did your demolition charge work when our grenades couldn’t even scratch her?”

Zhao Rong smiled. ”Miss Lili, there’s something you don’t know. The best weapon against an old witch is a combination of durian and a demolition charge. First, you use the durian to cripple her. Then, you use the demolition charge to finish the job and send her off to the Western Heaven.”

Hearing this, Xuelian stepped forward, scratching the back of her head in confusion. ”Zhao Rong, where on earth did you learn a method like that? It feels so... strange, so out there, so unorthodox.”

Zhao Rong laughed. ”I actually forgot to tell you all. Besides horror movies from the Island Country, I also like Thai horror movies.

”I once saw a Thai horror flick where the main character used a combination of durian and explosives to take out an old witch. So, I figured I’d give it a shot. I never expected it to actually work, though!

”It seems like we should watch more horror movies when we’ve got free time. We can learn a lot!”

”Zhao Rong, you’re a total badass,” Xuelian said, impressed.

Zhao Rong laughed at the praise. ”Don’t get ahead of yourselves. Save the compliments for after I’ve dealt with the last two monsters.”

With that, he pointed at a Black Widow spider in the distance. ”Hey, Black Widow! If you’ve got the guts, come over here! Stop posing!”

Hearing this, the assistant and the three women looked in the direction he was pointing. About a hundred meters away, they saw a giant, black, venomous spider the size of a tank.

”Zhao Rong,” the assistant said in horror, staring at the immense spider, ”don’t tell me that tank-sized thing is the Black Widow you were talking about?”

Zhao Rong nodded. ”Yep. I always figured spiders could get pretty big, but I never imagined one could grow to the size of a tank.”

Lili, who had dropped to the ground, stared at the distant, tank-sized spider. ”Zhao Rong, how are we supposed to fight that?” she asked.

Hearing her, Zhao Rong just smiled. ”Miss Lili, do you enjoy watching military exercises?”

Lili shook her head. ”Zhao Rong, I only like watching Korean idol dramas. I’m not really into military exercises.”

Hearing this, Zhao Rong shook his head in disappointment. ”I really don’t get what’s so great about those Korean idol dramas.”

”Zhao Rong, don’t you know?” Lili replied. ”You men enjoy those films from the Island Country, while we women like to watch Korean idol dramas. In other words, Korean idol dramas are our kind of ’films’...”

Hearing Lili’s logic, Zhao Rong couldn’t help but sigh internally. No wonder these pretty boys are running rampant nowadays. It’s all the fault of those Korean idol dramas...

Seeing the black spider closing in while Zhao Rong and Lili were discussing idol dramas, Yu Lan interrupted anxiously, ”Zhao Rong! Lili! If you want to talk about dramas, can you please find another time for it? Right now, we’re about to be attacked by a giant black spider! We need a strategy to deal with it, or we’re all going to be caught, injected with venom, dissolved, and then eaten piece by piece!”

Hearing this, Zhao Rong immediately snapped back to the situation. ”Right,” he said to Yu Lan. ”To continue what I was saying—when you watch military exercises, how do ordinary soldiers deal with a tank? That’s how we’re going to deal with this massive Black Widow.”

”Zhao Rong,” the assistant said excitedly, ”does that mean we should use an anti-tank missile to punch through this Black Widow?”

”Assistant, you might not be helpful most of the time, but you’re spot on in a pinch,” Zhao Rong said, congratulating him. ”You’re absolutely right. Soldiers use anti-tank missiles to deal with tanks, so we’ll use an anti-tank missile to deal with this spider. That should do it.”

”Actually, Zhao Rong, soldiers can also use anti-tank sniper rifles against tanks,” Xuelian immediately suggested.

”Xuelian, you sound like you’re living in the forties or fifties,” the assistant immediately disagreed. ”Back when the Soviets were fighting Nazi Germany, they used anti-tank rifles. But that was decades ago! Modern tank armor is way too thick and tough. An ordinary anti-tank rifle can’t even scratch it. If we’re going to fight a tank, we have to use an anti-tank missile, preferably something like the American TOW missile. That’s what would be most effective.”

Hearing him mention using a TOW missile, Xuelian scoffed at the extravagance. ”Assistant, do you have any idea how much a single TOW missile costs? I’m telling you, you could sell that building your family owns downtown and it still probably wouldn’t be enough! We should just buy an anti-tank rifle from the Paradise Shopping Cart. After all, why use a sledgehammer to crack a nut?”

Before anyone could argue, Xuelian had already opened the Paradise Shopping Cart app on her phone, bought an anti-tank rifle, and was now holding it, aiming at the giant black spider in the distance.

When everyone saw how incredibly fast she was, they could only say in astonishment, ”Wow, Xuelian, we had no idea you were such a fast shopper.”