A Guide to Humanity’s Extinction

Night had already fallen, and a deep darkness shrouded the streets and alleys of Leijing.

A silver-white Iron Dragon roared past on the distant elevated tracks, scattering stray sparks across the rails.

At that moment, Ke Linye and Xia Lingxue had just left Solomon Cafe.

The two chatted as they walked home. The summer evening breeze was cool, and cicadas chirped around them.

After a moment, Xia Lingxue hugged her shoulders and said out of the blue,

”I still think... we need to keep an eye on A’qing’s girlfriend.”

”Why do you say that all of a sudden?”

”So much happened last night, yet A’qing just happened to stay over at his girlfriend’s place. Don’t you think that’s a bit too much of a coincidence?”

”Come on, sis, can you stop torturing A’qing... please?” Ke Linye smiled helplessly.

”His safety is what’s most important.”Xia Lingxue said this expressionlessly, popping an Alpenliebe lollipop into her mouth.

”Don’t you feel like a control freak?”

Xia Lingxue didn’t deny it.

Ke Linye yawned and said meaningfully, ”How about this? I’ll point you in another direction so you don’t spend every day obsessing over A’qing and annoy him into running away from home.”

Xia Lingxue turned her head, looking at him quietly for a long moment before she spoke:

”Tell me.”

”If you have time to torture A’qing, you might as well go torture Blue Pigeon... The fact that he actually dared to flirt with our Xiao Li means he’s way too bold. Doesn’t he know that magical girls are all minors? He’s simply worse than a beast.”

Ke Linye spoke slowly, his face blank. ”From now on, we need to keep a close eye on anyone who approaches the magical girl Ember. Xiao Li’s situation is far too dangerous.”

”That’s not what you said before.” Xia Lingxue looked away.

”Then what did I say?”

”Oh, let me think about how you evaluated the magical girl Ember before,” Xia Lingxue said, resting her hand on her chin. ”A murderous girl... an irresponsible child who abuses her power?”

She paused there, her voice suddenly dropping into a faint, eerie whisper:

”Oh, you also said this right to Xiao Li’s face: ’I don’t think a magical girl who kills indiscriminately is any kind of good girl. But given her personality, it shouldn’t be long before she falls and becomes a witch. When that happens, she’ll be quietly disposed of, and won’t need to waste public resources anymore.’”

As her words fell, Xia Lingxue slowly turned her head, staring intently to savor Ke Linye’s expression.

Ke Linye lowered his head, staring blankly with a livid face for a moment before he shrugged, feigning nonchalance:

”Well... I admit my previous remarks were indeed a bit biased, and I really shouldn’t have said such things in front of my own sister.”

He paused for a moment, then suddenly composed his features and said solemnly,

”I want the whole world to know that Ember is a good girl. From now on, whenever I meet someone talking bad about her, I’ll kill them.”

”Has the guilt already driven you out of your mind?”

Xia Lingxue remained expressionless, letting out a cold sneer, and didn’t tease him any further.

As the siblings chatted, they soon caught sight of the old three-story residential building at the end of the long street. Right now, the living room was brightly lit, radiating a warm, orange glow outward.

And since the super-human species inherently possessed extraordinary hearing, they could hear the commotion coming from their living room even from a distance.

They walked over and stopped at the front door, looking through the floor-to-ceiling windows into the living room. Right now, on the sofa, Ke Mingqing was leaning his head against Xia Zili’s shoulder, playing with his phone.

Ke Linye dug through his jacket pocket for his keys, smiling as he spoke.

”That’s good. At least Xiao Li is already bouncing around again.”

”She wasn’t seriously injured in the first place,” Xia Lingxue said blankly. ”She just fainted, that’s all.”

Neither sibling chose to go inside immediately. Instead, they leaned their backs against the wall and stood outside the house.

Ke Linye looked up at the long street in the twilight. He thought for a moment, then asked:

”So only A’zhi hasn’t recovered yet. Hm... Are you sure you and A’zhi were just taking a walk at the port last night and accidentally got caught up in the Death Crow’s attack?”

Xia Lingxue remained silent for a long moment, then nodded.

”What else would it be?” she said. ”I don’t think there’s any need to ask her anything, lest it make her recall unpleasant things... Let’s just let A’zhi rest well upstairs today.”

”Alright, we’ll do as you say.”

