Last Born Of The Desdemona

Chapter 272: Chapter 272: What about my own Life?

Chapter 272 – What about my own Life?

”We...we did it.” Awa muttered, emotion thick in her voice, staring at the money that had just landed in her account.

She was still on the ground with Aminata beside her, leaning in to look at the number.

They still couldn’t quite believe it.

Never in their entire lives had they seen this much money at once, and never had they expected to.

They instinctively lifted their heads to look at Cassius, only to remember he was already gone. They were alone in the room.

”With this, Awa, with this...” Aminata smiled, her mood still trembling, ”...we can finally save ourselves. We can pay back everything Father and Mother have done for us, and take our own lives into our hands.”

”Huh?” Awa turned toward her sister, sensing something off in her tone, ”what do you mean by that?”

Aminata’s face darkened, ”You, more than anyone, know how we’ve lived these past years. We never joined a club, never allowed ourselves any entertainment or hobby, except the occasional night we spent sleeping with a man.”

Awa said nothing to that, because it was true.

”I’m tired of that life, Awa.” She moved closer, gripping her sister’s shoulders firmly, locking their silver eyes together, ”I want to live properly. I want to join the Cooking Club. You know how much I love cooking.”

”Yes, I do.” Awa smiled.

”I also want to go out more. I want to meet a man I can love, and one you could love too.”

”You still haven’t dropped the idea of us sharing the same man?” Awa said, lips twitching, ”I thought that was just a phase.”

”I can’t live without you by my side, you know that.” Aminata hugged her, ”You’re soft, annoying, and you’re always telling me what to do...”

”Because you’re unreasonable.”

”...but you’re my twin sister. And I want us to be together forever.”

”What if I don’t like the man you like?” She asked with a chuckle, her heart lighter now that the money worry was gone.

”But you will like him. Didn’t you say you’d found a man for us? Wasn’t it Sky?”

Awa grimaced, breaking the hug and sitting cross-legged on the ground.

Aminata noticed the change in her expression and mirrored her, sitting beside her, eyes drifting to the throne Angel had occupied during their meeting.

”Yes, it was Sky.” Awa whispered, ”I won’t hide it from you, sister, but I truly find myself drawn to him. He’s handsome, has a good background, and good character, from what I’ve seen. The only downside is he loves women a little too much. But—!”

”That’s not a problem for you, since you’ve always been used to sharing, since we were little, right?” Aminata guessed her sister’s thoughts easily.

Awa chuckled and nodded, ”Yes. I don’t mind sharing him. I planned to share him with you. I think we would have been happy.”

”...what changed?”

”Angel.” Awa sighed, slowly taking Aminata’s hand and stroking it gently, lovingly.

Aminata acted as though it were completely normal. Because it was. Awa did this whenever she felt anxious.

And she was always anxious about something.

”Angel and Sky are rivals, Aminata.” Awa continued, ”and now that we have a relationship with him, and even joined the Church of The Reader, we can’t afford to stay close to Sky.”

”Alright, that’s the reasonable explanation.” Aminata said, giving her sister a knowing look, ”Now give me the emotional one.”

”Angel is beautiful.”

”I’m not blind.”

”He’s always gentle, caring, and his smile feels like it could lighten even my darkest days, the ones heavy with uncertainty.” She kept stroking Aminata’s hand, ”I don’t know if it’s because he helped us, or because he’s the Blessed of the Queen, but...my heart races a little too fast whenever I think about him.”

She looked at her, ”You feel the same, don’t you, Aminata? I felt you trembling when he held your hand, and even more when he smiled. Do you like him?”

”I’m not indifferent to him.” Aminata replied curtly, ”but it’s better if we stop ourselves before this goes any further than what we already feel. He’s married, Awa. And the Desdemona only ever take one wife, for their entire lives.”

”We’ve slept with married men before.”

”That was because we needed money for ingredients, to improve our skills. We don’t need to do that anymore.”

”Yes, and I’m relieved. I was ready to sell my own body if Angel hadn’t agreed to raise the price.”

