Data-Driven Daoist

Instead of going directly into the palace, Yu Han walked to the other end of the flagstone courtyard. Fallen leaves crunched under his feet, and soon he stood before two shrines.

One depicted a tiger.

The other a tortoise ... Huh?

It was a fish. With wings?

Yu Han stepped closer. The ”shell” was actually two pairs of massive wings folded tight against the creature’s back. Their edges overlapped, creating a smooth, rounded dome that mimicked a carapace. Beneath this cover, the thick pectoral fins were pressed into the stone, forming the heavy, wrinkled legs of a tortoise. Even the wide tail had been tucked away, its edges hidden under the curve of the wings.

This was a sculpture of a winged fish that had been forced into the shape of a grounded reptile.

Yu Han leaned in, his shadow stretched against the stone.

Yup, not a tortoise.

He turned to the second shrine. It wasn’t a fish in disguise, and it wasn’t a calico. It was a tiger carved from blocks of white stone. It crouched low with its shoulders bunched, ready to pounce. The surface was polished smooth and radiated a chill into the morning air. There were no obvious hidden details—no wings, no double-tails. It was a literal, solid depiction of a—

Wait a minute ...

The proportions were wrong.

The tail wasn’t long and whip-like. It was thick and bushy, tucked tight against the haunches. Its ears were sharp and triangular, standing straight up rather than rounded. Even the stripes were narrow ridges of coarse fur carved into the stone.

This wasn’t a tiger.

“It’s a fat wolf!”

“Rude!” Huang Niuniu said. “Don’t be so disrespectful. It’s not fat, it’s big-stoned.”

“It’s a husky wearing a tiger costume. It’s a wolf in a cat’s clothes.”

Yu Han stepped back, glancing between the fish-tortoise and the wolf-tiger.

Huang Niuniu lit incense in front of both shrines and clapped, muttering a prayer taught to her by her grandmother.

Yu Han closed his eyes and clapped too, though he didn’t pray. His mind drifted back to the twelve beasts from the ritual hall pagoda.

The fish had been on the first layer, the wolf on the second.

There hadn’t been a tortoise nor a tiger.

They entered the Heavenly Friendship Palace through the heavy wooden doors. The massive main hall greeted them.

“W-Who do we talk to?” Huang Niuniu tugged Yu Han’s sleeves.

This girl was usually haughty when she was with friends. If she was dealing with other ladies, she could have her way with them using her motherly persona.

But in crowds of strangers?

“Niu’er, you need to grow a spine,” Yu Han said.

“I-I’m fine without one. Senior Feral Spot is doing well.”

“Let’s see if the senior brother who helped me and Fei Rui last time is on duty today.”

The girl nodded repeatedly.

They found him in the same place, manning one of the tables on the east side of the hall.

Same droopy eyes, the same sleepy demeanour of someone who wanted to be anywhere but here. He drawled to the old woman and an equally old parrot.

“Nuts, fruit. Nuts and fruit, or, nuts OR fruit?” the parrot asked.

“Just pick the fruits.” The senior exhaled. “They’re quieter to chew, and frankly, easier to find.”

“Boring! Dry! Like your soul!” the parrot shrieked. They went back and forth, and by the end of it, the senior was blinking slowly, his gaze drifting toward the ceiling as if hoping it might collapse and end the conversation.

The old woman left with a smile though, so maybe the senior brother did his job well.

“Next,” the senior brother called out. There was a queue here; three parties stood in front of Yu Han and Huang Niuniu.

Other tables had freed up, but they decided to wait.

The senior brother was exhausted but he did his job efficiently. Soon enough, it was their turn.

“Greetings, senior brother...” Yu Han clasped his fists. Huang Niuniu did the same.

“Wang,” Senior Wang said. “Wang Yunxiao. What are you here for?”

“S-Senior Feral Spot of the Gorge-Crawling Earthworm tribe told us to come here,” Huang Niuniu mustered the courage to reply. “He has something for me.”

“... fine.” Wang Yunxiao got up and headed through one of the doors on the east wall.

“The Gorge-Crawling Earthworm tribe?” A voice reached Yu Han. “What’s that?”

Just as they overheard other people’s conversations, others overheard theirs. Niu’er’s words had sparked small mutterings among the disciples waiting in line nearby.