Ke Linye shrugged and tilted his head, looking through the window at the two in the living room. ”Then we can’t let these two brats in the living room off the hook, can we? We should pull them into a meeting and get everything out in the open.”

Xia Lingxue hugged her shoulders, rubbing her temple with her free hand.

She thought about it, then looked up. ”Are you planning to reveal your identity to them?”

Ke Linye froze, looking at her in bewilderment. ”Why would you think that?”

Their eyes met.

”How else are you going to guide them into opening up?” Xia Lingxue asked.

”Oh, I don’t really have to out my own identity,” Ke Linye said, spreading his hands. ”Besides, that would be very awkward.”

”Awkward how?”

”If A’qing asks me later: ’Bro, what the hell is the Owl Judge? Why have I never heard of it?’ wouldn’t I die of embarrassment?”

Xia Lingxue sighed and said unhurriedly,

”At least it’s more famous than Executive Zero. We do covert work; we never flaunt it to the public.”

”Oh, if you put it that way, I really win out as the older brother.” Ke Linye smiled. ”At least there’s a chance they’ve heard of my title.”

”Idiot.”

Ke Linye shook his head. ”Forget it, let’s not talk about that for now. Shouldn’t we first determine if there’s anything strange going on with Mingqing?”

He paused.

”Maybe we got it all wrong before. He wasn’t possessed by a player, but rather awakened some kind of superpower, which is why he’s been acting so abnormally...”

Xia Lingxue lowered her head in thought. ”For example?”

Ke Linye looked up at the night sky. ”For example, when he was on the school bus, he was certain he could use his power to subdue the Termite Monster at any time. That’s why he had the confidence to act boldly in a situation where his combat strength seemed far inferior to his opponent’s.”

Xia Lingxue pondered for a moment, then with a soft crack, she bit through the candy in her mouth.

”If you put it that way, it does seem possible,” she said.

”Right?” Ke Linye tilted his head slightly, his pitch-black earrings swaying. ”Speaking of which, I’ve never asked you. As a control freak, what does it feel like to find that the people around you are gradually slipping out of your control?”

”Are you White Jack?” Xia Lingxue asked suddenly after a brief silence.

”Why do you ask?”

”He said the exact same thing to me,” Xia Lingxue mocked. ”It seems... you really have been assimilated by that white-assed freak.”

Ke Linye shrugged. ”I mean, why exactly does he understand us so well?”

”Is it possible he’s someone in our family?”

”For example?”

”Dad, Mom, A’qing...” Xia Lingxue said, her eyes shifting slightly. ”If we rule out Dad and Mom who are away on a business trip, doesn’t that leave only one person?”

Ke Linye was stunned for a short moment, then reached out and placed his hand on her shoulder.

He said, ”I suggest we just have that meeting.”

...

...

Three minutes later, in the living room of the Xia-Ke household.

The TV was broadcasting the animated series Magic Horn Detective. A jagged blue lightning bolt flashed across the screen, illuminating the abstract streets of Tuna Town, while the boy with lightning-shaped horns, Qi Letian, laughed with his hands on his hips.

Right then, Ke Linye walked into the living room. He stood silently behind the sofa and reached out to rub Ke Mingqing’s shoulder.

Xia Lingxue sat down next to Xia Zili without a word and crossed her legs.

Ke Mingqing and Xia Zili merely glanced at the two of them before looking away and continuing with their own things.

”Xiao Li, A’qing,” Ke Linye finally spoke up after a moment.

”What’s wrong?”

Ke Mingqing and Xia Zili didn’t even lift their heads, too lazy to even look at him.

”Before Dad and Mom get back, we need to have a meeting and clear some things up.”

Ke Mingqing was puzzled. ”What’s this about? Making it so grand—did Dad and Mom run into trouble abroad? A plane crash or some aerial disaster?” There was actually a hint of expectation in his tone.

Xia Lingxue shot him a cold glare and kept her mouth shut.

Ke Linye stayed silent for a moment before saying, ”Last night, we saw Xiao Li ’asleep’ at the front door. She was just lying there, completely motionless. She wouldn’t wake up no matter how much we called her.”

He paused. ”Does that not sound serious enough to you?”

Xia Zili froze.

Come to think of it, she indeed hadn’t asked how Xia Lingxue and Ke Linye found her. Rather, she didn’t want to dig into the matter, afraid it might uncover even more problems.