”I can’t share that relief.” Aminata’s face hardened, her voice turning cold, ”I lost my first time. No, we lost it, over money to send to our parents. Awa, I’ve never forgotten that night. I will never forget that pain. That was the night you decided to ruin yourself for our parents, and dragged me down with you.”

”I never asked you to do the same.” Awa shook her head, still stroking her sister’s hand.

”And you know I’d never let you go through anything alone.” Aminata hissed, looking at her, ”You did it on purpose.”

Awa smiled sadly and said nothing.

Aminata clicked her tongue, ”We’re not worthy of Angel. We’re tainted. We’re wretched. So let’s stop this attachment here, before it grows into something like love. It won’t do us any good.”

”So you want us to live a loveless life?” Awa said, smile tinged with hurt.

”It’s better than living a life where our love goes unanswered.” Aminata nodded, ”and maybe...maybe we’ll find someone else. Someone we won’t be ashamed to give ourselves to, because of our past. Sky was perfect. But he’s no longer an option.”

”Alright, sister. Alright. Don’t be angry with me.” Awa sighed, then slowly rested her head in Aminata’s lap, ”you always get angry so easily.”

”You irritate me.”

”I know.” Awa replied, ”Stroke my hair.”

Aminata complied without another word.

A silence followed, quiet enough that each sister’s breathing was clearly audible. Their minds wandered in every direction, turning over what kind of future awaited them.

They still couldn’t quite believe they’d changed faiths. And this decision would bring them no shortage of trouble.

Because even though the Guardian Tribe had abandoned them, their parents still believed in IT.

What would happen if they found out about the conversion?

That thought alone made Awa’s anxiety spike again.

But Aminata’s mind stayed cold.

”If it were only up to me,” she ground out, fingers sinking into Awa’s blue hair, ”I would have abandoned Father and Mother a long time ago.”

”I know.” Awa whispered.

”You’re the only reason I’m still here.”

”I know.”

”When will you let go of them? They always say they’ve done all this for us, but isn’t that just their job as parents?”

”We should be grateful, Aminata.”

”I’ve been so grateful I fucking sold my own body for them.” She snapped back, ”It’s easy for them to demand money from us, and blame us for our situation, when they know nothing about the life we’re living here! Nothing! And they’ve never once bothered to ask. Do you know why?!”

”Because—!”

”Because they want us willing to do anything, as long as it means money!” Aminata cut in, cutting off Awa’s usual attempt to excuse their parents, ”and you know it.”

Awa sighed, ”They’re our parents, Aminata. They gave birth to us. They raised us. We can’t just turn our backs on them.”

”They’ll exploit us.”

”They’re our parents.” She repeated.

Aminata gritted her teeth, ”We can’t keep living like this. And I won’t accept it. Not this time. Once we’ve paid off the debt...”

She grabbed her sister’s head, turned it, and locked their eyes together.

”...I want nothing more to do with them. I’m going to live my own life. I’m going to enjoy it, before I die realizing I spent my whole life living for them instead of for myself.”

”Would you abandon me?”

”Awa, stop.” Aminata’s eyes instantly wavered.

”You can’t abandon me. You said you can’t live without me. And I’m sorry, but,” she smiled sadly, ”I can’t abandon our parents.”

Aminata’s body began to shake, her frustration mounting until tears of anger welled up in her eyes.

”You’re manipulating me into staying with you.”

”I’m sorry.”

”You’re always sorry, Awa. Always. What about my life?”

”I am your life.” Awa said with a smile, ”We’re each other’s life. Even wanting a man is only meant to bring us closer together. You don’t need anything but me, Aminata. I’m your twin sister, I’ve been with you since before we even came into this world.”

”Yet you depend on our parents’ affection to keep going.” Aminata spat with contempt.

Awa smiled again and hugged her, ”I’m sorry. I love you. I do, Aminata. Please understand.”

Aminata clenched her jaw, tears spilling down her face.

”I’ll kill our parents one day.”

”Then you’ll kill me at the same time.”

”I’ll kill myself right after, to follow you.”

Awa paused, then whispered...

”...I can accept that.”

—End of Chapter 272—