Help! Five Beast Alphas Want To Breed Me!!(BL)

Queen Cassia;

I never thought I could be more hurt than I already was. More... broken, more hurt... more in need of retribution from this bastard I call a husband.

”How could you?!” I demand with my voice ringing sharply against the walls of the room.

My voice sounds so pained and broken, I hardly recognise it. But then again, my voice isn’t the only thing of mine that I haven’t been able to recognise of late.

Wilhelm stands in front of me, shoulders slumped, eyes lowered like a man awaiting execution.

Execution!?

No, that would be too easy. I wish I could expel him! From my life, from my past, from my heart, from my memories!!

”How could you keep that from me?” I scream again, my chest heaving as I battle to fight tears.

”How could you hide something like that... something so massive...from the woman you claim to love!?” I rage further, and he flinches, a movement that sparks another jolt of fury through me.

What is he flinching for!? After all these years together, he just dropped this truth at my feet, and he’s the one flinching!???

”All these years, Wilhelm.” I croak with my hands trembling as I press them against my chest.

”All these years I have stood beside you. Supported every decree, every campaign, every decision... no matter how difficult. No matter how many people doubted you.” I cry hopelessly as I stare at the man I love with all my heart, but now wish I didn’t.

”I was everything you needed, Wilhelm. All you had to do was ask, and I became it... A mother, a friend, a sister, a daughter, a companion, an adviser... anything you needed!!” I cry harder, and tears blur my vision as I stare at the pathetic man reeking of alcohol who’s standing in front of me.

My breath catches as the words he confessed to me just moments ago replay in my head.

”And this is what you repay me with? Secrets? Lies?” I croak as I crumble to the ground.

Feeling more hollow and empty on the inside.

”You hid the truth about a whole person... for thirty-something years!?” I whimper, and he takes a slow, unsure step towards me.

”Cassia, I didn’t hide...” He begins with a voice so hoarse, I can barely hear.

”I didn’t mean for it to happen. I didn’t even know that...” He begins, but I lose it.

”Don’t!” I snap, pointing sharply at him, and he freezes.

”Don’t you dare try to explain the ’results’ or ’reasons’ of your secret to me. You had years to tell me, Wilhelm. Years to trust me. Years to treat me as your equal!” I spit in anger, and his gaze drops to the ground in what seems to be shame.

I wipe the tears off my eyes in anger and push myself off the floor.

I take one step towards him, and fresh tears burn behind my eyes, but I refuse to let them fall... not again. Not another round of tears for this man.

”When we got married,” I begin with my voice low, shaking with betrayed conviction,

”I gave you my whole heart. I gave you my loyalty, my life, my faith. Everything I had, I put it in your hands...” I continue, and my throat tightens.

”And you used those hands... those same hands that I trusted... You used those hands to hide things from me. Something so big!! Hiding it is even just one of the offences!” I break, and Wilhelm’s mouth falls open, his voice cracks as he speaks.

”Cassia, please. I never meant to hurt you. I didn’t expect...” He begins, but I cut him off.

”You didn’t expect?” My voice rises again, shrill with disbelief and pain.

”You didn’t expect what, Wilhelm? The consequences? The pain? The outcome? What exactly did you think would happen when the truth came out? What did you think having an affair behind my back would birth!? Ease!? Something I would never find out about!?” I scream, and his silence is answer enough.

”You didn’t think at all,” I whisper as a tear slips from my eye, hot and humiliating.

”You didn’t think about me. About us. About our son. About our kingdom.” I concluded, and his breath shudders.

”Cassia, I...”

”I said DON’T,” I yell with the force of my scream, startling even me.

I turn away from him for a moment, holding on to the wall to keep myself standing. My hands tremble violently, and my breathing shudders with restrained tears.

I can still hear his secret echoing in my head. The truth he had spoken only minutes ago.

A truth so heavy, so devastating, so impossible that it feels like it has stripped the air from my lungs.

I press a hand against my stomach as I sense my feelings tangling into a suffocating knot of dread, betrayal, grief, and fury in there.

I force myself to face him again, and I stare at him, not even knowing what to do with him.

”You should leave.” I breathe, and he stiffens.

”Cassia...no, please... I promise, I didn’t know he...” He begins, but I’ve heard enough.

”Leave,” I order, with my voice cold now.

Not shouting. Not explosive.

Just... cold.

Final.

”You should not be in Gravemaw anymore. I don’t want you here. I don’t want you in this castle. I don’t want you around me. I don’t want to see you.” I speak, and I swallow the pain those words cause me.

”By this time tomorrow, I expect you back in the capital. Or anywhere you wish to go. Just... away from me.” I add, and he takes a step toward me as though he could still salvage something... anything.

”Cassia, don’t do this. Please. Let me fix this. Let me...” He begins, and I roll my eyes in exasperation.

”NO!” I scream as I hurl the nearest object... a golden ornament from my table at him.

One of the gifts I got.

It smashes against the wall inches from his shoulder, and his eyes widen.

”Don’t talk to me. Don’t explain. Don’t try to fix anything, cause you can’t!” I scream with my voice trembling.

”You can’t fix this. You can’t undo this. You can’t erase it. You hid it long enough for it to fester.” I add, and he looks broken.

Truly, utterly shattered.

For a moment, I see the man I once loved with no doubt whatsoever... my husband, my partner, my king...

He crumbles before me, guilt and regret swallowing him whole, but I look away, hardened by rage.

”Get out, Wilhelm,” I order, and

He opens his mouth, then closes it again, jaw trembling.

He bows his head in surrender, and for the first time in my life... Wilhelm looks like he truly has nowhere to stand... nowhere to go...

He moves toward the door slowly, like a prisoner walking toward his own exile.

And just before he steps out, he pauses and whispers without turning back...

”I loved you. I still do. And I never wanted this to be the cost of my mistakes.”

My heart aches so sharply, it feels like it might split open, but I clenched my fists.

I hold my ground.

”Leave,” I say again, barely above a whisper.

The door opens.

He steps out, and the door closes.

Even though I can still feel him lingering outside, the silence that follows crushes me.

All the strength I’d held onto drains from my body.

My knees buckle.

I crumble to the ground and bury my face in my hands as the sob finally breaks free.

The tears come hard... ugly, gasping, trembling sobs that tear out of me until my throat burns.

”How could you do this to me...?” I question no one in particular as my voice cracks, barely audible.

”How could you hide something like that... from me?” I add, and my fingers curl in the fabric of my dress as I cry harder.

”Wasn’t I enough?”

”Wasn’t my love enough?”

”Why didn’t you trust me?”

A storm of emotions rages through me... betrayal, heartbreak, fear.

The secret he revealed replays over and over in my mind like a curse.

I know the world outside my room is moving.

Gravemaw was in chaos. Our sons are fighting battles...internal and external.

People need their Queen...

But right now...

I am simply a woman whose heart has been torn open by the one man she had trusted with her soul.

I pull my knees to my chest, shaking as wave after wave of sobs wrack my body.

And though I know I would have to stand up again...face my people, my children, my kingdom...

for now...

I let myself break.

Because tomorrow, when Wilhelm obeys my command and leaves Gravemaw...

I don’t want to cry much... break then...

Things will change with his departure, and nothing will ever be the same again.