This story is posted elsewhere by the author. Help them out by reading the authentic version.

“It’s one of the spirit beast tribes,” a disciple replied. “Unlike the Blizzard-Eyed Aquatic Monkeys and Dawn Mist Cranes, they kinda keep to themselves though. Like the Tide-Wing Tyrants.”

“That’s not true,” another disciple cut in. “They’re friendly with the alchemists, this here palace, and the Liangs. You’ll see them pop up near the cesspools too.”

“Those two are lucky if they got a gift from one of the tribes,” someone said. “They’ve been in the sunken mountains even before the clans, right?”

“Aren’t they just spirit beasts?”

“That ain’t so, young’un. Sect Master be blessed, my Little Green here’ll be a disciple like me next month. But the tribes have always had that going for them.”

“Little Green is such a ... sad name.”

“W-What’s that mean, bastard!?”

“Calm down, brother. Do you know how many ‘Little Greens’ there are? Any spirit beast who’s cute and green gets named that---”

“Well he is cute and green---”

The conversation moved on to other topics.

Tide-Wing Tyrants ... so there was a fish tribe? Or a bird tribe? It clicked. Fish-Bird. The statue?

Wang Yunxiao returned with a box.

“Next time, go to one of the private rooms for this,” he said. “Too many ears here. I took the liberty of writing down the instructions.”

He passed the wooden box over. It bore beautiful swirling patterns and the logos of the Heavenly Friendship Palace and the Stormy Reef Sect.

“Touch your disciple token to this character when you want to open it,” Wang Yunxiao said, pointing at an array.

The array likely served as the lock.

Huang Niuniu nodded. “Thanks, Senior Wang!”

“There’s too many Wangs,” Wang Yunxiao said. “I insist. Call me Senior Wang Yunxiao or Senior Yunxiao. You’re the kid with the crab that came in last time, right?”

“That’s correct,” Yu Han said. “Senior Yunxiao has a great memory.”

“I’m sure you have heard,” Wang Yunxiao said. “Bring him over next month. We’ll register him as an outer sect disciple. Won’t be a rookie though. And don’t come on the first day. The palace will be clogged with people in a hurry. Come a week later and you won’t have to waste so much time.”

“I’ll keep your advice in mind,” Yu Han said.

Huang Niuniu hugged the box to her chest. It wasn’t huge, but neither was it small enough to hide under her sleeves. She could’ve put it in the storage pouch or ring, but there were too many eyes around.

Like Wang Yunxiao said, a private room would’ve been better.

“Anything else?” the senior asked. He rapped the table slowly with a finger.

Yu Han studied the man. Wang Yunxiao was undeniably handsome. Messy black hair, a sharp jawline, and a high, straight bridge to his nose. The effect was undercut slightly by the heavy, dark bags beneath his greenish-grey eyes. He had the face of a high-ranking young master, but the soul of a middle-aged man who hadn’t slept since the previous era. Even his posture was slumped, as if his own good looks were just another weight he was tired of carrying.

He wore an armband similar to those the law enforcers carried. In yellow strokes, it read “One Heart, All Beings.” He had a token too, with the characters for Heavenly Friendship Palace written in orange strokes.

An inner disciple in the qi gathering realm. If he was an outer sect disciple, he would have a token with orange strokes to depict his cultivation realm, but the characters would simply be that of Stormy Reef.

Now that I think about it, Elder Chang’s token had yellow strokes, similar to Shu Boyan’s. But the shape was different.

For disciples, it was rectangular. Taller than it was wide, like a small, two-finger-sized bookmark. This was the case for his rookie token and the Night Alchemists’ Yard token.

Elder Chang’s token was circular, like a coin.

The membership token for the Sea of Gold Chamber of Commerce was hexagonal, like a spirit stone.

“There’s one matter,” Huang Niuniu said. “If all spirit beasts receive disciple status, can we form a courtyard of only spirit beasts?”

“I don’t know why you would want to, but you can,” Wang Yunxiao replied. “It’s an interesting question. They might pop up soon enough. The tribes might try it out, as would unaccorded spirit beasts.”

“So even spirit beasts without an accord can become a disciple?” Huang Niuniu followed up with a second question.

“All that live in the Sunken Mountains will be given an invitation,” Wang Yunxiao said. “They’ll receive the same benefits and bear the same responsibilities. From next year’s tournaments, they’ll even have their own events.”

