I Might Be A Fake Cultivator

“Big Brother An, it’s such a rare opportunity for me to travel with you, yet you’re having me accompany you to the Dead Spirit Demonic Land? Woof!” Da Bai was horrified upon hearing this name, and he complained to An Lin sulkily.

The Dead Spirit Demonic Land was located in the Ancient Void State.

The Dead Spirit Demonic Land use to be the most prosperous region of the Ancient Void State. However, during the years that the Divine Dark Dao Sect was flourishing, the Bitter Blood Dark King transformed thousands of kilometers of land into a sacrificial blood pool. Hundreds of millions of living beings perished due to his evil deeds.

Because of this, the Dead Spirit Demonic Land was brimming with a dense atmosphere of resentment.

Moreover, after tens of thousands of years of evolution, that place only became increasingly strange and uncanny. It had already become its own unique realm. In fact, some sort of terrifying natural law had been born in that land.

The Dead Spirit Demonic Land had already become a daunting forbidden area of the Kingdom of the Nine States. Even cultivators were more likely to die than survive if they entered, not to mention mortal humans.

M-hm… that place was indeed terrifying. It was only natural for Da Bai to be afraid.

“Da Bai, you have me protecting you. What are you afraid of?” An Lin patted his head and chuckled. “No matter what dangers we encounter, I’ll always put your safety first and foremost!”

Da Bai’s face flushed red. “Big Brother An, you’re becoming better and better at comforting and convincing others, woof!”

An Lin smiled and remained silent. If he didn’t coax his great mount, then how would Da Bai let him ride him willingly?

The person and the dog traveled through a teleportation spell formation and arrived at the Ancient Void State. Then, the dog mount started whizzing toward the Dead Spirit Demonic Land. On the way, they encountered numerous cultivators who were flying on swords.

“Big Brother An, look! There are so many cultivators who are traveling on flying swords! They all look so snobbish! They all feel so arrogant and haughty! Woof!” Da Bai wore an expression of disdain.

An Lin smiled and explained, “You have to understand them. The Heavenly Sword Sect, one of the Kingdom of the Nine States’ four great sects, is situated in this Ancient Void State. Thus, the conduct of sword cultivators is relatively more refined here. Everyone craves to become a carefree and elegant sword immortal. It’s only normal that they’re slightly more arrogant.

“After all, if sword cultivators aren’t arrogant, how will they understand the true charm of the sword dao? The sword is a weapon of elegance and killing. It’s inherently used for showing off!”

Da Bai clapped his paws in realization. “Big Brother An, your understanding is so thorough, woof!”

At this moment, a sword cultivator who was flying by crossed his arms and puffed his chest out. There was a look of disdain and ridicule in his eyes as he glanced at the dog-riding An Lin.

This expression…

An Lin erupted in rage. “The f*ck you looking at? Are you looking down on dog-riders?”

The sword cultivator sneered and increased his speed. It was as though An Lin was not worthy of his time. A sense of haughtiness and disdain oozed from his every action.

An Lin’s expression darkened. “Da Bai…”

“Some might tolerate this, but this dog can’t!” Da Bai was equally furious. The wind rings under his feet expanded twofold, and a terrifying sonic boom erupted behind him.

Boom!

Da Bai became a streak of white as he closed in on the arrogant sword cultivator.

The sword cultivator’s expression changed drastically upon seeing this. It looked as though he had been given a fright.

However, the sword cultivator quickly regained his composure. Then, a fiery battle intent started burning in his eyes. He formed a hand seal, and his sword rang violently before starting to fly even faster!

This male cultivator was of the Soul Formation Final Stage, and his speed was not to be underestimated!

“Humph! You actually dare to challenge my speed? I’ll have you understand what true speed is! Flight mode, woof!”

Da Bai stuck his tongue out and furiously swatted his paws at the void. Moreover, his snowy-white tail started spinning like the propeller of an airplane! Bursts of air current were spat out behind him like air cannonballs.

Da Bai’s speed increased significantly!

Whoosh!

Da Bai drew closer and closer to the sword cultivator.

