Genshin Impact: Spoiling the Future

[Paimon, striking a ’great detective’ pose: ”I’ve figured it out. Itto can’t outtalk Yelan or outargue Kuki Shinobu. He’s totally at a disadvantage here...”]

[Traveler nods: ”Itto and Kuki Shinobu are like you and me.”]

At this, the Paimon in reality syncs up with the Paimon in the story, stomping her foot and exclaiming, ”Ugh, that makes me so mad! Don’t compare me to Itto!”

Lumine, with her high emotional intelligence, responds, ”Doesn’t that mean you’re the boss?”

”Huh? Is that what it means? Ehehe, well, that’s kind of embarrassing.” Paimon blushes, then continues reading with Lumine.

Furina inwardly grumbles, ’Is she really that easy to please?’

Little does she know, she’s just as easy to coax—Lucian only needs to offer her a dessert to win her over.

Hu Tao muses, ”So, does that mean me and Little Lucian are like Kuki Shinobu and Itto?”

”By general reasoning, indeed, you’re the Itto,” Lucian nods.

”That makes sense! This Hall Director’s got red eyes too! Plus, I’m always dealing with ghosts, so how am I not an Oni? Hahaha!” True to form, Hu Tao isn’t the least bit upset.

Arataki Itto glances left and right, confused. What’s that supposed to mean? Am I an adjective now? Why’s everyone using me as a reference?

[Arataki Itto points at ☞ Paimon: ”Hey, hey, what’s that supposed to mean? You picking a fight or what?!”]

Itto might not be able to beat Yelan, but he’s definitely confident he could take Paimon.

[Paimon: ”I-I’m just telling the truth! Everyone knows you’re a blockhead!”]

Surprisingly, timid Paimon dares to talk back, showing how comfortable she’s become with Itto after getting to know him. Back when they weren’t close, a single glare from Itto would’ve had her cowering. Now, she knows that despite his hotheaded appearance, Itto’s a good-natured Oni who wouldn’t actually hurt her.

[Itto: ”I’m a blockhead? Then you’re a Flying Lavender Melon!”]

[Paimon: ”Flying Lavender Melon?! Ugh, you’re making me so mad… I’m gonna give you an ugly nickname… How about Bull Chucker! Hmph, Bull Chucker, feeling cocky, huh?”]

Clearly, Paimon’s not scared of Itto anymore—she’s getting bold.

In the story, Yanfei listens to their bickering with exasperation, walking past them to discuss the situation with Yelan.

In reality, Venti chuckles, Bull Chucker, haha, that pairs well with my ’ballad-singer’ vibe. So what’s old man Zhongli? A mora-printer? No, wait, mora isn’t printed anymore. He’s probably a ’freeloader’ now. Venti wouldn’t dare say this nickname to Zhongli’s face, though, or next time they drink, he’d be stuck without even a square cup.

He’s already annoyed that Zhongli limits his drinking with those square cups, and Zhongli finds him just as much of a headache. Look at this group—Hu Tao, Guizhong, Venti—the three people who give Zhongli the biggest migraines, all gathered together. No wonder Zhongli prefers to listen to stories outside.

Back to the story: Lucian drew an illustration. In the foreground, Yelan and Yanfei discuss the situation, while in the background, Itto and Paimon are still squabbling. Next to the two ’kids,’ their guardians (Lumine and Kuki Shinobu) exchange glances before turning their attention to the ’adult group.’

[Yelan: ”Everyone, sorry to interrupt your lively chat, but there’s something you might need to know.”]

”If this counts as lively, then it’s chattier than Xianyun,” Guizhong chuckles lightly.

Xianyun: ”?”

Has this Adeptus become an adjective now?

What Yelan mentions is a reminder for everyone to keep things confidential. After speaking, she heads off alone to find a way out—truly a reliable adult.

After Yelan finishes, it’s the second ’adult,’ Yanfei, who speaks up.

[Yanfei: ”I came to the Chasm to retrieve the Fantastic Compass mentioned in a will.”]

She explains to the group that her client entrusted the Fantastic Compass to an ambitious individual who brought it to the Chasm, only to disappear afterward.

[Itto, reluctantly: ”Since my benefactor says so… fine, I’ll give her this favor. From now on, we’re all comrades.”]

[Then, with a grudging tone: ”As for that smug jerk… hmph, I’ll count them in too.”]

In truth, he was just waiting for an excuse to back down gracefully. As for the ’smug jerk,’ Yanfei can’t reveal their identity, only saying that in a place like this, finding a way out is a job tailor-made for them—they were born for it.

[Itto, puzzled: ”What kind of job has you working in a godforsaken place like this?”]

[Paimon, jumping in: ”I know this one! Adventurer!”]

[Traveler: ”?”]

The Traveler thinks, I’m just watching the show, why’d you splash damage onto me?

It’s not just the Traveler who’s confused—every adventurer in Teyvat feels like they’ve been stabbed in the heart. What’s worse is they want to argue back but can’t. Paimon’s right—adventurers do work in godforsaken places. And because she’s right, it stings even more!

Lies don’t hurt; the truth is the sharpest blade!

[Paimon: ”What’s with that look? I didn’t say anything wrong. Aren’t you and I like that?”]

[Traveler retorts: ”The adventurer is me, not Paimon.”]

Right, readers might recall that Paimon is the emergency food—her job is to fatten up! But Paimon doesn’t seem to gain much weight. From an emergency food perspective, she’s failing.

Turning the page, a sudden illustration appears—a close-up of Itto, winking with one eye closed, saying:

[”Traveler, you’re Paimon’s boss. A boss needs to have magnanimity and let their little buddy bask in the glory.”]

The image is oddly charming, making Itto’s words feel playful. Indeed, illustrations like this add the perfect flair.

[Kuki Shinobu: ”Paimon, just listen to the boss’s words, but don’t take them to heart, okay?”]

[Paimon, crossing her arms: ”Hmph, for Shinobu’s sake… fine.”]

She says it’s for Shinobu’s sake, but the two of them have only just met.

[Itto, exasperated: ”I… ugh, I’m the boss, I’ll let you guys have this one.”]

Itto’s right, but readers love his earlier line: ’A person lives for pride, and I just hate backing down.’ The boomerang came back fast, and readers can’t stop laughing.

With these two clowns, this story should be lighthearted and fun, right? Let’s not focus on the unreliable ones for now—Yelan, the reliable one, is already investigating the surroundings. Kuki Shinobu, equally dependable, has brought out food and water to secure their supplies.

[Paimon: ”This is great! Bull Chucker, you may not be the sharpest, but your subordinate is so capable and reliable!”]

[Itto, instinctively agreeing at first, chuckles: ”Hehe, I think so too…”]

Then, catching himself: ”Wait, no! This boss is plenty smart too!”]

Readers are shocked—he actually caught on? Oh no, is he actually getting smarter? Itto, you’re making us feel like we don’t know you anymore.