Destiny in Cinders

I want to stay in Grand Chen. That was what Cang Linzu truly wanted. An Jing could clearly sense his thoughts through the resonance of his lifestar.

Cang Linzu had always been quite sharp and insightful, losing only to An Jing and Bai Qinghan. He was once a student of a martial academy at the northern frontier. Even though he dropped out for various reasons, it was still a regret that gnawed at his heart.

Can I really not measure up to the others at the academy? If I had stayed there, would my family members have enjoyed its protection? Would my mother have survived? Would my father have gotten hurt? Would Uncle and the others have not gotten lost in the snowy forests? Is the problem me, or Grand Chen?

Though his thoughts were filled with questions, he had known the answer long ago. The problem is Grand Chen. He wanted to stay in Grand Chen, not to join it, but to observe from the sidelines. He wanted to understand how the people of a country of laws and protocols would neglect to enforce them and twist the country’s foundations so badly until it ruined his baseline for survival.

Joining the expeditionary force at the northern frontier was a great career path. It was relatively independent from the rest of Grand Chen and offered many avenues for promotion. Gu Yunzhi was a capable, ambitious old man who was also a bit of a gambler. There was always the chance that following him would result in a bad outcome, but stagnation was never an option.

”Boss, I know that you hate Grand Chen. I hate it too. The difference between you and me is that you’re someone who can’t tolerate the tainted in your presence, but I don’t mind. When we talked about our hometowns once, you asked how the once prosperous Grand Chen ended up in this situation. Just years prior, even the simplest of households in a random village could afford to serve meat on the table from time to time or afford new clothes. How did that peaceful state of affairs suddenly flip so rapidly to the point that we had to chew on grass to survive? I had my doubts too.

”You would think so deeply about these matters that it seemed like you came to an answer long ago. It was as if you could clearly see what led Grand Chen to this point. However, I’m not there yet. I have to find this out for myself. But now, I’m not on my own anymore. I’m the leader of our fellow brothers and sisters. If I choose to stay in Grand Chen, some of them will stay with me.

”I have no problem committing myself to this choice. But what I don’t dare to do is to... I’m not afraid of dying, not in the least... I’m only afraid of... afraid of bearing the weight of the lives of others. What should I do, Senior Disciple? If you had asked me and Yeqi to wait for you at the Brightmirror Sect, I would not hesitate in the slightest. Even though I’ll still have my regrets, it’s a burden off my shoulders at the very least. I don’t think that’s a bad choice at all. But if you ask me to do what I want, then I will grit my teeth and bear the burden of those that choose to stay with me.”

An Jing gradually opened his eyes. They glowed slightly with a hint of emotional agitation. ”To think that you’ve finally reached this point, Cang. You’ve finally found your life’s purpose, the path you want to tread. You’ve grown so fast.”

Even though he had only heard a few short conversations and seen short flashes of memory, An Jing got a good summary of the situation of the other disaster children.

After Cang Linzu awakened his lifearc, he joined Gu Yeqi’s grandfather, Gu Yunzhi, and carried out his orders at the northern frontier. This old man was rather famous in the divine capital. The mandated general greatly admired Cang Linzu for his boldness. He had proven to be a fearless scout on the battlefield and a promising young candidate to keep and nurture.

Cang Linzu was rather moved by that offer. A life in the military was something this martial academy dropout had always desired. If he followed that path, perhaps he would come to learn why the defenders of the northern frontier crumbled the moment the northern barbarians began their invasion and the failed disaster management of the snow calamity. The whole situation bordered on outright abandonment.

Gu Yeqi, on the other hand, was the sole living member of her generation of the Gu clan’s bloodline. It wouldn’t be safe for her to remain in Grand Chen. Gu Yunzhi intended to send her to the five Dustdawn Sects before his enemies could discover her. Initially, it was planned that she would join the strongest of those sects, the Grandnight Sect. But An Jing’s actions and status as a disciple of the Brightmirror Sect gave Gu Yeqi the option of joining that sect as well.

Gu Yunzhi was even easier to deal with. In fact, he was also incredibly interested in An Jing and would be a contact at the northern frontier that An Jing could leverage. With his help, An Jing would have a much easier time finding his mother and getting her settled safe and sound.

No doubt, Gu Yunzhi wanted to raise the other disaster children on his own as well. They were filled with potential, having been filtered out by the demonic cult. It was worth the gamble to take them in to see whether one or two more would awaken lifearcs.

In the same vein, some of them would follow Gu Yeqi if she chose to join the Brightmirror Sect, which would cause the disaster children to split up. Would they stay with Cang Linzu to join Grand Chen’s forces or follow Gu Yeqi to the Brightmirror Sect?