The sword cultivator’s expression changed drastically, and he furiously pressed his sword to go faster. However, the sword had already reached its limit, and it was unable to go any faster. Eventually, Da Bai overtook the sword cultivator and left the sword cultivator in his wake!

“Hahaha… You dared to challenge me with that useless metallic trash? Do you feel the terror of being beaten by my air-spitting dog flight mode?” Da Bai shook his hips at the sword cultivator behind him.

“Damn you!” The sword cultivator’s veins bulged in fury. Since when had he been humiliated in such a way before?

Immediately afterward, something even more humiliating occurred.

Pfff!

Da Bai suddenly farted, and a devastating airstream struck the sword cultivator’s body. The sword cultivator felt like dying.

His pride as a sword immortal instilled within him a strong tenacity and determination. However, being ridiculed, surpassed, and fed farts by a dog made him feel a burning sense of shame.

He wanted to prove himself, yet the gap between him and the dog was becoming larger and larger.

Due to his qualities of tenacity and determination, he couldn’t bring himself to give up even though he knew that catching up to Da Bai would be impossible. Thus, he could only continue to bear this strong sense of humiliation.

This was truly a feeling of despair!

“We were only provoking each other a little… That detestable dog-riding male will probably leave soon. I’ll just endure this for a little longer!”

After overtaking the sword cultivator, the distance between Da Bai and the sword cultivator had remained unchanging this entire time. It was neither far nor close, and Da Bai occasionally gifted the sword cultivator a dog fart.

Fifteen minutes later.

“Big Brother An, that lad’s perseverance is astonishing! It’s been so long, yet he still hasn’t given up, woof!” A rare expression of admiration appeared across Da Bai’s face.

An Lin glanced at the pursuing male and was also slightly astonished. He knows that catching up is impossible, so why is he still chasing after us? Is this the pride of a Sword Immortal?

“Don’t mind him. Continuing releasing your dog farts,” An Lin replied.

Da Bai cracked a grin. “Big Brother An, why does it sound like you’re scolding me[1]? Woof!”

After saying this, another fart boomed out. A stifling air current rushed toward the sword cultivator behind them…

“You’ve gone too far!” the sword cultivator roared in fury, yet he was unable to do anything.

Are they crazy? Why aren’t they leaving? Why do they persist in staying in front of me?

We’re clearly not headed for the same place!

The sword cultivator was on the verge of collapse, and he furiously cursed in his mind.

Can’t the dog in front of me take initiative and leave? That way, I can give the excuse that we’re not headed for the same place and thus stop chasing after them. That way, my dao heart won’t be wounded either…

Why are they deliberately picking on me?

Another fifteen minutes later…

There was a hint of genuine admiration in Da Bai’s voice as he turned around to speak to the sword cultivator.

“I admire the fact that you’re a tenacious man. How about you admit defeat? If you admit defeat, I’ll stop feeding you my farts. Woof!”

In reality, Da Bai had already run out of farts…

The male sword cultivator gritted his teeth in anger. “You were willing to waste your time just to humiliate me. You covered all this distance unnecessarily. Your Excellency is so broad-minded and generous!”

Da Bai was dumbfounded upon hearing this. “Are you f*cking kidding me? It was clearly you who followed after me because you were unwilling to yield. Yet you’re blaming me now? Woof!”

The male sword cultivator’s eyes bulged. “Dog sh*t!”

“Your request is so greedy!

“I’ve already given you so many farts… I’ve run out already… Woof!”

There was a look of disgust on Da Bai’s face.

Male sword cultivator: “…”

The male sword cultivator was so furious that he almost suffered from a heart attack.

However, he quickly comprehended what Da Bai had just said. “Hang on… you said that I was following you guys this entire time? Where are you two going?”

“We’re going to the Dead Spirit Demonic Land, woof!” Da Bai answered him honestly.

The male sword cultivator opened his mouth and sucked in a sharp breath. Then, he stammered, “F-f*ck me… We’re heading to the same destination!”

[1] Dog fart in Chinese is akin to bullsh*t in English. I.e. it sounds like An Lin is telling Da Bai to stop bullsh*tting.