Gun of Ashes

Chapter 400: Chapter 51 White Church

”Chasing danger?”

Joey found the conversation becoming interesting. He looked at Hig, who appeared somewhat reserved.

His impression of this man had always been that he was a bit timid and introverted, but now hearing what he said, clearly he was more than that; those were just his surface.

”People are complex, aren’t they? The same person has multiple faces, just like Lorenzo.”

Hig often mentioned Lorenzo, as if this detective had some kind of enticing magic power.

”How so?”

There was plenty of time, and Joey had quite a bit of leisure to chat with him.

”Lorenzo never tries to hide anything. You should be able to feel it too, right? He’s utterly crazy, with a strong tendency towards self-destruction, yet he never hides the fact that he’s a madman; sometimes he even takes pride in it.”

”In some ways, he’s extremely honest. I’ve always been afraid of the conflict between him and Mrs. Van Rudd, you’re familiar with her temperament, right?”

Hearing Hig say this, Joey recalled that grumpy old lady, and he began to understand Hig’s concerns.

”Once conflict arises, it might end in bloodshed, but Lorenzo has never done anything excessive. It’s like he turns into a madman once he steps out the door, but upon crossing the threshold, he seems normal again.”

Hig reminisced about those times concerning Lorenzo.

”He’s like a withered tree...”

He softly spoke.

”An old and dying tree, from whose cracked bark you can glimpse inside, burning intensely, consuming and carbonizing everything within until death.”

”Yet even so, new green sprouts appear on the dry surface... That’s why I find Lorenzo fascinating, very intriguing. I’ve always been curious about how he became this way.”

As Hig spoke, his words carried an odd feeling, and Joey couldn’t help but feel a bit surprised.

”You should ask him yourself, aren’t you his roommate?”

”But he’s very dangerous... People like to chase danger, but likewise, they hesitate before that danger, just like... the dark side in human nature.”

Hig continued his statement, looking at the other members of the Mutual Aid Association—both men and women, young and old—everyone seemed normal and harmonious.

”Look how friendly everyone is, just like family.”

Watching them, some people had already started exchanging contact information, and some were planning to travel together next.

”Joey, can you imagine? Such a group of people nearly fell into that deadly illusion before, selling their possessions for fleeting pleasure, and some even went down a wrong path...”

The voice gradually grew sinister, and Hig wasn’t speaking empty words; such things might be happening right now in the Lower City District.

”I used to believe that human nature and even the world were dualistic, either black or white, good or evil. But the longer I stayed in Old Dunling, the more clearly I recognized my error; there’s no good or evil, just a haze of grey.”

Hig lowered his head, and rather than speaking with Joey, he seemed to be narrating to himself, examining himself.

”Everyone is a constantly changing grey, a pitiable body composed of contradictions, made of black and white. When you incline towards good, the white part is a bit more; when leaning to evil, the black part dominates a bit more. There is no absolute.”

”Contradiction runs through each person. I’m very curious about everything about Lorenzo, yet I’m too afraid to step forward.”

Hig glanced at the long-silent Joey and said somewhat helplessly.

”I usually don’t talk much.”

”I can see you’re very conflicted, wanting to communicate with people but also afraid, even using the Mutual Aid Association as a way to say these things, right?”

Joey simply analyzed Hig; everyone is conflicted, he is, Joey is, and Lorenzo is too.

”It feels good to say it.” Hig smiled, even though he had spent so long in Old Dunling, his friends were still sadly few, virtually nonexistent.

He softly murmured.

”Just like that, humans are social animals. We walk the streets and see countless of our kind, but those who can truly see into our hearts are very few, always in a state of soul loneliness.”

”What did you say?” Joey couldn’t hear him clearly.

”Nothing,” Hig said.

Suddenly, for some unknown reason, the scene became silent, even the sound of conversations diminished. Just when Joey was puzzled, a grand music began to play. The old pipe organ came alive again, with melodies pouring from its bronze-stained vents, filling every corner of the space in an instant.

The melody was urgent and brief, ending just when you realized you wanted to listen closely. Then a man slowly walked over, smiling, and waved to everyone.

”It seems like everyone’s mental state is quite good. I hope you all soon end these sufferings,” the man said.