An Jing believed that more of them would go to the Brightmirror Sect, since that was where he belonged. There would also be some who stayed in Grand Chen. While they did respect An Jing a great deal, it was still a gamble on how they’d be treated at the Brightmirror Sect. It was a safer bet to join the army that treated them well and continue to grow and rise through the ranks.

Cang Linzu’s considerations stretched even further into the future. However, the current role he played made it difficult for him to make up his mind.

”Do what you want,” An Jing answered calmly. ”If your decision affects the lives of others, so be it. Cang, wanting to stay in Grand Chen is not a bad thing. In fact, if all of us stay together in one spot, it’d be much easier for us to be wiped out all at once.

”If you stay in Grand Chen and become a trusted confidant of General Gu, you’ll be able to create a place for our other siblings to return to if things don’t work out for them at the Brightmirror Sect. But there are also benefits if you join them at the sect. You’d be able to leverage each other’s help to do things that you would have trouble executing on your own. Take for instance the ambush on me and my master by the other Dustdawn Sects. Only a fool would carry out such a thing themselves, so they do it through proxies. On the flip side, if we’re not in the same camp, we can solve each other’s problems from within our respective factions.

”All that’s to say you should follow your heart. We are already connected by our lifestars, so it doesn’t matter where we are. As for bearing the lives of others, Cang, don’t forget that we’re martialists at the end of the day. We possess the kind of power that can end lives in a single punch. The burden was already ours to bear the moment we gained power like this. Trust yourself. I’ll see you at the northern frontier if we’re fated to meet.”

The connection weakened quite a bit, so An Jing cut it short himself after saying what he wanted. He laughed heartily and continued to ride east into the blizzard.

***

Cang Linzu gradually opened his eyes at the army camp; they were no longer muddled. Gu Yeqi, who was watching the entrance, turned around and waited for him to speak.

”He told me to do what I want,” he said, looking up. ”I want to stay in Grand Chen.”

”And that’s all you had to say all along.” Gu Yeqi chuckled. ”I already told you that this is no big deal. We already sold our lives once and chose to betray the demonic cult with Senior Disciple. Why would people like us hesitate over a decision like this? Rather than waste time doing so, you should be more worried about how awkward it’d be for you if most of the others don’t choose to stay here with you. Just make sure to stay safe and don’t die on the battlefield. Cleaning your grave will be a pain...”

Cang Linzu humphed and said, ”Hey, watch what you’re saying! You should be worried about yourself. If you go to the Brightmirror Sect before Senior Disciple does, you’d have to find your footing all on your own! I heard that the internal conflict in the Brightmirror Sect is quite intense. You should watch your back and not get kicked out before Senior Disciple returns. Don’t come back crying for your grandpa!”

”Hah! Just you wish!” Gu Yeqi had grown accustomed to Cang Linzu using banter as a way of showing concern. As for the Brightmirror Sect’s internal conflict, she wasn’t fearful of it in the least. The descendant of the Gu clan narrowed her eyes; they flashed and appeared reptilian for the slightest moment. ”There’s a saying of my grandfather that I’m particularly fond of. ’The good die by their deeds, the vile win by their schemes.’ If circumstances allow, I’d like to stay as one of the good. But if need be... Well, all I’ll say is that we used to be members of the demonic cult. Don’t you agree?”

They looked deeply into each other’s eyes. It was as if they were looking into a mirror, seeing every trace of anxiety, fear and yearning in each other... as well as a hint of confidence.

Whether they would stay in Grand Chen or head to the Brightmirror Sect, they were at the precipice of making a choice that would change their lives forever. There was no way young boys and girls like them wouldn’t feel nervous while making such a choice. However, they broke into smiles.

”Are you sure you can do it?”

”Of course.”

Filled with youthful vigor, optimism and camaraderie, this was how youth should be, smiling in the face of adversity. Overthinking every step of the way, timidly assessing pros and cons and only wanting to win without being willing to risk losing weren’t hallmarks of youth, at least not those youths who had survived to this day.

During the first spring of the Yanping Era, the exalted dragon engaged their son in combat at North Ocean, the Irondawn Tribes breached the city of Cloudmidst in seven days, the flame phoenix crossed the firmament and reignited the sacred fire of the Kingdom of Lingering Light’s celestial torch, and the toll of the bell of judgment resounded across the land.

That very same spring, divine-arc bearer An Jing slayed Clearing Realm adepts at Keensight and embarked on a journey to the northern frontier to look for his mother. He had grasped his lifearc and overcome many tribulations. Though the snow calamity raged on, covering the land in endless, silver frost, he could face it, brave it, and conquer it.

Frostwhite Dart traced a straight trajectory across the snow-covered land. The youth would return to his war-torn home. This time, he would triumph, triumph over all and leave no trail of lingering regrets.