Becoming a Monster

Chapter 549 - 548: Existential Barrier

’Sacrificial Burden’.

Noah muttered the name of the skill quietly to himself.

The ability itself was surprisingly straightforward, and somehow that only made it feel even more fitting for someone like Dog.

The skill allowed the abilities centered around enhancing himself whenever he accumulated damage to now partially affect those who acknowledged him as their leader.

At first glance, the ability didn’t appear overwhelmingly powerful.

Dog’s three main abilities only truly became more dangerous the more damage he accumulated throughout a fight.

If that were the case, then by the time the benefits became substantial enough to significantly empower the others around him, they may have already died long beforehand.

But that line of thinking only applied when Dog himself wasn’t taken into consideration.

The beast possessed abilities almost entirely centered around survival.

Dog would gladly throw himself into danger before allowing those behind him to suffer first. Noah didn’t doubt that for even a second.

And because of that, the skill became infinitely more dangerous than it initially appeared.

The longer Dog remained standing, the greater the benefits surrounding his followers would become alongside him.

Not to mention...

Once the creatures beneath him eventually stopped being weak links themselves, the value of the skill would rise even further.

Noah’s gaze remained fixed on Dog’s broadening back while the wolf returned toward the others, anxiously waiting for him.

Thinking about it now, the direction of Dog’s growth reminded Noah heavily of Fenrir.

The two evolved with almost the exact same purpose. To protect what was precious to them.

And because of that, it made them natural leaders.

The same couldn’t be said for Alexandria.

Her transformation felt fundamentally different from Dog’s.

Dog’s evolution connected him more deeply with those who followed him.

Alexandria’s evolution almost did the opposite. It focused entirely on herself.

Perhaps the shadow truly wasn’t lying when it claimed Alexandria continuously lied to herself. That she was far more selfish than she desperately tried pretending to be.

But truthfully, that didn’t bother Noah in the slightest.

To be selfish and still choose to place your own desires aside for the survival of those depending on you...

That spoke far more about someone’s character than pretending those desires never existed in the first place.

Noah believed that only someone’s actions when their life was at risk revealed who they truly were.

And despite being hunted down by one, Alexandria still chose not to abandon the others beneath her just to ensure her own survival.

That fact alone already told Noah everything he needed to know about her character.

His thoughts gradually shifted back toward the ability she gained afterward.

Soulshadow Manifestation.

The skill was essentially her alter ego. They shared everything else, from their abilities to their physical strengths.

Just like Dog, her ability was just as simple. At least on the surface.

He had already witnessed firsthand that the skill could be one of the strongest abilities to have, and also one of the worst.

It wasn’t just a mindless puppet.

Alexandria had no control over it. No control over its actions, its thoughts, not even the ability to control when it could be summoned.

To most creatures, an ability that didn’t require conscious control would sound almost ideal.

A skill that could think and react for itself during battle was something countless beings would desire.

But that was also exactly where the problem lied.

The shadow turned out to be similar to her alter ego, possessing access to every part of Alexandria that she continuously suppressed within herself.

And if Alexandria struggled confronting those parts of herself internally before...

How exactly was she supposed to confront them now that they had been given a physical form?

”Nature really works in mysterious ways...” Noah muttered to himself again.

The more he witnessed these evolutions, the more he felt as though he was slowly approaching some fundamental truth hidden behind the world itself.

It wasn’t about his blood, but about evolution.

”What do you mean?”

Noah glanced toward his side afterward.

Only then did he realize he had almost forgotten Arachne was still beside him.

For a moment, Noah considered simply explaining his thoughts directly. What he was beginning to understand could benefit Arachne, too.

But only if he explained it in a way she would actually understand.

”Have you ever thought about how you would get stronger without me?”

The question caught her off guard. She never had a reason to think about it before.

Her eyes shifted slightly as she thought about the answer.

”I would hunt stronger prey... and eat them.”

She spoke honestly. That was what she felt was always the path to grow stronger. But for some reason, as she looked at Noah, she had a feeling that she was wrong.

Noah nodded slowly afterward. Truthfully, that was exactly the answer he expected.

To creatures like Arachne, growth was instinctive. Fight, kill, consume, and survive.

That alone was enough for most creatures to continue evolving naturally throughout their lives.

There were exceptions, of course.

Eventually, intelligent creatures became capable of pursuing growth more efficiently than instinct alone allowed. Some even managed to pass the first major hurdle required for evolution.

But then they would simply encounter another wall afterward.

Even Bolas wasn’t much different.

Not once had Noah ever heard him speak about training himself. Nor trying to understand what exactly he lacked after reaching his bottleneck.

Bolas simply accumulated power over time, through his own overwhelming existence.