So she was dropped off at the front door?

But... who exactly brought her to the door?

Thinking of this, a figure unconsciously surfaced in Xia Zili’s mind. It was a ghastly white freak.

”Oh, right... if we’re having a meeting, should I go call Third Sis down?” Ke Mingqing asked, possessing a spectator’s mindset that didn’t mind if things blew up.

”Didn’t your Third Sis hit her head while jogging?” Ke Linye said coolly. ”Don’t torture her. Just the four of us will have the meeting. Let her rest properly.”

Xia Lingxue turned to look at Xia Zili and asked,

”So, about last night. Do you have anything to explain?”

Xia Zili stayed silent for a while. Cupping her hand over her mouth, she leaned closer to Ke Mingqing and muttered in a low whisper:

”Bro... what do we do?”

”I don’t know,” Ke Mingqing whispered back. ”Just don’t rat me out. When disaster strikes, every man for himself, okay?”

Xia Zili leaned back into place like a tumbler toy. She kept her head down in thought for a long time before saying:

”Last night, I was...”

Ke Linye lowered his eyes slightly, staring at her with curiosity. ”...You were what last night?”

Xia Zili looked up, speaking with righteous indignation. ”I was kidnapped by Bro and taken to his girlfriend’s house! He said he wanted to go to her place, but he didn’t have the guts to go alone, so he had to drag me along.”

”Cough... cough, cough...”

Ke Mingqing coughed twice, nearly spitting out the mouthful of orange juice he had just drunk.

He snapped his head around to glare at Xia Zili, wondering what the hell she was scheming now. But Xia Zili merely blinked at him, giving him a look that said, This young lady has everything under control.

Xia Lingxue and Ke Linye fell silent.

The two exchanged a glance. They both knew Xia Zili was spouting nonsense, but they chose to keep listening anyway.

”And then?” Ke Linye smiled. ”What happened after that?”

”You don’t know, but his girlfriend is a drunkard... She dragged us into chugging bottle after bottle of ice-cold beer. I usually don’t drink, so I got a bit tipsy.” Xia Zili paused to think. ”In the end, that young lady got a butler to drive me back. I rang the doorbell at the front door, and while I was waiting, I couldn’t help falling asleep... and then I ended up lying on the ground.”

She didn’t bat an eyelid through the entire story, as if it had actually happened. At the end, she even turned to look at Ke Mingqing and sighed lamentably:

”Minors really shouldn’t drink... Right, Bro?”

Ke Mingqing’s face was livid. He wanted nothing more than to kick this stinking sister in the rear, but ultimately, he cooperated fully and hummed a few sounds of agreement.

Ke Linye tilted his head and gave a low chuckle.

He could tell that Ke Mingqing was covering for Xia Zili. But this also meant Ke Mingqing very likely already knew about Xia Zili’s identity as a magical girl.

Xia Lingxue naturally took in every micro-expression and little scheme of the two. She was an executive of the Control Bureau; their subtle expressions could never escape her eyes.

”So... A’qing sent you away but didn’t leave himself, and stayed overnight at his girlfriend’s place?” Ke Linye raised an eyebrow.

”Exactly. He’s just a high schooler, yet he’s completely shameless.” Xia Zili nodded and snorted coldly. ”Staying over at his girlfriend’s house when he’s this young—I don’t even dare to imagine what they’ll do once they’re in college.”

Ke Mingqing shook his head and sighed, thinking, Just you wait, sis. Once I switch accounts, I’m going to mess with you. Lord White Jack will educate every lying child.

Xia Lingxue turned her head, her gaze fixed on Ke Mingqing.

”Invite your girlfriend over to our house. Big sis will drink with her.”

Ke Linye smiled. ”What a coincidence, I was thinking the same thing. Since you started dating this girlfriend of yours, your older brother and sister haven’t even properly met her yet.”

”Sunday,” Ke Mingqing said expressionlessly. ”I’ll invite her over for dinner this Sunday. Are you satisfied?”

”And then... about the drinking,” Ke Linye brought up.

”Okay, okay. We absolutely won’t drink beer ever again. Who knew she’d get so drunk that she’d just lie down right in front of the door.” As he spoke, Ke Mingqing reached out and poked Xia Zili hard on the forehead.

