Help! Five Beast Alphas Want To Breed Me!!(BL)

Zethar;

I stare down at the small dagger in my hands.

I designed it myself. Every little detail, and I stayed with the blacksmith, ensuring that he got every detail right.

This is my first gift to Elian’s baby. It may be a... strange gift for an infant... but I hope a part of her connects with it. It’s a dangerous world we live in, and she may have a nation to look after her, but true confidence blossoms from one’s ability to protect oneself.

I know it might be a bit too early to give Elian this gift, but I don’t want to hold on to it while I’m away.

I could stay to give it to Elian when the baby is born... but heaven knows I can not stay here for that long.

I can’t do it.

I’ve gone back and forth about this decision so many times... but at the end of the day... this is what is best for me.

Leaving Nagari... and Elian, and Zephan... and Koda.

I need to leave before anyone gives me a reason to stay.

I also need to leave now, because I know myself well enough to understand that if I linger too long... if I allow even a single moment of hesitation to root itself inside me, I might not go at all.

And that would make things worse. Much worse.

To be honest, I wasn’t even supposed to be here to begin with.

....Maybe that’s why I’ve never quite had use here. Elian doesn’t need me.

He has Zephan... and now Koda.

There’s no reason to linger around aimlessly.

I should head back home. I’ll be of use there. And thankfully, I have just been given the perfect excuse.

I pull the letter out of my pocket and take a deep breath.

I’ve already read this letter more times than necessary. I’ve read it so much that I no longer need to look at the words to remember them.

Lioran’s handwriting is unmistakable. Careful, slightly slanted, as though he had taken his time with every stroke.

Father hasn’t been well.

That’s the bottom line of the letter.

Nothing else, though. The letter isn’t exactly detailed. Nothing ever is with Lioran.

He says only what needs to be said and expects the rest to be understood.

But I know what he means. And more importantly, I know what I can make it mean.

An excuse. A reason... A way out that doesn’t sound like what it really is.

I step into the main hall, and when the doors shut, I look up... and freeze. They’ve all gathered here!!

Aunt Selthia, Zephan, Koda, and Elian.

Elian has his arms folded over his chest, and his lips are puckered into a tight pout, with an annoyed scowl as he glares at me.

No way!!

My eyes dart instantly to Zephan, whom I told just a few minutes ago that I’d be leaving tonight, and he averts his gaze.

HE RATTED ME OUT!??

Aunt Selthía, who’s standing near one of the tall windows, with her presence gracefully intense as ever, keeps her golden gaze keen on me.

Zephan is beside her, with his arms folded behind him, while Koda is leaning against one of the pillars–his posture relaxed but his attention sharp.

Elián, on the other hand, is seated. Seated, but not still, as one knee is bouncing in annoyance, I can’t mistake.

He’s annoyed, yet I can tell that something is off.

He is not standing or moving about restlessly like he usually does when he has the strength for it.

He’s seated. And I don’t know if it’s just the pregnancy or something else.

I look back at Koda, who is close enough that if Elián so much as shifts wrongly, he would notice.

Of course, he would. That’s what he’s here for.

Something in my chest tightens at the thought, but I ignore it.

...I’ve gotten rather good at ignoring things these days.

”Zethar.” Aunt Selthía speaks first. Breaking the silence and acknowledging me.

I turn back to her, and her gaze drops to the letter in my hand before returning to my face.

Goodness, there’s no point dragging this out or creating a fuss.

Since Zephan has clearly told them my plan to leave, I’d best give them a reason and be on my way.

”I received a letter from the capital,” I say without preamble, and I feel the atmosphere in the hall shift.

”A letter?” Zephan repeats, but I ignore him.

”You didn’t tell me anything about a letter.” He adds, and this time, I look at him.

He had tried to talk me out of going, telling me how much he needs me and lying that Elian and the baby do as well. I explained to him that I just missed the capital, but he wouldn’t have it.

When he left, I thought he had accepted my decision and made peace with it, but instead, he told all of them my plans to leave! So what?? They’d stop me!

I can’t believe he did that!

”I was on my way to tell you when a guard informed me that I’d been summoned to the main hall,” I reply, not bothering to hide my annoyance from him, and he straightens slightly.

I notice Koda’s shift, too, but I return my gaze to Aunt Selthia.

For this not to be a messy exit, I need her consent to leave. So right now... as much as I detest needing permission, I’m going to need hers.

If not, the real reason I’m leaving just might become obvious.

”The letter is from Lioran,” I add, and that lands exactly as expected.

Concern floods the room immediately.

”What happened?” Koda asks, stepping forward slightly, and I turn to my eldest brother.

His massive, brooding form is unarguably the largest in the room. All my life, I have respected him. More than anyone else. Even more than Father.

I think that’s another reason why I’d never think of competing with him... or being of some type of equal importance.

I look away from him as I speak.

”He says Father hasn’t been well for a while,” I reply, and silence follows.