And that was the point Noah was slowly beginning to understand.

Most creatures misunderstood evolution entirely.

At first glance, it was easy to believe a creature evolved by pursuing its desires.

Someone observing Dobby would naturally conclude that his growth stemmed from his desire for understanding and his willingness to shoulder burdens.

Dog’s evolution would appear tied to his desire to protect those he cared for.

But Noah now understood that those things were merely directions, and not the actual cause.

Desire shaped what a creature became. But it did not determine how they evolved.

His own evolution had already begun shaping his understanding of that truth long ago.

Yet Alexandria’s transformation removed whatever lingering doubts remained.

”I can tell that you don’t truly believe that anymore...” He watched as the last remnants of sunlight gradually disappeared.

”But I can also tell you that you aren’t necessarily wrong either.” The statement only seemed to confuse her further.

It almost sounded as though he was contradicting himself.

”Fighting stronger enemies alone wouldn’t cause evolution. But fighting an enemy where you genuinely put your life on the line could.”

”Why is that?”

Arachne remained silent for several moments.

Her thoughts instinctively drifted back toward the first time she genuinely believed she was going to die.

The Ant Queen held their lives in her hands, and it was that same battle that Noah had changed to overcome it. And afterward, that battle had changed all of them.

Arachne’s expression gradually relaxed afterward as she thought she understood where Noah was going with this.

”...Because fear forces us to surpass our limits?”

Noah nodded slowly.

”Yes. But you’re only half right.”

Arachne had stood taller for a moment when she thought she understood, only to feel oblivious again.

”What does surpassing your limits actually mean?”

Arachne frowned faintly. The most obvious answer was getting stronger, but after being wrong time after time, she was hesitant to answer.

”This world is eat or be eaten.”

”Countless creatures push their physical bodies to the brink every single day just to survive.”

”And yet most never evolve at all.”

”That’s when I understood that it’s not physical limits, it’s spiritual... Existential limits that make it possible.”

Noah was growing excited as he talked, and yet Arachne’s expression visibly blanked.

And the moment Noah saw it, he immediately realized he was explaining this horribly.

He stopped talking immediately.

Meanwhile, Arachne repeatedly turned his words over within her mind, trying to understand them properly.

But no matter how she thought about it, her understanding always circled back toward the same conclusion. Whenever she fought a strong opponent, she always grew physically stronger.

She couldn’t understand what else Noah was trying to point toward beyond that.

Fortunately, Ailetta made her way back to them.

”Arachne.”

The spider slowly looked toward her.

”When you survived that battle where you thought you were going to die...”

Ailetta’s smile softened slightly.

”Did you feel like the same person afterward?”

”Or did you come out of it believing you needed to become something more than who you were before?”

The question immediately caused her thoughts to go back again. She remembered how arrogant she was back then. But that battle changed her in more ways than just physically. The way she viewed the bonds she had changed.

Arachne slowly lowered her gaze afterward.

”...I wasn’t the same afterward.”

Noah looked from Ailetta to Arachne with a blank look that screamed, ’Isn’t that basically what I said?’ But he held it in, giving a slow nod as if that was what he was getting at all along.

”That was you experiencing a change in your existence.”

”I believe creatures evolve when they reach a contradiction they can no longer continue existing beneath.”

”For me... it was my fear of losing where I belonged.”

”I kept trying to remain human while simultaneously becoming something that could no longer truly be called one.”

His eyes narrowed thoughtfully.

”I lost sight of myself, and it was only when I let go of my fears that I was able to step on a path of a new existence.”

Arachne remained silent the entire time.

Gradually... She finally began understanding what Noah meant.

Noah’s gaze drifted toward the direction Alexandria had left earlier.

”Alexandria’s transformation made it even clearer.”

Arachne followed his gaze instinctively.

”Her barrier was practically laid out in front of her.”

”Her insecurities became her power, but it has also become her shackle.”

Noah looked back towards Arachne. The moment his eyes settled onto her, Arachne instinctively felt smaller beneath his gaze.

Whenever Noah looked at someone like this, it always felt as though he could see straight through them.

”You’re just like her in a way.”

He wasn’t able to continue when he noticed the way her body flinched. He had to hold back a chuckle as he felt a bit of jealousy rising from her, of all things.

”But...” He paused to make sure she was listening. ”Instead of all those insecurities, I believe that your greatest strength and your greatest flaw is that you continue to believe that the only way to prove your worth is through your strength alone.”

An explosion of shock ignited in her eyes.

Because she immediately realized he was right.

Ever since the beginning, strength was how she survived. Strength was how she hunted, how she remained useful beside Noah.

And without realizing it...

Somewhere along the way, Arachne began associating her own value with that strength.