Xia Zili covered her reddened forehead and snapped her head to glare at him. Then, she suggested,

”Oh, right! Since you’re calling his girlfriend over, why don’t we invite my classmate over for dinner too?”

Ke Mingqing froze. It’s one thing to ruin my girlfriend, but why are you ruining Trash-Eating Hood?

He immediately began to tattle, opening his WeChat chat interface and silently sending a message to the person with the ID ”Little Match-Selling Red Riding Hood.”

”Why?”

”What does his girlfriend have to do with your classmate?”

Xia Lingxue and Ke Linye looked at Xia Zili and voiced the same question.

”You guys didn’t know? My classmate is Bro’s girlfriend’s maid, and she’s half-Chinese, half-Japanese too.”

After Xia Zili said this, her older brother and sister fell silent.

The two exchanged a look, seemingly not having expected such a thing as a maid to exist in twenty-first-century China.

Right then, Ke Mingqing suddenly poked his phone screen, playing a voice message he had just received.

Following that, a voice with a completely flat tone but speaking as fast as a machine gun broke the silence, ringing out in the living room:

”Excuse me, are you serious? Is your brain not actually broken? Can a little girl like me who grew up eating garbage really tag along with the young lady as a guest to her boyfriend’s house? Isn’t that a bit too progressive?

”Could it be... you’re doing this just to take care of my feelings? There’s absolutely no need for this kind of emotional charity. It should be strictly prohibited. It will only backfire.”

Ke Linye tilted his head slightly, unable to stop himself from freezing in surprise for a moment.

Xia Lingxue couldn’t help rubbing her temple, wondering just what kind of bizarre friends Xiao Li made at school.

”That’s it.” Ke Mingqing took a sip of orange juice. ”Are you sure you want to let such a weirdo come to our house for dinner?”

”It’s fine, invite her over too.” Ke Linye chuckled. ”She sounds like a very interesting kid.”

Xia Lingxue took a deep breath.

She had originally planned to refuse. After all, the house already had someone as erratic as their mom. If they added another one, wouldn’t the dinner table devolve into total chaos?

But since Ke Linye said so, never mind.

”Then it’s settled.” Xia Zili said expressionlessly. ”When the time comes, Bro’s boyfriend—bah, girlfriend... and my classmate will both come over for dinner.”

She clapped her hands together, the corners of her lips turning up slightly. ”This way, the young lady will have an acquaintance to look after her, so things won’t be too awkward at the table, right?”

”Sis, since when were you such a good person?” Ke Mingqing turned his head, staring at her eyes with disdain.

Xia Zili gave a faint snort and looked away.

Just then, due to WeChat’s autoplay mechanic, Ke Mingqing’s phone automatically played the next two voice messages sent by Little Red Riding Hood:

”I mean, it’s not like I can’t go, but sitting next to a little girl like me who grew up eating garbage, wouldn’t it ruin everyone’s appetite?

”Besides, bringing along someone as unpresentable as me might affect the impression Mr. Blue Pigeon’s family has of the young la—”

Hearing this, Xia Zili suddenly froze, her lips parting.

Ke Mingqing froze as well, but his reaction was lightning fast. He tapped the voice bubble on the screen, and in the very next second, An Youlu’s voice abruptly cut off.

A deathly absolute silence once again shrouded the living room.

After a long moment, Ke Linye raised an eyebrow. He pondered for a second, then asked,

”Hm, did I mishear... Did Xiao Li’s friend just mention ’Blue Pigeon’?”

”No, I think I heard it too.”

Xia Lingxue frowned slightly.

The girl in the WeChat voice message had spoken so fast that neither of them fully caught what she said, but they both managed to catch that one keyword.

Xia Zili and Ke Mingqing were silent as a winter cicada, frozen stiff on the sofa.

After a while, they silently exchanged a glance. Then, they slowly raised their heads from the sofa, meeting their older brother and sister’s eyes.

Ke Mingqing asked dryly, ”You misheard. What ’Blue Pigeon’?”

Xia Zili thought for a second. ”My classmate is Blue Pigeon’s number one fan. When we chat, she can mention Blue Pigeon eight hundred times a day. It’s totally normal for her to slip up.”

Ke Linye tilted his head slightly, calmly observing the two of them.

At this moment, Xia Lingxue folded her arms and commanded:

”Play it again. Let me hear what she said in that voice message.”