His status appeared to be very esteemed; applause and whistles were incessant, and some people even went up to give him a big hug.

”Who is he?” Joey was somewhat puzzled; he had never seen such a person in the Mutual Aid Association.

”A psychologist,” Hig explained to him.

This Mutual Aid Association wasn’t an ordinary one. After all, everyone wasn’t trying to quit cigarettes or alcohol, but that dangerous hallucinogen. A vast amount of information shows that some people become insane after forcibly quitting the hallucinogen, so their psychological states need constant attention.

The man was the newly appointed psychologist, and he would provide free psychological counseling for everyone in the Mutual Aid Association.

”I remember there wasn’t such a position before,” Joey said.

”I don’t know either. Anyway, he came with a document; it’s said he’s a doctor from Black Mountain Hospital. Initially, people were a bit scared, but later it was fine. He became quite well-liked, so it didn’t matter,” Hig replied.

Hig always felt that the self-statements in the Mutual Aid Association were more like self-narratives of the spirit, opening up all defenses and revealing one’s essence, and it felt unnerving when facing strangers, like exposing oneself mentally to others.

The doctor wasn’t very old, looking like he wasn’t even thirty, wearing a standard smile that was just right, neither stiff nor pretentious.

Black Mountain Hospital?

Joey surely knew what kind of place Black Mountain Hospital was, but it wasn’t entirely filled with people associated with demons. To a certain extent, most of the doctors were normal people; it’s just that they didn’t realize their research projects were related to demons.

He was a very likable guy, but for some reason, this was Joey’s first time seeing him, yet he instinctively resisted him, as if subconsciously deeming him unfriendly.

The man was greeting people one after another, and in the blink of an eye, he had already greeted half of them, soon reaching Joey.

Joey didn’t want to engage in meaningless chatter. Glancing at the time, it was about time for him to leave.

”Hig, actually, Lorenzo isn’t so dangerous, but...” Joey paused, hesitated, then still warned Hig, ”But don’t get too close to Lorenzo; it’s really dangerous, in the literal sense.”

From Hig having been roommates with Lorenzo for so long without incident, it showed they didn’t have much interaction. Otherwise, this unlucky roommate would have long been engulfed by darkness, killed by suddenly appearing demons one night. Lorenzo seemed indifferent, but in reality, he was protecting these unlucky people.

”What about you? Joey, are you just as dangerous?” Hig asked.

Joey’s movement to leave paused for a moment. After a brief silence, he replied.

”Almost, sorry, I can only be a friend for a while,” he said sincerely, then quickly left as if avoiding something.

This was the price of joining the Purification Mechanism, or rather, the price of knowing that dark entity. Joey seemed normal, but like Lorenzo, he no longer had a normal life.

Of course, there were some advantages. For example, if Joey disliked someone, he could spend more time with them, grab a meal or go shopping, and before long, that bloke might get a demon knocking at their door.

He quickly walked out. According to the time, he should be back to work, although he hadn’t been out long, he hoped nothing would go wrong.

The situation across Old Dunling had become increasingly severe. Because of this reason, Joey felt exhausted, unable to bear it anymore, so he came to the Mutual Aid Association to relax a bit. Interaction with others did ease the heart, but suddenly his pace stopped as if something supernatural made him turn his head.

Joey stood at the street corner, looking at the place he had just left—a tall building with white brick walls, marked with countless scars by time. New sprouts grew in the cracks, all of which told its age.

He clearly remembered that the Mutual Aid Association wasn’t here before, but in a small house between buildings. Yet when he came today, he was informed they had moved here. Joey always had a weird feeling, yet couldn’t articulate it.

Joey remembered this place; its name was Saint Mary’s Cathedral. But with the decline of the Evangelical Church and the loss of faith, that name was no longer mentioned, and few visited here. It was so grand, yet seemingly deliberately forgotten.

As time passed, more people forgot its name, crudely calling it the White Church based on its appearance alone.

Time was running out; Joey suppressed that strange feeling, assuring himself it was normal. After all, anyone battling demons would have some mental issues. Without looking back, he left. As he departed, a humming voice sounded again, as if someone was singing loudly within from behind the white wall.

The melody soared, reaching the highest point before crashing down.