“What if they reject?” Huang Niuniu asked.

“Why would they?” Wang Yunxiao countered.

“I don’t know ... people are different?” Huang Niuniu replied, her voice uncertain. “Spirit beasts are people too!”

“They are different,” Wang Yunxiao said. For the first time in the conversation, his eyes sparked with a hint of interest.

Yu Han did not feel jealous.

“They are people,” Yunxiao repeated. “That’s true. They might reject. I don’t know what the sect plans in that case. The matter of sending out invitations is handled mostly by the tribes, though us Heavenly Friendship Palace disciples are in no way slacking.”

As he said the last words, Wang Yunxiao’s lifespan seemed to visibly shorten.

“That’s all I have to ask,” Huang Niuniu said. Her voice had three more levels of cheerfulness compared to when she first started talking. “Senior Wang Yunxiao is kind and knowledgeable. Thank you for answering my foolish questions.”

“There aren’t any foolish questions.” Wang Yunxiao chuckled faintly.

“Aren’t there though?” Huang Niuniu giggled.

“Some would make me believe,” Wang Yunxiao replied. A pleased smile hung on his face.

They vacated the table.

Was she ... flirting? A heavy grip squeezed Yu Han’s heart.

When they left the palace and crossed the courtyard, Huang Niuniu turned to him excitedly and jumped like a kid. “How was it? How’d I do?”

“Do what?” Yu Han’s tone was flat.

“My buttering-up skills!” Huang Niuniu said, puffing out her breasts. “You always do it with senior disciples who aren’t Feral Spot. Li Yao called it ass-kissing? I wanted to try it. Get out of my comfort zone. Do you think I did well?”

Yu Han was speechless. He shakily gave her a thumbs-up.

Don’t do that again! Yu Han wished he had a thick sweater. “You know, you should leave the ass-kissing to me. It’s my duty as the future courtyard leader—”

“Oh my heavens.” Huang Niuniu took his hands. “You’re jealous.”

“I am not—”

“Jealous. My Han’er. Is so adorable—”

“I said I’m not jealous.”

“S-Should I not ... talk to men?” Huang Niuniu asked. There was something in her voice. Something submissive.

It pissed Yu Han off even more than when she flirted—no, buttered up Wang Yunxiao.

“That’s not for me to decide,” Yu Han said, his conviction unshakeable. “I trust you, and I know your interactions with others will never hold the same emotional depth as our connection. If you want to make friends, make friends. If you want to network and connect with others, it isn’t my place to stop you.”

“S-So you won’t feel jealous?”

“It’s not jealousy!” Yu Han said. He wasn’t being defensive. Perhaps only a little bit. No, it was insecurity and he would have to learn to live with it. “As long as we maintain proper boundaries with others ... there’s no issues. We shouldn’t set false expectations either. Buttering up is one thing, but leading someone on is another.”

“Han’er, are you leading me on?” Huang Niuniu came closer and whispered. “How long will it take you? Senior Wen is a stupid dummy but maybe we should take his advice sooner rather than later?”

I knew it. Yu Han sighed. Wen Liujie’s words were eating her.

“Do you know of kintsugi?” Yu Han asked.

“What’s that?” A hint of excitement laced her voice.

“An art of turning broken pots into treasures,” Yu Han said. “I’ll teach it to you. We’ll have to find gold though.”

“Broken pots ... into treasures?” Huang Niuniu’s excitement vanished. Her face paled as she looked at her hands, then quickly away. “I’m not a broken pot! I-I—Brother Chu Fei and I w-weren’t, no, I mean we didn’t ... it wasn’t like that! He’s a prince and I’m less than a concubine so I could never be the official wife and there was Linxue and I didn’t have many options—” She stopped, her breath hitching. Was she trying to shield herself with excuses? Her eyes were glassy. Was that guilt? Why did she look like she was about to lose everything?

Yu Han had seen her like this once before. After Qiao Jinhai had brutalised her.

Her breathing quickened. She was hyperventilating.

“That’s not what I meant.” Yu Han had a headache coming. He had no issues if Huang Niuniu had a previous boyfriend. Heck, Johan had only fallen in love once but had slept around with more girls than he could name. “Calm down. Sit. Okay, deep breaths. It’s going to be okay. I’m here. I’m not leaving.”