Chaotic Craftsman Worships The Cube

“So, yet another day of making friends, was it?” Myriad asked in naked sarcasm when Ben arrived in his realm. “Just going out to show how lucky the world and everyone in it is that you live here?”

“You act like I went looking for problems. I didn’t start a fight, I just finished it.”

“Which in turn can create plenty of different problems, you do realize that, don’t you?”

“Sure, but what was I supposed to do? I wasn’t just going to let them stick around to force their beliefs on me.”

“You have me! You were supposed to come tell me and then I would have sorted it out!”

“Sure, yeah, but that would have been boring.”

“Boring-”

“Plus,” Ben went on before his god could get too upset. “Neither the existence of my skill nor my desire to get paid breaks any laws, promising to harass me into following their beliefs does. I tell you and then what? Their gods tell them to stop and that’s it? The same gods that basically drove them to it by complaining about me to their believers? That’s not even a slap on the wrist.”

“And all of the photos lying around the magic towers that seemed to have appeared after we noticed what was happening up here?”

“Photos? No clue what you’re talking about,” Ben lied, his god not believing him for a second. “Anyway, what happened up here as a result?”

“Ugh, what happened is you got lucky. Since they were in the wrong, as unhappy as some were with the way you chose to handle things, it was decided that they actually needed to face some punishment since it would set a bad precedent for other faiths to gang up on one to try and make them conform to their beliefs beyond the scope of the law. You won’t have to go back tomorrow, since it was non-violent, they’ll be doing a couple weeks each of community service and have been told not to contact you again.”

“Wait, genuinely? Man, gonna be honest, I was expecting I was actually going to have to either throw up a fuss or get my own revenge by breaking their legs or something.”

“Psycho.”

“Hey, considering how little happened with Olensia’s oracle, can you blame me?”

“Having him put to death would have been infinitely more complicated for everyone than giving these ones some community service.”

“Sure, but that last asshole decided to have me and Sachel straight up killed.”

“No, he was just trying to drastically increase your odds of dying.”

“That’s not better!”

“Well, if you’re not satisfied then at least wait for after the war’s done to get your revenge,” Myriad sighed, saying it offhand without much thought and regretting it the instant he did as Ben perked up. “Wait, no. That’s not what I meant!”

“Too late, I officially have divine approval to kill that guy! Oh, I’m so fucking excited. Now that’s what I call some extra motivation to survive all of this.”

“Don’t use that as motivation and no murders!”

“That prick tried to kill me, fair is fair.”

“Have you never heard of a little thing called forgiveness?”

“Yeah, and it applies to people who, once again, haven’t tried to get me killed! I’ll have you know that I’m perfectly capable of forgiving the idiots who’d come to bother me today now that I know they’re actually being punished for it. It’s when this sort of stuff gets brushed off for the gods’ convenience that loses any chance of peace.”

“Ugh, empty skies, please no murders. You can even go and ruin his life in some other way if you really want to, just don’t kill the guy.”

“Deal.”

“...I don’t like how fast you agreed to that.”

“No take-backsies, I’ve already started planning. I think the best choice would be to convert all of Olensia’s believers away to leave his church destitute so his oracle can’t get paid and well, if that doesn’t seem like enough, I’ll go from there.”

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“Atheism or me?”

“You first, atheism for the rest.”

“That works,” Myriad nodded, having few qualms about it if the goal was to get him more believers and not draw any blood in the process. “But are you really only motivated to get me believers when it’s for revenge?”

“I mean, I slap your name on everything.”

“That’s basically passive.”

“Work smarter, not harder, right?”

“I’d prefer you do both.”

“I’m pretty comfortable saying I get you more faith than Sachel and Valaria combined, if you’re not satisfied it’s really them you should be complaining to.”

“They’re both good people who try their best for me, I could never.”

“Feel like there was a hurtful implication or two in there.”

“I’m pretty sure you’ve specifically said before that at most, you try your okayest.”

“Yeah, and look at just how good that is.”

“Ugh, you’re impossible.”

“I’m sweet like candy. Now, was there anything else I need to be worried about? Any more jerks going to come bother me because of my innocent little awakening?”

“You know, even if I’m on your side, being named an evil god really is a bad look.”

“So not the point.”

“No, there’s nothing,” Myriad sighed. “At least nothing bad. There was something I wanted to talk to you about on a related note though.”

“Okay, hit me.”

“It’s clear that even without either of our intervention, word’s going to spread about your awakening and seeing as that’s the case, I wanted to see how you’d feel about properly announcing your ascension to eldritch mind.”

“Mmh, sounds like a pain in the ass.”

“It’s clearly already a pain in the ass but word about a new third tier is going to get out whether you like it or not. It’s the sort of thing that can give people hope, and just as importantly, it can be a point of pride. I don’t want to go and announce it to the entire world on your behalf, but I would like to tell my other believers. You saw how Nare’s people celebrated your teacher’s ascension, right? It’s an achievement the rest of my faithful would love to hear and would be uplifting news for them in a time like this. Better than them hearing it through whatever distorted rumours are going around and just as importantly, despite your personality, you’re quite popular within the church for all you do.”

“I feel like you didn’t need to add that bit about my personality.”

“You know what I mean. So what do you say?”

“...Fine,” He sighed. “Tell them but at least tell the demidemons to keep it a secret, I don’t want word getting out around town. I guess this would be a good excuse to get a little gathering together too so tell them all tonight and then we can all meet up in Anailia tomorrow, at least with anyone close enough. I know it’s short notice but you’re their god, I’m sure most of them can make it work.”

“Ooh, gonna cater?”

“No, if I’m helping to raise the skills of every person on the planet I pass then I should get your believers done at least and more importantly, if they’re all in my range then I can try to force them all up a few more connect levels. Hell, so long as they don’t quit too soon then maybe we can even manage a few more awakenings, or get them to the ninth level I suppose. If I’m awakening anyone, I’m modifying their soul first and that’s not happening yet.”

“Or you could not do that.”

“No, I really need to see if the degree I can help people with leveling connect has grown at all now that my mind has changed so much so they all need to suffer through that. Tell Sachel and the demidemons to meet me at the shop at the end of the day and for everyone else to be waiting in your church in Anailia for us to arrive, get Valaria to go out to the gate network and hand out resistance amulets if necessary.”

“And now I immediately regret this,” The cube groaned. “My people don’t deserve the sort of treatment you’ll be putting them through.”

“Trying to turn them into second tiers?”

“Traumatizing them.”

“Think of it from this perspective, if the majority of your people are second tiers, there’s gotta be some bragging rights for you about that, doesn’t there?”

“Not if you break them all to get there.”

“Look, I’m probably not even going to awaken any so don’t worry, and if it looks like I can, well, then they’ll just have to participate when I get to soul modifying so they can reap all of the rewards.”

“Oh, infinite hells, that’s coming up soon too, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, and I’m way behind where I wanted to be for it,” Ben sighed and rubbed his face, thinking about how little time he had left for the achievements he wanted while Myriad watched in disbelief.

“What more could you possibly be hoping for?”

“At least one more third-tier skill for the growth bonuses?”

“...Well, if you end up succeeding, make sure you let me know. Do you actually have any ideas on how you’d even get there?”

“A few but none of them are working yet. It’s fine, it’s a barrier that needs to be chipped away at and I’m chipping every single day. It’s possible.”

It just hasn’t worked yet.

But that didn’t matter. He could do it; at worst it would just take time.

Time I don’t have. He complained, feeling the weight of the accomplishments he needed with them all still just out of reach. Man, what I wouldn’t give for some other way of getting there.